FIGHT CLUB
by Ro Nordmann
Summary: I fight. I f-k. I bleed. I occasionally blackout, then I don't remember what the f-k I've done and with whom... Sh-t. [REPOST] Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. No copyright infringement is intended. Best Crossover Story - The Wordsmith Awards
1. Welcome to my life

My head was pounding.

Grunt.

Fuck, stop the pounding.

Blood had dried on my face. The smell of sweat and blood was overwhelming.

My stomach was starting to turn. The urge to upchuck was getting stronger by the second.

Turning sideways, I noticed I was on the floor.

Fallen asleep again or passed out on the fucking floor.

That was going to hurt like a motherfucker. Where was Jerksper, that fucker?

The only problem was he was nowhere and I wasn't alone.

Who was this bitch?

Naked.

Then I became aware so was I...

I blacked out again.

Meaning who knows what the fuck I've been up to and who I've fucked all night.

Welcome to my life.


	2. The Rules of Fight Club

I'm a pussy and ran like one.

There was no way I was staying around for the after-one-night-stand awkwardness.

It wasn't like we were in love and looking for happily ever fucking after.

Edward Fucking Cullen didn't do ever afters.

What's my story?

Simple.

I was orphan at age 13.

Sent to foster care and got beat up on a daily by my foster-father.

Got tossed around from group homes were I met my mates, Emmett McCarty, Jasper Whitlock and Riley Biers.

We bonded for life, making a vow we would survive and fuck those who fucked with us.

That is how Fight Club started. A survival mechanism to hone our skills to beat each other to death.

No one had died yet... I could hope.

It isn't just us anymore.

It seems what we do, others wanna be a part of.

We live by the rules.

No one talks about Fight Club.

**1st RULE: You do not talk about FIGHT CLUB.**

**2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about FIGHT CLUB.**

**3rd RULE: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the fight is over.**

**4th RULE: Only two guys to a fight.**

**5th RULE: One fight at a time.**

**6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.**

**7th RULE: Fights will go on as long as they have to.**

**8th RULE: If this is your first night at FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight.**


	3. I don't fuck ugly women, ever

"Hey Masen! Wait up..."

I shivers runs down my spine.

If he calls me by Masen... it means he's in Fight Club.

How did I end up here?

Oh yeah... I didn't know where I was.

It was a dirty old motel room, where I ended with that naked beautiful woman.

Beautiful?

Well, she was in her birthday suit and so was I.

I don't fuck ugly women, ever.

I might be fucked up in the head, but never stupid enough to fuck anything with tits and ass.

That's Emmett's MO.

Finally the guy catches up to me and I kind of recognize him.

"Nice shiner man. You are fucking machine. How can you be walking and not in a hospital bed is beyond me. Going to work? Man you need to shower and change first. Where is the gang? You are usually surrounded by Jas and Em, love those guys..."

"SHUT UP! Man you blab worse than a bitch... My head is pounding and if you keep it up you will make me break the rule and fuck you up right here, now!"

"Sorry, Masen. See you tonight."

The fucker stopped eye contact and fucking ran away like the little bitch he is.

Totally wouldn't mind pounding him and seeing his nose bleed.


	4. Carl's way

Carlisle is my older brother.

He was seventeen.

But those eight months we lived on the system together were enough to fuck him up.

Just as they fucked up mine.

I took rage as my way, he took drugs as his.

And a dose of rage Carl's way.

Just don't point it out to his face.

There's nothing more emasculating than being beaten and raped by your so-called custodian.

No wonder I piss on anyone that says they know hell.

I know hell and how it lives on your fucking skin, and there's nothing to cleanse it off.

How he did become a doctor is a mystery to me.

And how he loves to beat fuckers up for sport, well that makes him my brother.


	5. I've had worse, so much worse

This day couldn't end any faster.

I go to the crummy loft apartment we share, the two fuckers that left me... and sometimes Carl crashes over after taking care of our battle wounds.

It's helpful to have a doctor in the pack.

No hospital visits.

No suspicion from the coppers.

I hate cops.

I'm no stranger to spending a night or more in the slammer.

What can I say, I love to rage, with my fists on your fucking face, thank you very much.

It's shower time and a good wank for measure.

My knuckles hurt but I don't fucking care.

I've had worse, so much worse.

Taking my hard cock in my fisted hand, the image of a naked brunette writhing on top, comes to my mind's eye.

It's so strong, I almost slipped in the fucking tub.

I blame the fucking migraine that wants to split my brain in two.


	6. A strapping young twenty-five year old

"Hey Assward, where did you go? Don't tell me, to that seedy motel in Port Angeles, were you take all the fucking cunts that open their legs to ya... Was it a good lay at least? She was a bit fucked up, I think you chose her, just for that. Nothing beats an incapacitated horny bitch ready for the pounding your hard dick can do... Damn, I'm getting hard just thinking about it."

"Want me to suck it for ya, Em?"

"Man, I don't need to know about your prowess on the subject. I was one of the lucky ones. My ass and mouth are still dick virgins."

"Want me to remedy that? I'll show what a real man can do... You seem to need a good hard fucking, doesn't he Jas? Let's show him what's he's been missing..."

"Good job, hard-on gone. Fuckers. It sounds to me like you to enjoyed fucking each other when you were both fifteen more than you let on. Maybe do each other once in a while too. Not that it's any of my business what you do with your orifices and cocks. All I know is am a pussy and my dick goes in and out until and cum all over."

Jasper looks at Em's direction, and I'm pretty sure what he's thinking... if I was gay, he would be my soul mate. He knows my demons, and I know his demons. I have to admit he's a handsome chap, who used to be blonde heart-throb that got "neglected and abused" by his adoring mother. What the neighbors didn't know was that the southern belle was fucking her own son, for years. He was lost and we found each other in hell. If there's a another man I love more than my bother Carl, its Jas.

Even though he is as tough as any motherfucker in Fight Club, he has a heart, that bleeds for normalcy, deep down he wants what the rest of the sheep want.

I don't care one fuck what society expects of a strapping young twenty-five year old.

It's a fucking miracle I still draw breath.


	7. Break the rules and I break you

"Welcome to tonight's session

The board has the first five sets of fights. Those of you interested in participating add yourself to the board and I'm sure you will get a partner to beat your shit as soon as your name is up, and if no takers sign up; I'll be you black and blue myself. Shirts off."

Carl knows how to command a room. I'm still trying to recuperate from the mother of migraines. I swear I must have a fucking tumor and have only days to live.

Don't care, I'm here and it's where I wanna be.

Only eight rules... wait that's the fucker from this morning or afternoon, I forget what's he's name... Oh yeah, Riley. I should fucked his ass when I had the chance.

That way he wouldn't forget the rules we live by.

He's mine tonight.

Wicked crooked grin on my face.

Probably looks like I'm having a seizure, but this fucker is mine.

I move to the center of the basement we are using tonight. We change venues constantly, no need to get all of us arrested. Port Angeles has great places for our meetings, forgotten abandoned places for testosterone be released to its full potential. Living in Seattle, you would think we could hold 'em there... but you shouldn't eat and shit were you fight.

They move as if I'm the Godfather, but then I'm crazy motherfucker you don't want to mess with. I can smell fear and their adrenaline pumping in their veins, the anticipation in their eyes almost gets me hard.

Fuck, I need to get laid.

That brunette, now on her knees taking my hard cock inside her mouth, between wet lips.

I sway on my feet.

Carl notices and frowns.

Shit, here he comes, the overprotective older brother.

No fucking way am I sitting tonight out.

"It has come to my attention that breaking rules means nothing to some of you. THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE."

Silence.

With a side glance I notice, that bitch Riley blanched. Yeah, fucker I remember what you said, and who you are. Another reject from the system, who has the marks all of his torso, his lovely stepfather took it out on his chest, burning it with his cigar. I got a bj once from him, not bad, the kid has no gag reflex.

No matter, he was going down.

"New rule, number 9, **Break the rules and I break you. True? Good. Let's begin."**

He swallows, and nods.

That's all I need.

It's as good as getting my cock wet.


	8. I think I just hallucinated and got hard

Between puke and sweat stink.

It's my turn.

I hear a click inside my head.

I shake my shoulders, setting myself into fight mode.

Do or die.

Well, not exactly, but it's against Fight Club honor code not to finish a fight.

I breathe deeply, even if the air is vile.

Emmett is on a corner wearing a deranged smile, leaning against the bloodied wall. He took out a new guy.

He had no chance, the poor bastard had the guts to have Emmett as his first fight.

I shake my head, Carl has his hands full.

He won't be watching and that's good for me.

It means he won't try to stop me.

I know he's worried for me. He wants me checked out.

The fucking headaches and blackouts.

They won't stop me.

My heart rate picks up, and so does my breathing.

I stalk my prey, as a mountain lion ready to pounce.

Yeah, fucker you are mine.

Suddenly, in my peripheral vision, I see Jasper puke his guts out all over the floor.

Huh, something must have triggered a memory.

No matter, I have pussy-ass to beat up.

Have to give to Riley, he at least comes forward, takes he stance and practically waits for the first punch.

I shake my head "no", it will not go down that way.

He grimaces, knowing there's no easy way out.

He won't risk getting ostracized from Fight Club.

Not now, when he knows everyone is privy to the fact he's the one who violated the rules.

There's no need for explanations.

This is not fucking group therapy with donuts and coffee and a shoulder to cry on.

That's what AA meetings are for.

He closes his eyes, and takes his first hit.

I ducked, but then I lose focus when a vision, the brunette from my fantasies walks in... then pain.

Blood drips.

And then black spots appear in my vision.

Fuck my life.

I think I just hallucinated and got hard.


	9. But no women, ever

In and out of consciousness.

Well I think I'm.

Sometimes I hear Carl's distressed voice.

Jasper is panicking and I hear a struggle and a screamed "FUCK". I wanna smile, he must have hit someone in retaliation. He can't deal, when am hurt.

It scares him, and hides it with male bravado.

Emmett thinks Jasper is not so secretly in love with me.

Once a upon a time, he was, and in a way so was I.

As close as love, as I can come.

There was no anger or fear.

We were equals. We still are.

Then I feel like my head is cushion on luscious, bouncy breasts.

And I smell her.

How can that be?

The basement stank of sweaty men with poor hygiene, blood and vomit.

Sometimes even shit.

There is no discrimination in Fight Club.

Old.

Young.

Thin.

Fat.

Healthy.

Dying.

You are in. You fight. Period.

But no women, ever.

I'm hallucinating and now I don't give a fuck.

Its better than the alternative,

REALITY.


	10. No need to get your g-strings in a twist

Grunt.

Fuck, I hurt all over.

"Hey, man! Good you have joined the land of the living. I thought I was going to have to make your wake alone, between your brother freaking out and Jasper becoming a basket case, I was the only sane one. That's some scary shit."

My brilliant come back...

"Huh... argh..."

"Don't exert yourself. You have a concussion. Who is the brunette you keep mumbling about? Is that your latest squeeze? Just so you know I think you hurt your boyfriend's feelings and he got pissed-ass drunk and I think he took the first skank that walked his way. Some dwarf with almost shave off dark hair."

His monologue gets interrupted by Carl.

He's on a rampage.

"That's it. You are getting a fucking MRI and blood work. You need to eat and sleep. Look at Jasper for fuck's sake, he's a zombie with that fucking untreated insomnia. I don't give a shit what your reasons are you are going to yield and do this. I'm your older brother, DAMMIT! How many times have you lost consciousness, Edward?"

Blink.

Yawn.

Blink.

Emmett guffaws and says his goodbyes. The fucker is the next one on my list and he's gonna be flat on his back at the night's end.

I swear.

Carl is in the makeshift kitchen, making a racket.

He would get some too, if I could fucking stand straight.

"Where is Jas?"

My voice is hoarse and my throat is sore.

As if I've spent all night blowing and deep throating thick cocks.

The good old days.

Fuck, maybe I should take up drugs again.

Or drink until oblivion.

"... He was in bad shape, I found him passed out, on the hall. He's sleeping in his room. Stinking of cheap perfume and was barely dressed. Seems he took it out on some poor unsuspecting girl..."

Uncontrollable laughter.

They don't know Jas, like I do.

He would never take out on women, it's not his style.

On men, well that's another story.

"Edward? Are you listening? FUCK! Edward?"

"Yes. Sorry, just spaced out. No need to get your g-strings in a twist, Carl. I'm fine, just some rest and painkillers and I'll be good as new."

"Who's Isabella?"

Isabella?

Fuck...

"Carl... was there a woman in that basement last night?"


	11. The life we had did that to us

Isabella

The ghost of Christmas Present...

I felt a tightening in my gut.

The look Carl threw at me, proved I had lost my bloody marbles.

No excuses.

MRI

Blood panel

Possibly a psych consult.

Shit.

It certainly wasn't fun now having a brother for a doctor.

If there was someone who loved me more than my mates, it was Carl.

He was still unmarried inexplicably.

Good looking motherfucker that he is.

It made him popular back in the day.

Even if he was scrawny teenager back then.

It's no wonder he is fit and having ripped abs.

He can probably knock out Em in five minutes flat.

The life we had done that to us.

Meanwhile, Em wasn't part of the shit most of us went through, 'cause the kid had the build of a monster-truck even then.

He intimidated every bully and possible predator with his bulging physique.

If only they known he is a big fucking teddy bear, and loyal to a fault.

They would've used that loyalty against him.

Of course, his life wasn't hearts and kittens either.

He ended in the system, after being found alone, only five years old, inside a dilapidated building. His crack snorting whore of a mother forgot him after getting her latest fix, never heard from again.

Good riddance, bitch!

Father unknown.

No big fucking surprise there.

What a startling menagerie of fuck ups we are.

All these thoughts go through my head, barrage of miasma that doesn't seem to stop.

I feel like I should just bolt from the sterile exam room.

Carl gives the death glare.

If there is one person who can control my impulses with a stare its him.

You could say he became my surrogate father figure, with only about five years older than me.

If I'm truthful, when I was young and naïve, I worshipped he ground he stand on.

I notice an attractive nurse, by the name of Carmen, is flirting with Carl.

Disgusting.

She is clearly married and Carl is trying to give her the cold shoulder and be the gentleman.

He's the one of us with moral fiber, or so he tells himself.

I bet every morning he looks himself in the mirror and gives the pep talk: I'm a handsome MOFO and I have moral fiber.

GAG

I call bullshit.

If I was him, she would be stripped, fucked, and sent on her merry way already.

Static.

That's all I hear inside my head.

I need the click.

I makes me feel sane.

I don't care what the results say, I'm fighting tonight.


	12. We live by them

Another doctor comes by.

I bet he is the husband of that hussy nurse.

I zoned out thinking of the predicament I'm in. Thanks to Em's stupidity, we are to hold an exclusive tournament with the Volturi crew. I need to show them the Cullen clan is still running strong.

Those fuckers are just posers, who are really murders and drug smugglers for their granddaddy, Aro Volturi. I know he likes young boys, pretty ones to suck his dick and fuck their virginal asses. I feel the rage going, as if it's a liquid swimming through my body. My heart rate monitor starts beeping, and Carlisle excuses himself from the nurses' counter to check on me.

One look and he knows it's all me.

He gives a calmer gaze, intend on getting me to calm the fuck out.

If not it wouldn't be beneath him to get me hospitalized for the night.

Fight Club isn't about getting someone else killed.

The rumors surrounding the Volturi are no laughing matter.

They are the mafia in these parts.

They have no rules.

We live by them.

Stupid Emmett and his running mouth got us in this mess, getting mixed up with serial killers.

He wants to fuck up, on of their guard, a big-ass bastard they call Demetri.

He is as big and ripped as Emmett, so you would say it would be a very close fight.

He did get his face bloodied up after it, but we still have to go through the tournament.

And I fear someone may pay with his life.

If Carl finds out...

Lets just say dead and buried.

Suddenly, I smell and feel certain womanly curves.

She's back.

And now she has a name...

Isabella.

Too bad I don't know if she is real or the product of my deranged imagination.


	13. I need a damn drink

I'm out.

Nothing conclusive.

At least if it's a tumor, it would fucking show on the MRI, right?

Recommendations for more tests.

I told 'em to suck my hard cock.

Gasps and shocked looks surround me.

Pfft.

How Carl can stand it all eludes me.

Yes, I know I'm smart. I was classified as highly intelligent back when I cared about my education, when I had a family, a real mom and dad.

Full of potential

Too bad that all went to hell and I burned in its fiery pits.

Don't get me wrong, I like who I am now.

It's a version of me, that's strong and doesn't take shit from anyone.

I'm feared and revered by my peers.

Fucking snort.

And I get all the pussy I want, without making much effort from my part.

As I leave the premises of the hospital I get an inkling I should re-visit the scene of the crime...

That seedy motel room, where I woke up naked and she.. was there beside me naked as the day she was born.

Or was she?

If I don't find her, I'm 'fraid Carl will get me doped up on anti-psychotic medication.

I won't be able to fight or fuck.

So screw the medication.

She has to be real.

I've hallucinated about her a couple of times.

It must be based on a real encounter.

It doesn't make sense.

I'm not like this, hung-up on a single woman.

Obsessed.

I tug what's left of my hair... and think I better chop it all off, that way I won't go bald.

Just thinking about her brings to mind olfactory and visual stimuli.

Don't think of the brunette

Don't think of the brunette

Don't think of the brunette

or you'll get hard in the middle of the sidewalk and that's just perverted.

Thank fuck for long shirts.

The motel is a dead-end.

Too many costumers.

Figures.

The guy that works the counter had a good laugh at my expense.

I almost lost it and clocked him out.

Not good if I got arrested on assault and battery.

In the scheme of things it would be just one more in my long ass criminal record.

I need a damn drink.

There's a bar not too far from the motel, just around the corner.

I've been here before, the memory just escapes me.

I get goosebumps all over my arms.

It's as if my body knows she's near.

The door opens before I get to it.

Out comes:

a midget of a girl with a shaved head and...

my fucking Isabella.

"ANTHONY!"

She's drunk and falls into my arms.

I'm so fucked.


	14. Ok, I think I'm in love with this woman

Was she real?

I could feel... her warmth.

I could smell her hair... mmm.

She was in my arms.

But she called me... Anthony.

"ANTHOOOOOOONYYYYYYY, where the fuuuuuck have you been hiding you gorgeoussssss motherfuckeeeeeer? I've missed you and your thick hard cock..."

"Beeeeeeellllllaaaaaa! For fuck's sake we are on the street. . . .Mouth."

The midget talks and it grates my ears.

UGH!

She makes eye contact and ducks her eyes immediately.

Yeah, she is a skittish little thing.

I could break like a twig.

I kind of like my dead-weight more, even if drunk and loud as fuck.

I shake her off me and she stumbles.

"FUCKER! I could fall, you asshole!"

Oh, that mouth I want it now, on my cock.

Visions once again swim on my mind... her lips engorged, up and down on me.

Her whimpers as she rides me with total abandon.

On her hands and knees as I pound her without mercy.

Fuck, I'm hard and I take Isabella back in my arms and fucking dry hump, right there on the street.

"Anthony, take me home... let's make duuuurty fucking seeeeex against the wall..."

Ok, I think I'm in love with this woman.

And I think I've fucked her more than once.

How is that possible?

The midget fidgets in place and looks sideways, she wants to bolt.

She doesn't.

Hmmm... maybe they are good friends.

"Bella, let Anthony go, you need to crash and sleep it off. Sorry, mister she's been bombed 'cause she hasn't seen this guy. She's well pardon my french, fucking. Come along, Bella."

She takes Bella by her arm and pulls her from my grasp.

I'm momentarily paralyzed in place.

What does this mean?

She knows me.

We've fucked like rabbits.

And she calls me Anthony.

"Hey! Wait! Midget don't take my Isabella away!"

What should happen next?

Bella upchucks on the sidewalk like a fucking pro.

Nice going, genius.


	15. The hole that lives in him, lives in me

I was home.

I had woken up in my designated room.

All the others were already taken before I had pick.

Serves me right, I would've fought them for first pick.

I try to remember what I had to do today... it's a bit foggy.

Nevermind.

A hand slithered over my naked torso, stroking my skin.

I know that hand, almost has good as my own.

A hand that is not delicate or fragile, but at the same time bleeds and breaks like any other.

It takes what it wants, and I give it gladly.

A groan escapes.

A twist of the wrist and my breathing speeds up.

"Fuck... yes, faster..."

In a panting breath, I urge the hand to fuck me.

It fondles my balls, and I'm almost there.

My eyes closed.

Only my pants are heard.

When I think I'm about to come... a mouth envelops me in its depths.

Abruptly, I gaze upon those hazel eyes.

Those eyes.

I know those eyes.

I know those lips.

I grasp his hair, tugging just like he likes it.

He hums in appreciation.

It would seem he needs this more than I...

No one understands, why would they?

The hole that lives in him, lives in me.

This moment reminds of lost fifteen year olds, with nothing to lose, but also nothing to gain.

Then, his hair was blonde, a wheat color, longer.

His eyes rimmed black as night.

His gaze told of stories better left unsaid.

Even now, if you looked deep enough, it could swallow you whole.

I wonder what my own gaze says...

Well, most of time it tells - get out of my way or I'll break you.

He knows.

He understands.

No judgement.

No regrets between us.

Carl once said I was lucky...

I glared and said what the fuck I was lucky for, his answer was I had someone who would willing lay down his life for me.

Confused, I responded I would do it for him.

His reply: "It would be our duty as brothers, but he would freely do it for you."

He swallows.

He takes.

I give.


	16. Serves you right, honey buns

I needed a new fucking job.

Last one, I kind of asked to get sacked.

Punching the manager would do that.

And getting a restraining order could help too...

So here are my references: I fight. I fuck. I bleed.

Occasionally blackout and then I don't remember what the fuck I've done and with whom...

Shit, that will get me hired with the flick of a switch.

Maybe Carl is right, I could run a drug dealing business, but then I would need a gun... I don't need it.

I like to negotiate with my fists.

More honorable.

Face to face.

Only sweat, blood and tears as my company.

I'm looking forward to tonight's session... I don't give a shit what Carl's objections.

I need the click.

Even if it kills me.

He is hiding something.

It can't be that bad.

If not he would've strapped me to the bed.

Carl needs to get laid pronto.

I wonder if I could send some complementary pussy his way, one he can't refuse...

Emmett makes his living tinkering with cars.

He loves it so much, sometimes I think he gets wood.

Told ya, we are a menagerie of perverted fuck ups.

He gives the salute, which consists of the middle finger.

"Hey Eddie-kins, still part of the unemployed masses? No openings here, by the way... and you know shit about cars."

That's as far as he gets, out of breath.

I punched him in the kidneys.

He may be like a brother, my mate, a member of the Cullen clan.

But Eddie-kins?

Fuck, no.

Struggling he answers: " ugh... fuck. Are we fighting each other tonight? 'Cause I would like to deck you."

"Having a fantasy there honey buns? Remember who you're talking to... I could break something of value to you by night's end..."

"It can't be as worse as the ass-whopping I got from that lesbo chick, I thought was into dick. Damn that woman should join us. Mmm mmm... the tits on her, I can imagine her without a shirt. It would be priceless to see her beat to pulp that sleazy-ass motherfucker James. I think he was a hard-on for you Ed."

Emmett thinks he is a comedian.

And charming as Prince Charming.

News flash he might as well be Charmin and clean up his own shit.

"Have you forgotten you need to concentrate on staying alive to fight Demetri? Have you found a place for the tournament?"

"Chillax, Ed. I'm invincible, remember? No chick is stronger than this", he flaunts his biceps, flexing the muscles. I swear, if Carl doesn't kill him, I will.

"Em FOCUS. What did that twat looking Felix say to you the other night? I saw him talking to you right outside the basement?"

I detested the fact the Volturi had infiltrated Fight Club.

Felix had gotten in.

Not a bad fighter, but he wasn't trustworthy.

"Oh, he said Aro wanted to see you fight, since you are legendary. Also, he would like to hire Carl as personal doctor... Pfft as if Doctor Fuck Me Hard would leave the hospital, he's got his eyes set on hot nurse."

"Who Carmen? Please, she is a skank and married. Carl would never tap that."

"Are you his keeper? Let the man blow, he needs to release. I don't think he has spanked the monkey in a long time. It's no surprise he took Laurent within five minutes last night. Too uptight, he didn't let the poor bastard get one hit."

"Carl can't know about the Volturi's interest. You hear, Em? NOTHING."

"M'Okay. Sheesh, I thought you would've unwind after hooking up with that hellcat Bella. Damn she's hot, but got eyes only for you... I think I'm a bit jealous, what I would have done to that ass... FUCK, arghhh man I think you broke my nose... AGAIN."

Serves you right, honey buns.

That ass is mine.

Wait... He knows about Isa...Bella?


	17. Someone just broke Rule 1

I turn around.

I need to ask him.

"Isabella? Is that the brunette you keep talking about when you are all kinds of fucked up?"

"Um... Isabella and Bella are the same woman. How do you know her? Do you know where she lives? Where have you seen us together, Emmett?"

"WOAH! Stop it with the twenty questions, don't you remember? Oh, this cracks me up, you hook up with this chick, and now you don't even remember... I have to tell the guys, Carl is gonna have a fit."

He guffaws.

I want to make him re-bleed.

"I saw earlier today, outside the bar, close to the motel, in Port Angeles... she was drunk out of her mind and with a midget, a shy, skittish, shaved head girl. She wanted to bolt immediately once she saw me. Don't remember ever meeting her."

"A midget? Oh, you must have met... Shit, I need to get back to work. I want to keep this job, or else I'll be a vagrant like you, and probably get myself arrested. No, thanks Assward. See you later tonight, I'll watching the board, sweet-cakes, ciao."

And I'm left with not much.

At least I know she's a real woman.

She sort of remembers me.

Anthony.

I fidget.

I have an itch, I can't scratch.

Most of us have here.

Carl is missing in action.

Where is the fucker?

He knows where the session was held.

Is not like him to skip, at the very least he would've contacted me.

I check my cheap-ass mobile phone.

Nothing.

Maybe it's broken.

"Jas, have you heard from Carl? He's late."

I'm getting pissed.

Felix isn't here either.

That asshole better stay the fuck away from Carl, and not have discussed the Aro's plans.

My match for tonight is James.

Not the first time we have fought.

Noticed him watching closely most nights.

Shaking my limbs, I nod.

I'm ready.

It doesn't matter Carl isn't here.

If I need his help, he'll come to the apartment.

James spits and comes forward at the ready.

Cocky much.

I grin, 'cause well he is going to lose it, soon.

His jab misses and I hit back right at the stomach.

He recovers and hits me right in the jaw.

Blood spills.

My vision gets clearer.

Click.

Masen is here.

A left hook, he stumbles.

His nose bleeds profusely.

I don't lose focus and a right hook right to the left kidney makes him whimper.

I don't let him touch me again.

Sweat covers my skin.

Another hook right on his forehead, and he goes down.

I win.

I stand tall in the middle.

All of Fight Club surrounds me.

Jas looks like he needs to sleep for a week.

Emmett has a slip lip, but will live another day.

Carl... Where are you, brother?

Suddenly, a door opens and in come this red-head, in a fit of hysterical sobs.

She goes directly to James.

What the fuck?

Laurent is right behind.

I. Don't. Fucking. Like. It.

Someone just broke Rule 1.

It seems, I have to invoke Rule 9.


	18. He doesn't exist anymore

"EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP! You asshole, explain to me... what is she doing here? What is the FIRST RULE? Hmm... Oh yeah, lets remind some people seemed to have forgotten the rules we live by:

**First Rule: You do not talk about FIGHT CLUB.**

**Second Rule: You DO NOT talk about FIGHT CLUB.**

SIMPLE.

Then why the FUCK is there a woman here?

James you're expelled. Since I won, you may leave as you are.

As for you Laurent, I get to break you."

With great satisfaction.

Emmett moves into action and helps James get up.

James glares my way.

I simply stand.

He doesn't exist anymore.

"I'm calling the cops! You fucker, look what you did to my Jamieee... Baby lets take you to the hospital, please..."

She begs pathetically.

James responds by slapping, she tumbles to the blood spattered floor.

She looks frightened, but it's definitely the first time he's hit her.

Emmett grabs him by the neck.

"GET. THE. FUCK. OUT."

Unconscious, I'm in place to pounce on him.

Jas gets a hold of my arm.

He shakes his head.

"Let Em handle this. You need to kick Laurent's ass. I'll watch over the woman. If she goes back to him, there's not much we can do, now, but certainly wouldn't mind relieving her of her plight."

There is the knight in shinning armor.

Always to the rescue of the damsel in distress.

You would think he would've outgrown that chivalry, after all it was his mother who instilled those values.

May she burn in hell.

Laurent takes his t-shirt off.

He is no Emmett, but can take a hit.

I can see he is still wearing my bother's marks on him.

It makes me smirk, and once again I'm reminded he isn't here.

Everyone's eyes are on us now.

I circle to the left, he circles to the right.

Adrenaline is pumping in my veins.

Moving my neck, taking out the kinks, relaxes my muscles.

I signal him to come forward.

This ends now.

I hiss, 'cause this fucker is scum.

Never liked him, don't fucking trust him.

From the crowd, some yells "FINISH HIM!"

Jake is getting loud tonight.

Quill holds him.

That guy tends to forget Rule 4 & 5.

That distraction give Laurent the upper hand momentarily.

My head feels foggy.

I see her.

I can feel.

Undulating.

Another hit, clears my vision and I run him over.

I hit him consecutively, breaking his nose and cutting his face.

His on the floor, and I'm on top straddling his chest.

I keep pounding him to unconsciousness.

If I keep this up, I'll kill him.

But the click keeps me going.

The boisterous sounds that surround me egg me on.

Then, I'm off that piece of shit.

I don't even know if he still breathes.

Jas is holding me, if not I would probably be face down drowning in my blood.

"Edward! Look at me! FUCK, where the hell is Carlisle? Em get everyone out, we need to take Ed home."

Those are the last words I hear.

And the last thing I see is...

My Isabella.


	19. I'm silent as a grave

I'm groggy, barely can distinguish my own fucking hand.

Carl must have drugged me good last night.

I'm alone in what we call the living room.

It's more of a bomb shelter with a LCD TV and every game console imaginable.

The futon has helped my back some, but I still ache.

I find my hands are bandaged and tapered.

I have stitches on my brow.

Motherfucker.

Another scar to entice the ladies.

I get a certain feeling that I might have been out for a long time.

Hopefully not more than a day.

If it was so critical I would be in a hospital bed.

Carl doesn't kid around, he said if I lost consciousness again he was going to take matters into his owns hands.

Even if he had to deck me to get my compliance.

I pointed it out, it was counterproductive.

He gave me his death glare.

Fine.

I'm silent as a grave.

Jas must be at the record store, his shift.

That guy loves guitars.

Somehow fighting hasn't fucked his playing.

Once upon I time I would join him.

Our own musical sessions.

But that hasn't happened... I know he misses it.

Carl slams the front door.

"Finally up, eh? Wanna explain what the fuck Aro Volturi wants with me? If you were not already fucked up, I would break fucking jaw... Edward, this is dangerous. We are not playing teenage-angst games anymore. Why didn't you tell me he got word on Fight Club? That one of his own was taking part of the fights? Someone needs to get beaten up over this. FUCKING TALK ALREADY, you SMUG MOTHERFUCKER?"

I cough.

My throat is dry.

He rolls his eyes and turns back towards the faucet.

Comes towards me, glass in hand.

I take a sip.

He knows I'm stalling.

"Well? Who do I have to break? At the very least dislocate his fucking shoulder..."

He keeps talking... how many bones he will break and how.

Carl sometimes gives me the willies.

He could kill you and you wouldn't even know it.

Good thing he is my brother.

I change tactics.

"Where the fuck where you? You bailed out last night. I had to invoke Rule 9, banish two fuckers and pass out. How do you know about Aro and what he wants with us?"

"I was here."

"And?"

Silence.

He evades making eye contact.

What the fuck?

"I wasn't alone. I was with someone."

"A skank, that nurse Carmen finally finagled her way into your pants... You better have used condoms man, she looks like she gets around."

"SHUT UP! It wasn't Carmen. It was Esme Platt, a nurse from NICU. She is recently divorced and well I'm single. I don't need to explain to you who I take and fuck in my fucking apartment."

"Oookay, chill out Carl. Emmett is right you need to spank the monkey more, and this is even after getting some. Did you at least come once? Or were too out of practice and came on contact?"

This earns me a right jab, that causes me to fall right back.

"It turns out I'm fucking Esme, have right were I want her, tied up to the bed-frame and someone starts banging at the door. I thought it was one of you fuckers, that had forgotten their key. So I go and open the door as I am. Its Felix. He has a message for you. They found a place to hold the tournament, five guys each side. One night. Oh and that I'm wanted for my services, 'cause their Uncle Aro wants to have a private physician. Stellar news."

"You answered the door naked? Classic, Carl."

"Did you listen? A tournament. Five guys. One night. EXPLAIN NOW."

"To make the story short... Emmett has a hard-on for a Volturi chick. She's the tall blonde you have treated at the ER, the one you reset her wrist, 'cause she fell down. Well, she's with Demetri. Emmett hates Demetri and now he wants his woman too. The problem was he said he could fight him and win, just like he does every-night at... Fight Club.

Yes, I fucking broke his nose, and he isn't dead 'cause he is like my brother. Even though we don't share blood, he has my back, and I have his. No need to rub it more in his face. He thinks with his dick and he knows it. He wants to save her, he sees what we all see, she gets beaten up by Demetri. The tournament idea was sprung as a way for him to win the woman from Demetri. Felix was sent to scout and see our system, we had to agree to his presence. He fights like everybody else.

And now you have to reprimand me, since by explaining I've broken the Rule."

Carl snarls.

"Get your ass up, take a fucking shower you stink, and then I need to check you over. Don't think I forgot you went unconscious again. I'm gonna get a neuro consult. This worries him greatly, Ed. You could be doing irreparable damage, once you lose brain capacity that's it. You don't want to be a vegetable the rest of your life?"

I walk away.

"Hey, did you find that Isabella woman you were asking for? Or do I have to add a psychiatrist's appointment as well?"

"Funny Carl. She is real, Emmett saw her. He calls her Bella."

"Do you remember..."

I shake my head.

His frown gets more pronounced.

I feel a throbbing on my temple.

I don't tell him.

I just ignore it for the moment.

A shower sounds good.

Maybe she will come again.


	20. I want to fucking bite them

Thankfully, Carl gets called in.

So no mother-hen brother after my every move.

I feel a bit better.

I take the pills he left for me.

No one would know we used to take anything we got our hands on.

It was out of necessity.

We needed to escape our reality.

Or perish.

Jas is probably the only one of us that can tolerant massive amounts of narcotics and not stumble or slur.

I go looking for my antique beaten up Volvo.

No one thinks to steal it, but its a hand me down.

Carl now drives a Mercedes.

No new car for me.

He doesn't trust me, thinks I will crash it as soon as I'm able.

I leave Seattle, and go back to Port Angeles.

I need to find Riley.

I have a job for him.

"What's up, Masen?"

He is always up beat.

Even after I have punched his face in.

"I need you to tail Felix. Make sure he doesn't see you. I need to know his routine. You report to me, understand?"

"Yes."

I drive around.

I know what I'm looking for...

Brown long hair.

Brown eyes.

C cup tits.

Great fucking ass.

Where is she?

Not at the bar.

I don't see her midget friend either.

My stomach decides to remind me I haven't eaten, don't remember how long...

There's this diner beside a small bookstore.

Its better than nothing.

Not much traffic inside.

Better, I don't have tolerance for crowds.

I take a bench seat.

The table is sticky and so it the menu.

I don't have to wait long.

And small world, midget is my waitress.

"Hi, my name is Alice, welcome to Sassy's Diner, what would you like to... oh"

"I would like the address of your friend, the one you call Bella."

"Why would I do that? I don't know you, you could be a serial killer or a rapist. Give me your order and be on your way."

I have to say, that midget astonished me with her sudden backbone.

Our first encounter she had been meek and evasive.

Now she was a tigress protecting her cub.

"Look, really need to contact Isabella. I need to ask her a few questions and... No, I'm not a serial killer. No, I don't have a job and live with two other guys and sometimes my brother crashes there. The point is I NEED to SPEAK to Isabella.

Understand?"

She turns and goes to tend to another table.

I fume in silence.

But it seems the stars have aligned in my favor.

In comes Isabella, all disheveled and flushed.

I get hard instantly.

This woman has the power to turn me on just with her presence.

"Anthony?"

There's that name again.

Only Carl and my mates know.

I've never gone by it.

I stand and she shyly walks towards me.

What does she have to be coy now...

"Oh my what's happened to your face? Did you get mugged? Port Angeles is getting worse. That is why my fa... Never mind. I'll shut up now."

She's adorable.

And she's worried about me.

I want to take her in my arms and run away.

What have you done to me, Isabella?

She stares and a lovely blush graces her cheeks.

I want to fucking bite them.

And her nipples.

And her clit.

Fuck.

"Anthony? Are you in pain?"

Yeah, come over and make it better.

Shit, fucked doesn't cover it.


	21. And she's out of my life

"Oh my your hands... those long fingers... why did you let them get hurt?

Anthony, are you in some kind of trouble?"

I just stare.

She is real.

I'm not insane.

Okay, that's debatable.

I still don't remember how I met Isabella.

I only have this images... of us fucking.

I want to do them all over again.

And again.

"Anthony?"

"Why do you call me Anthony?"

"That's your name. Anthony Masen."

Isabella frowns.

Her nose twitches.

I want to lick the ridges.

Clearly, I've lost my balls in the last five minutes.

"And we met where exactly?"

The frown turns into a glare.

Oh, shit.

"You don't remember? That's rich. Are you a man-whore? Alice was right. You are going to break my heart. Just for your information, Mr. I-don't-fucking-know-your-real-name, I'm no slut. Thanks for nothing, asshole. Next time we cross pass, it would be best if you keep pretending you don't remember me."

She gets up.

Hisses into my face.

"You may have been the best lay I've ever had, but I have self-respect."

Not before, licking my jaw.

I fucking whimper.

"Later, Alice."

And she's out of my life.

Fuck, it hurts.


	22. As if I'm underwater

I am a fucking idiot.

Yeah, smart move.

Just blurt out you don't remember her...

But you can taste her skin on your tongue.

You can feel her mouth on your cock, swallowing you whole.

I needed to get myself in check, or I was sure I would get arrested for indecent exposure.

It wasn't all though.

Something inside was trying to claw itself out.

The logical thing to do was to follow her.

And beg.

The thing is I don't fucking beg.

Never.

Here I was drowning.

My reason for coming to this shit-hole was gone.

There was no way I was going to be able to eat anything in my state.

My head started to throb.

It felt like an ice pick was going to take my eye out.

I felt nauseated.

Oh, fuck.

I think I'm finally dying.

I'm barely able to see, but I'm moving.

Midget is getting loud.

I tell her to shut the fuck up.

My head feels like its ready to blow up.

I try to take my phone out of my pocket, but it fumbles out of my reach.

What happens after that is just bits and pieces.

Blurry images really.

As if I'm underwater.

Then darkness.

His voice.

I did say he was my counterpart in many ways.

He is fierce, but tender-hearted.

He takes care of me, without expecting anything in return.

Who does that?

Not even people you consider family would do it.

I'm in his room.

The light hurts my eyes.

He has natural sunlight from the windows he has uncovered.

So different from my room that looks like a cave, dark and gloomy.

I clear my throat.

"Shh... don't try to talk. I think you did some damage to your chords."

He looks into my eyes.

I look back.

I can see my sorrow reflected back.

Now whatever was trying to escape is out and about.

"Masen how I've missed you."

Jas touches his lips to my top lip, tentatively.

I take his bottom, and tug it playfully.

I let it go, and he proceeds to lick it.

I attack his mouth.

Biting and tasting.

He gives back, plunging his tongue in my mouth.

Shirts thrown off.

Good thing we are in our boxers and get quickly discarded.

His hand goes right for the price.

"Shit, Jas you really do miss me."

He lets himself fall back in the bed.

I know what he wants.

Without too much fuss.

I need him.

Tears.

My forehead lies on top of his.

When I look into his eyes, he sees something.

"I'm here... "

I thrust.

A deep exhale.

His hands take hold of my shoulders.

I pull out.

He pulls me back in.

I groan.

It feels good, but something is missing.

This used to be enough.

My stomach feels full of lead.

"Masen look into my eyes. Remember."

Remember?

I get flashes.

We are young punks.

We survived together.

We got beaten up together.

We got abused together.

It's too much.

A sob escapes me.

I'm no longer able to keep the pace.

I stay inside him, where is safe.

He just holds me.

His arms never leave me.

"She must be very special to have fucked you so bad. I think I've found mine, Masen. She is a contradiction in terms. A small package full of bursting energy. Will she understand us? I can only hope. 'Cause you are my first love, will always be."

I tuck my head on his shoulder, trying to hide the tracts of my tears.

It's useless.

They have mingled with his.


	23. The day I lost my balls to Isabella

Light is dimmer.

I'm face down on the mattress.

Jas has his legs entwined with mine and is practically half on top of me.

Slightly snoring.

I drag my face on the bed-sheet.

So this again.

Another episode of lost time.

I remember midget and her grating voice.

The blistering pain.

Dry heaving.

This is just getting better and better.

I need to get ink.

I have this tradition.

Every time I've cried, the date gets to be inked on my back.

Jas knows each of those dates.

The Cullen Crest rests on my back also.

Under it, lies the date that changed my life forever.

Carl has is own mark for it too.

A bleeding heart.

Only women and us know where it is.

Yeah, it's kind of in a place, you must have seen him naked.

He is just badass.

I told him, he would've have gotten written on his pelvic bone "suck my cock".

That would've gotten him all those slutty nurses waiting in line to serve Dr. Cullen.

I do have a problem... what is today's date?

Jas turns in his sleep and it gives me the opportunity to leave the bed.

It doesn't really bother me that I've been in his bed.

Tears shed.

I need to mark this date.

Something got lost.

A take a quick shower.

Jas wakes, gives he one of his lopsided grins.

His eyes still hold a sadness.

I stare at the floor.

I noticed my clothes thrown haphazardly all over the floor.

We were some needy fuckers.

I pick up my stuff.

As I stand and take my leave, he comes close to my back.

He traces my back with one finger.

I know he is looking for the place.

He stops.

There.

We are on our we to the tattoo parlor.

Some chick with a piercing fetish is getting a tramp stamp of angel wings.

Typical.

"Hey Eddie, long time since I've seen you here. Thought you had found another place to get your ink. How is that motherfucker bother of yours? Did you finally convinced him to get his cock pierced? I swear I thought he was going to kill you with his eyes. Any-who, what are you getting? Oh, hey Jasper, how you doing?"

Sam was a bit of bitch.

Becoming a father, has made him lose his edge.

He was one of the originals.

The man had a left hook that once it hit you, no chance you would get the upper hand.

He was more Carl's friend.

I just liked the fact it was close by and he did good ink work.

His son, Seth has a big crush on me.

He is close to eight years old.

Jasper just nods back.

"How's Seth? And Emily? Is she still trying to get knocked up?"

Sam makes a face.

Subject closed.

Is not like I give shit.

It's not my business.

Just small talk.

"I want today's date scribbled right under the latest date."

This would be the fifth date.

The day I lost my balls to Isabella.

Sam nods.

He doesn't pry.

"Take a seat, I'll call you when I'm ready."

Jas puts his hand on my shoulder.

A reassuring touch.

A whisper...

I'm here.

He always is.

"I want you to meet Alice."

_Alice._

Could it be the very same?

Jasper's secret lover is midget?

You've got to be kidding me...

I turn my gaze.

He is all smiley.

I just chuckle.

The dwarf with almost a shaved head.

Midget.

"Sure. I'll meet your Alice."

Where is Alice, there's my Isabella.


	24. A sense of deja vu overcomes me

I feel refreshed.

It happens every time I get ink.

It's like a cleansing ritual, a process to express something that has marked me in some way.

The Cullen Crest is to remember from where I came from.

In way to honor the parents I had, the life I would've had.

Carl doesn't talk about them.

If you think on the stages of grief, he never left denial.

A bleeding heart is the true symbol of his pain.

He only has me.

But am I worth saving?

With no surprise, Jasper gives me the directions to the diner.

He tries to pretend he isn't nervous, but I see through the façade.

He wants my approval.

And to be truthful, if I wanted to fuck his Alice, he would let me.

Good thing I don't.

If it was the other way around... Isabella is mine.

Jas does have a point, will they accept the fact we do fuck on occasion?

Maybe I'm getting concerned over nothing...

Who knows what Anthony Masen told Bella...

Fuck what's her last name?

Midget will tell after she buries me in the backyard.

Hopefully, Jas presence will mellow her out.

She is waiting outside, keeps looking towards the bookstore.

"Wait here, okay? I'll get her. Try to be... um... nice, for me, please."

I glare at his back.

It's as if he can sense the hostility between Midget and I.

As he approaches, she practically jumps right there; attached her mouth and takes hold of his hair.

A sense of déjà vu overcomes me.

"Are you stalking me now, Anthony?"

I'm startled from my weirdness by no other than my Isabella.

And I realize I've called her as mine.

In my non-sensical state of mind I've declared the possession of a woman I don't remember meeting...

But do remember fucking her brains out.

"No... Jas was picking up his... girl."

She swivels her head towards the affectionate couple, embraced in their own bubble.

I frown.

I've never felt neglected by Jas, but right in this moment, I feel totally alone.

He has his midget, that he can easy carry.

She pecks his lips, looking adoringly into his hazel eyes.

His gaze transfixed.

Isabella huffs.

Annoyance written all over her face.

I want to bite her lovely pout.

"Don't approve of the new couple? Jas is convince she is it for him, you know?"

"Alice believes Jasper is her perfect soul mate. Please... Aren't we old enough to know better? Where is my Prince Charming? I'm no Princess stuck in a tower, or sleeping for a hundred years. I'm a living, breathing, hot-blooded woman, with specific needs. I don't have the time or the patience to wait to weed out the garbage in the meantime.

For example, I thought you were pretty close to perfection, but clearly I was too drunk when I made such judgement. Don't misunderstand, there's nothing wrong with dick, and how you use it. No... your problem is... Fuck you got me talking to you, sneaky devious bastard. And know I want to take you to that alley and fuck you against the wall. Wanna?"

We are both facing the diner, leaning on the piece of shit Volvo I drive.

I clear my throat.

I readjust my cock, that is trying to fuck it self out the seam.

I look directly into her eyes.

Darkest pools into her soul.

She has been hurt, but she doesn't know hell.

Apprehension sets into my gut.

What right do I have in taking Isabella into my world?

Is lust enough of a valid reason?

Is the possibility of love?

Her face gets closer.

I look at her lips.

She intently searches for something in my eyes.

"You have the most amazing green eyes I've ever seen, it was your eyes that drew me to you. You kept staring intently at me. I wanted to crawl out of my skin. Fuck, you kindled a fire inside me from across the room. I didn't question my actions, I just let my instincts take me... they led me to you and your amazing eyes. You wouldn't take them off me. Nothing would take your attention, as if I was the only person that existed in your world. Not even that big guy you hang out with could deter you.

How could I not fall into your web?

Don't break me.

'Cause I'm already yours."

I'm left without breath.

Her hands take hold of my face, tracing carefully my wounds.

Whispering she says, "I'll help you remember, it's there beneath the surface, your eyes let me know. They recognize all we have done to each other."

"Edward?"

Jas looks perplexed.

I don't blame him.

I'm baffled by this turn of events.

Isabella just this very same day had banished me from her life, and now she was practically professing her devotion towards me.

I suddenly felt like I most be dreaming, I'm still lying in Jasper's bed.

Too many hits to my frontal lobe have compromised my faculties.

"Masen, we need to get Alice and her friend back to their apartment and then we need to meet up with Carl and Em."

He is waiting for an explanation.

"Bella let's go. My feet are killing me and I need to take a shower. I have to take off the smell of fried food from my skin. Ugh! I need to find a better paying job..."

Isabella ignores midget.

Her eyes directed at Jasper.

Her perception is uncanny.

It's as if she can detect something is left unsaid.

She reads body language, and now Jasper is speaking volumes.

He still holds Alice's hand, but his stance is erect, as if ready to attack.

Old habits will never die.

"Jasper you know Isabella?"

"She is Alice's best friend. How do you know Bella?"

I know her in the biblical sense.

Awkwardness emanates from everyone.

Midget decides to give her two cents.

"Anthony or whatever his name is, met Isabella at that new club that opened last weekend in Seattle. She hasn't stopped talking about him since. But today, she found out he didn't remember their encounter, a big disappointment and the reason we are leaving now. Bella, come on."

A club?

Probably Emmett's idea of fun.

"No, Alice, you are not my mother. I don't need you to protect me and I won't go with you..."

I interrupt the spat, 'cause I'm losing my patience.

"Jasper, call Carl and let him know I'm out tonight. He can lead without me. Take midget out and have a good one."

Without anymore of an explanation, I take Isabella's hand and walk way.

Towards that alley.


	25. The barriers between us are gone

My Isabella is a walking contradiction.

In the same fucking day she has insulted, assaulted, propositioned and declared her intentions...

Fuck, this woman drives me crazy.

And I plan to follow through on her plan.

There's the wall.

Her back hits it.

A gasp escapes her.

It doesn't stop me.

Driven.

Wild.

So beautiful.

The barriers between us are gone.

Ripped.

She is bare to my eyes.

I fall to my knees.

Astonishment colors her face.

Her taste on my mouth isn't enough.

I bite her clit.

She screams.

I shake my head in disapproval.

No need to bring attention of unwanted passerby's.

I stand once again.

She opens my button fly, one at a time.

Fucking teasing me with her fingers.

I growl.

She shudders.

Enough.

"I Want You the Fuck Now!"

I proceed to take what is mine.

Her open legs help my grip, as she positions herself astride my hips.

"Mine. Mine. Mine..."

It becomes a mantra, over and over.

To claim.

To take.

I thrust and groan.

My mouth attached to her vulnerable neck.

Isabella tugs my hair as if it's what hold her together, or else she will disappear.

"More... I want more. Ahh... fuck me damn you!"

I push her against the wall, and gyrate against her pelvis.

The contact, makes her contract against my cock.

"You better not come yet, you hear? Or I'll punish you, you dirty girl."

I bit her engorged nipple through her blouse.

I leave a wet spot behind.

I should probably do the other one.

Symmetrical.

She tries to move, to flex her hips against me.

I take hold of her hips, and ram into her without mercy.

"MASEN!"

I plunge my tongue into her mouth, to silence her cries.

Nothing compares.

Only to the glimpses of us.

The snapshots of a not so distant past.

I don't need anything else.

No air.

No water.

No food.

Just Isabella.

Out of breath, she moves her head back, searching for it.

I can see my teeth embedded on her skin.

I get satisfaction from the sight.

Her eyes connect with mine.

Another push, closer to completion.

My lips trace her face until they touch her ear.

"You belong to me. As I belong to you."

Her hold gets tighter.

Her wetness drips between us.

Her mouth bites into my shoulder, as she let's go.

I follow right after.

I exhale, trying to control the need to fucking sob.

This I will remember.

"Mine."

"Yours."


	26. Mine to fuck, mine to take, mine to love

I'm seriously drunk.

Drunk on her.

I can't recall how we got to this bed.

But I don't mind it at all.

She lies on top, her head on my chest.

I must have fallen asleep.

This creature has me in her grasp.

And curiously I don't want to leave.

I wonder if we are in her home.

Where is her home?

She takes little bites and nibbles.

She knows I'm already awake.

She proceeds to use her tongue on the ridges of my chest.

I want that somewhere down south.

Her eyes are shining, as if they had their own light source.

I want her this happy for the rest of my life.

I take hold of her disheveled mane, something that seems typical in her.

I love it.

I direct her movements.

Down.

As she almost there.

She pushes off.

I growl my discontent.

"Nuh oh, Masen you know do as I say..."

Oh, what the fuck?

What did I say?

She has my balls.

I glare at her antics.

I want my cock sucked.

And then she just knows how to flabbergasted me into submission.

She turns on her hands and knees... and fucking shakes her ass.

Can you blame me?

"Get the fuck over here!"

Oh, yeah that will get my balls back.

She moves forward and I just yank her right back.

"I'm gonna ride you, my Isabella... 'cause you are mine. Mine to fuck, mine to take, mine to love."

She turns her face.

Her eyes are searching for the veracity of my statement.

I don't give it much thought.

I take hold of my cock.

I tease her.

She shudders.

I plunge.

And I just can't stop.

Will I ever get sated?

"Mine, Isabella. SAY IT."

She whimpers.

I'm giving what she asked for.

My hand moves towards her hair and I tug it.

"ANSWER ME!"

"FUCK ME!"

"I'm fucking you..."

I slow rhythm.

Isabella gets pissed.

"YOURS you bastard!"

I ram myself again.

And nibble on her shoulder.

I want her taste in my mouth.

The saltiness of her sweat.

The smell of her skin.

She starts pushing back.

Contracting on my cock.

The rush starts and I let go.

I bite harder.

Isabella screams her release.

Nothing is more beautiful.

A beautiful ride indeed.

But nothing good last forever.

And my past has come to hunt me.

"Hey Masen, remember me?"


	27. If he hurts her, I might as well be dead

He grabs me by the hair and tears me away from Isabella.

So the bastard had the cojones to follow through.

"You think you are so tough, eh? Where is your brother now? Or that muscle man-boy? Or your lover? Where are they now? You are nothing."

His tactic was just plain bullying.

He slams me to the wall.

Laurent has Isabella.

She is disturbingly quiet.

He takes his time manhandling her.

I'm dying.

If he hurts her, I might as well be dead.

Get it together.

Don't lose focus.

"Nothing to say? All suddenly so quiet. You think you can disrespect me in front of my woman, you rejected piece of shit! I know where you came from. Don't you remember, MASEN? Too many hits into that head of yours?"

I stiffen in place, instead of struggling in his hold.

He holds a knife close to my carotid artery.

If I was alone I would risk it.

But I won't let Isabella be brutalized at the hands of these motherfuckers.

How I regret not killing them.

Originally, my plan for Fight Club was to gather men, willing to do what other wouldn't.

Meaning we would clean up what society just washed over, put a band-aid on.

I knew from experience what that neglect could damage you irreparably.

You are an orphan, nobody wants you.

Only sick fuckers with teenage boy fetishes.

Phil came into mind.

I could see Carl held down.

12-14-2000, that date marked on my back.

The day something was taken from Carl and I.

Part of me was already gone, but that even just bled out my innocence.

My right to dream.

"Do you remember me now? At Seaside Group Home for Boys, how much fun we older boys had with you skinny, scrawny little fuckers... How I enjoyed fucking that ass of yours? Remember Jamie now, Masen?"

He thought he could intimidate me, control me, and gain my submission.

He was wrong.

"I see you have a new boyfriend and a new bitch. Need to cover all bases, so no one can suspect you like cock as much as pussies like to get fucked..."

He snarls and pokes harder with the knife.

"Want to see me fuck your new girlfriend? She is kind of hot, and I liked her moves, had you panting like a little bitch for her... Doesn't she know you fuck that Jazzy boy? That you have history going back... a fucking decade. That he only has eyes for you, a lap dog waiting for his treat."

I let him talk.

I need to get loose.

I have to save Isabella.

And kill these fuckers.

I make eye contact with her.

Tears flow down her face.

Her fear is clear.

I look for disgust.

There isn't any.

I think I... love her even more.

"Let her get dressed. She isn't the reason you are here. I am. So whatever you do, you do it to me."

"No please? Don't. You never beg, not even then. Always took it all, in silence. Made me want... Fuck."

He pushes me harder against the wall.

I don't want her to see this.

There's no going back once you see someone get raped or getting attacked yourself.

My vision is getting blurry again.

The pain inside my skull increases.

I can't blackout.

Not now.

The knife slithers down my back.

He uses his leg to spread my legs.

I use this as my moment to act.

Rage.

Hate.

Disgust.

Revenge.

It all fuels my determination.

My head hits him right in between the eyes and he stumbles back.

Isabella takes initiative and bites Laurent's arm.

I deck him easily, with his previous injuries he doesn't stand a chance.

James is recuperating.

He slashes my arm.

It doesn't deter me.

I kick him right in the nuts and he goes down.

Shaking my head, "Jamie, Jamie... drugged up you come to take me down. Who is the pussy now?"

I push him and he falls flat on the floor.

I straddle his chest and choke him with one hand.

"I should make you blow my fucking cock. Remember, Jamie? 'Cause I fucking do, you sick fuck. Didn't know you wanted me so much, and jealous of Jasper..."

I chuckle.

Isabella gets dressed, but her eyes don't leave my sight.

"Ma..Masen, please."

She wants this over.

I hold him tighter.

"I should kill you. No one threatens my Isabella. No one touches her, but me. NO ONE."

Nothing is stopping me from wringing his neck.

So easy.

I hear the click.

"YOU MUST DIE!"

"FUCK, Edward, STOP THE FUCK NOW! Em take Laurent, Jasper get control over Edward. Riley get the girl, we need to get the hell out of here, before the cops come."

"BELLA! Are you okay?"

Carl is here.

"Edward, stop."

I don't fucking want to.

"MASEN! I said STOP."

I reluctantly release his neck.

James seems unresponsive.

I don't give a fuck.

Jamie can rot in hell, I'll be seeing him there soon.

"Get fucking dressed. Let's move!"

Like a five-star general, Carl's orders get done.

As I get my dispersed clothes, I feel a small hand on my shoulder.

It traces my ink.

I suddenly feel dread.

I can't lose her.

"So much pain... I can't imagine."

"I don't want your pity. I want your love."

"What makes you think you don't already have it?"

I close my eyes, as she continues to peruse my back.

"The dates have meanings... someday you'll tell. But we have to go, Alice has gone ballistic at the state of her apartment."

I finally turn.

Her eyes don't evade or look at the cheap vinyl floor.

Her gaze penetrates inside my very soul.

"You don't need to hide, Edward. You are beautiful."

It's the first time she calls me Edward.

And I've lost my balls again.

Beautiful?


	28. She wants me to bare my soul

Turns out having Riley on my side was very good investment.

What I don't understand is... how did he know where I was...

And that I was in gonna get my ass kicked by that degenerate.

It doesn't matter right this very moment.

'Cause right at this very moment, Carl is giving the death glare.

Em is pretending to be coughing, when in fact is laughing... at me.

Jas is being Jas, I know he worries for me, and is still unsure.

His eyes search my gaze, he wants reassurance that I'm fine.

He knows more than he speaks.

But none of it matters, as Isabella holds my hands and touches them with so much care.

As if they will break with any pressure, maybe that's how she sees me.

Breakable.

Vulnerable.

As if she can listen to where my thoughts have gone, she smiles.

Beautiful.

Fuck, this woman doesn't know what she it means.

She blindly has come within my grasp.

I fear I'll be the one to break her.

She deserves better.

Someone that's not broken or vulnerable.

"Edward? I need you to visit the hospital again. No excuses are acceptable. And no fighting. You need to heal. I'm sorry, ah Isabella is it? I'm Carlisle Cullen, this dickhead's brother. I'm very glad to meet you."

"Hi, everyone, you can call me Bella. This Alice, she's my best friend."

Midget stands up abruptly.

"Bella, let's go you need to call your dad or he will get worried and come to my apartment. That would be very bad... Nice to have met you all. Jas called me later, okay? Bye."

With that she intends to take my Isabella.

"Alice would you give a few minutes? I need to speak with... Edward, please?"

That Midget has the nerve to huff and turns towards the entryway.

I wish she would just leave.

Her moves and her eyes connect with mine, I just stare back.

Yeah, want to fight me Midget?

Not even Jas will stop me.

She rolls her eyes.

I have to stop myself from laughing.

Em would love to see that.

A midget taking me down.

Isabella stands, still holding my hand.

I comply and stand as well.

All eyes are on us, transfixed by the turn of events.

Isabella seems overwhelmed by the attention and I hiss in their direction.

I feel animalistic, as if ruled by instincts that say I've to protect my mate.

She is a woman in a room full of men.

I have to stake claim to what is mine.

Her touch diffuses the growing rage.

Her hand slithers through my arm.

"Where is your room?"

Then ducks her head and fucking blushes.

It's adorable and annoying at the same time.

This woman, just a few hours ago, was asking to be fucked hard from behind.

And now gets all shy when asking where my room is...

Isabella is an enigma I need to discover.

She never does what is typically expected.

Carl clears his throat loudly.

"After Isabella leaves, I want to speak with you Edward."

In other words, no sex, talk with the woman and then come back.

I give him the nod and almost risk giving him the finger.

Asshole.

I'm sure if the pretty nurse Esme would be here, he would be all over that.

"So this is my room, as you can see is a fucking mess..."

"Masen, what just happened... I'm sorry but I don't understand. I want you to trust me, once you are ready. I'm not going to push you... Please don't think it changes what I feel for you. I do want to be with you. But you need to be honest with me, or this won't work."

Honesty?

Suddenly I don't feel so good.

She wants me to bare my soul.

To trust.

That is something I don't do easily.


	29. Hard as a fucking rock

We seat side by side, on my bed.

The seconds tick by.

Midget must be fidgeting and getting annoying.

Jas must be pacing.

Em is probably scavenging his next meal.

And Carl, my dear brother must be fuming.

I can imagine the steam coming out of his ears.

Always wanting to be in control.

"I want to trust you, Isabella. But what you want... it takes time, time we don't have right this very moment, as you can see I have a very pissed off brother. And..."

"What is wrong with you? He seems really worried about your health..."

"Don't fret, he is just a mother hen. I'm all he's got, and he is a doctor after all."

"Okay. I want you to tell me about your tattoo, the significance of the dates..."

A sucked a breath.

Right into the gut she goes.

"Never mind. You need to speak with your brother and friends. I need to go with Alice, before she looses her cool and barges in here, wouldn't be proper not to get her way. Jasper has his hands full with her, is all I'm saying."

She stands ready to leave and I take hold of her hand.

"Bella... the dates are milestones in my life, moments I don't and can't forget, events that changed my life forever."

I take off my shirt and turn my back to her.

I want to trust you, my Isabella.

Her hands touch slowly.

She traces the Cullen crest.

"This is your family's heritage. You want to remember your origin, you had a family, a name..."

My heart rate accelerates and my breathing increases.

"The first date? Is the day of your birth, right? June 20, 1986. The second is... actually my birthday, September 13, 2000."

My throat is incredibly dry.

"It was the day my parents died in a car accident. I was barely fourteen, and Carl was seventeen. Life changed in the matter of minutes. We were wards of the state, Carl for the next eight months, and me until my eighteen birthday. No one took us in, so the Child Services found us a foster home. Phil and Irina were supposed to be the best option... an alcoholic and a sick perverted fuck. The next date... it started the downward spiral that became our lives. Phil raped Carl, he overpowered him and did it right in front of me. December 14, 2000. Ten days before Christmas. Carl wanted to protect me and take it all himself, but Phil wanted his share of the Cullen boys. He used our compliance to keep us in check, he knew we would protect each other. It was an oath of silence."

Isabella is silently crying, her forehead rests on my back and her arms comes around my chest.

She kisses the dates, as that would make it better.

I just keep going.

"The third date, October 15, 2002, it's when I met Jasper. I had been from group home to group home, fighting and surviving, already wearing my battle scars proudly. Jasper was no different from me, we were both just young punks, who found each other in that hell hole. Carl was trying to survive on his own, make a future for himself, so then he could take me, or else they wouldn't let him have my custody. If it wasn't for Jas, I probably would be dead so many times. He knows me better than anyone, and I don't keep any secrets from him."

She touches over that date.

"You... love him, don't you? And he loves you, his eyes tell it so. It's more than just friendship, though."

I feel a lump in my throat.

Are we that transparent?

I try to turn around, she stops me.

"Don't. I think this way it will be easier for you."

"We have been lovers these past ten years. I can't explain it to you. It just is. I need him in my life and he needs me in his. Are we gay? I don't believe in labels, to conform to society's need to compartmentalize everyone into categories. I'm a man, I fuck and I bleed, just like anybody else. And now you are all I want, Isabella. This is my honesty, this is me trusting you."

She kisses the date, her lips stay in place.

"You have a new date, recently inked... What is the importance of that one?"

"You."

"Me? Why me? We didn't meet... Oh."

I can imagine the blush covering her upper body.

I want to taste and bite every inch of her skin.

"You tattooed your body to remember the date I called you out? Only you, Masen. Only you."

Only for you, my Isabella.

A knock on the door.

"Bella, can you hurry up, please. We need to go back to the apartment."

Midget is getting on my nerves.

Isabella kisses my neck.

And whispers in my ear.

"Wouldn't mind seeing you two boys loving each other... while I'm right there. Food for thought, eh? Later, Masen."

Hard as a fucking rock.

That is what she does to me.

And then fucking leaves.


	30. I want to live for her and for him

What comes after isn't much better.

A fucking Intervention episode is what finds me.

"Edward take a seat and shut the fuck up. I can see you are dying to argue and I don't give a fuck, right the fuck now."

Like the fuck word, there my dear brother.

Don't fucking overuse it, or it might lose its meaning.

I humor him and take a seat.

Em looks like he wants to bolt, any second now he'll make some lame excuse.

Jas still looks troubled, like my burden is his to bear.

I roll my eyes.

"It has come to my attention that you keep losing consciousness, and those fucks at the hospital must have done a mistake. I will conduct the examination and tests myself. I need to see for myself that you are healthy, as you try to imply, when clearly something is seriously wrong. You could be...bleeding internally inside your brain and that might be the cause of the blackouts, loss of consciousness and maybe other symptoms you have kept to yourself. A subdural hematoma is a real medical emergency, and may need surgery immediately."

Jas snaps out of his pensive state.

"He may die if left untreated? We must go now. No fucking buts or nos from you, Edward. This is fucking serious. Em help me get him into the car and Carl can drive us."

"What about Fight Club? I'm out, but you guys need to run it tonight. I'll just stay here."

"The fuck you are! You will get up and probably end up at Isabella's doorstep and then have a fucking seizure and die. I can't lose you...I just can't live in a world you are not in... Please for me, just let Carl do the test."

Em stares into my eyes willing my compliance.

Carl is ready at the door with keys at hand.

So we are really going to the hospital...I may be dying as we speak.

Does it scare me?

No.

But then I think of brown eyes, looking into my soul...

I want to live for her...and for him.

Jas deserves happiness and my death will only destroy his world.

"Fine. I'll go, just to appease you. I'm sure its nothing, some rest and not fighting every fucking night will fix it."

I was acting nonchalant, but I could see Carl was tense and kept clenching his fists.

If I was out as a fighter, the Volturi were not going to be pleased and our lives would be in jeopardy.

I had been so wrapped up in Isabella, that I had forgotten we have those fuckers after us.

If a brain hemorrhage didn't kill me, Carl would.


	31. I start to question everything

"What's the verdict?"

"Em this isn't a trial, for fuck's sake."

Em is aggravating, most of the time, now he is pissing off Jas, which so unlike him.

"Well, what's the diagnosis, Dr. Cullen?"

Carl is quiet.

Em looses all the joy from his face.

Jas takes my hand.

Somehow I didn't notice his presence beside me.

"Carl? Say something."

"Will you all just shut the hell up! We aren't even supposed to be here...I can be fired because of this. Not following the rightful protocol..."

"YOU ARE FUCKING STALLING! Get on with it! Am I dying? Brain is going to explode in five seconds? What?"

"Edward...You need surgery. There is blood accumulating inside your brain and it needs to drained or you'll get an intense pain, as you put it your brain will explode. The pressure needs to be released and the blood has to come out, a hole has to be drilled into your skull. You need brain surgery, happy now?"

Em seats in the nearest chair, as if the air has been take out of the room.

Jasper's hand clenches harder on mine, willing me to comply to accept my fate.

"Say yes. You fucking do this now. Say it! SAY IT!"

"Calm down, Jasper. He will do as I say, I'm his big brother. He will be prepped and ready for surgery tomorrow. You are going to be admitted tonight. Come, let's leave him be for a few minutes. We need to coordinate who will stay with him."

And they leave...on my own.

To stew over the fact that, yes there is something wrong.

I start to question everything.

Did I really see Isabella today? Or was it yesterday?

Am I hallucinating even now?

My vision gets blurry and my head starts to pound.

I feel like my body is trying to speak.

But then Carl didn't say shit about hematoma causing hallucinations.

Is that all on me, then?

Is the memory loss caused by it too?

I try to think back when exactly did I first saw Isabella, and I can't.

Fear settles over me.

It feels like what is real isn't.

I look at my hands.

Yes, they are my hands, right?

I stand up, and almost collapse right back.

I feel sick and dizzy.

But I need to see my reflection.

I need to see that I am me.

I suddenly understand that crazy chick from Girl, Interrupted.

This is an episode of depersonalization.

And the craving to claw my body off, is not foreign to me now.

Next thing I'm conscious about is that I'm at the meeting.

And I'm next up to fight... Jacob Black.

Fuck my life.


	32. This has to be a fucking dream

Jake is sneering.

I try to regain my footing.

I feel like I can stumble at the mere touch.

Fuck, how did I get here?

Everything is hazy.

I rub my face, as if it help make me wake up.

This has to be a fucking dream.

Carl gives the signal.

No turning back, this is actually happening.

I'm not backing out, no pussy here.

Jas is leaning against the wall, looking at the disgusting cement floor.

Em is trying to give me pointers.

As if I need them... I'll tip over as soon as the first hit gets me.

I nod.

Jake walks forward.

Ready to strike.

I try to move, but my body doesn't cooperate.

It's as if I'm stuck in place.

I feel her presence.

She walks in, like its meant to be.

A smile graces her face.

My Isabella.

That distraction gives Jake the advantage he needs.

"Hey Masen, I've been dying to this..."

Right in the stomach.

I cough up blood.

Blood is spattered on the floor.

Jas glares my way.

He looks pissed I've gotten blood on it.

Carl comes to me.

"Masen you are dead. You are dead."

Isabella watches from a far.

She's leaving me here.

In this Hell.

When I look towards Jake, he isn't there...

I'm there...

A replica of me.

"You are dead."

My heart feels like it's about to burst.

My breathing accelerates to the point I'm hyperventilating.

Darkness fills my vision.

But the voice still speaks.

"You are dead."


	33. My Isabella is fucking perfect

A bright light fills my vision.

A tunnel of brightness in between the dark.

Voices I hear all around me.

I must have died.

And Hell has come to collect me.

But I want and need to see my Isabella again.

I try to conjure her in my mind.

The vision is a wraith of her true likeness.

I whimper.

"I'm here, Edward. Calm yourself, I'm here."

It's her voice from above.

I feel as if I'm underwater, and she's unreachable to me.

"Isa...bella, mine. Mine. You are mine."

I hear a chuckle, that sounds so much like Em.

I hear Carl checking my vitals and giving hell to the nurse.

I can't decide if Jas in the room by his sounds, but I feel his presence.

He will never leave me, as I would never leave him if he ever needed me.

I can practically see him standing close by, his eyes never straying from my place.

Always watching.

Always caring.

Always loving.

"Yours, I'm only yours. No need to get yourself over excited. You need to rest and get better. Your family is waiting for you..."

Her voice cuts off.

"And you better not lie to me again, Edward Cullen or I might beat you until you fucking confess, injured or not."

This outburst caused the room to be filled by their laughter, even Carl's I could name.

"Edward, I need to examine you, but you need to be patient."

Patient?

Have I ever been, in my entire life?

Was there room to worry over my state?

As he did the routinely examination after post-operation.

He left to confer with another specialist.

There was some swelling that needed to go down.

And some other medical jargon I had no interest in.

The light hurt my eyes, even if it was turned down.

Em said he needed to be back to work at the workshop, so he left right after.

Jas was fidgeting in the corner, now that Isabella was sitting closer to me.

Her hand seemed incapable of leaving mine.

I guess I had taken hold of it and wasn't willing to let it go either.

"Jasper get over here. Where is midget?"

"Huh? Oh, you mean Alice? She is at work, she wanted to be here when you would wake, but her boss is an asshole. Bella got permission from her boss, Zafrina, she's the owner of the bookstore beside the diner. Well she was kind enough to let her..."

"Shut up! Come here, Jas."

He looks startled and I swear he is blushing from head to toe.

He knows I hate it when he rambles for no reason.

Of course, he doesn't know my Isabella knows the truth about us.

He comes through the other side, opposite Isabella.

"I've never been more scared in my life... I've had moments when I thought I wouldn't make it or wouldn't want to. Don't fucking do that to me again. You arrogant motherfucker..."

I take hold of his hand and somehow again purchase enough to pull him towards me.

His forehead rest on mine.

Tears are overflowing.

"I love you, Jas. You are my best friend, a brother, and the one true constant in my fucked-up life. Nothing will ever change that. Not even death. You won't get rid of me."

He moves instinctually towards my mouth.

I kiss back.

He pulls back, and looks into my eyes.

"Never."

"Holy fuck...that was one of the hottest things I've ever seen..."

We both turn.

My Isabella is flushed with arousal.

Yes, she will do fine.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I'll leave..."

"Bella... Edward is your boyfriend. You don't need to leave. Thanks...for understanding."

Now, my Isabella is crying.

"You are beautiful together... how could I get in between what has been established years ago? I hope I can experience such a connection with someone I love...that much. I can only hope."

My Isabella is fucking perfect.

And mine.


	34. I can't and won't back down

"He's gonna be fine now, right Carlisle?"

"Well, hopefully the swelling will go down and no more bleeding inside his brain. But for that to stay that way, Edward has to stop fighting. Permanently."

"How are you going to force him to stop? He lives for it...he craves it as a drug. Its his escape, his way of coping with the shit life we were dealt with."

"Jasper...I need your cooperation, and it seems Isabella has to be brought into this, to make sure Edward will accept that he can't fight anymore. Or he will die from a hit to the head. That is the awful truth."

I hear sobbing.

They think I'm asleep.

I feel annoyance at their underhanded plans.

To use Isabella against me.

It would work, of course it would.

I would do anything for her.

Even stop fighting.

But I feel like air is missing and I won't survive.

Die from a simple hit?

I've been hundreds of times and bounced back.

There has to be a way for me to continue as an part of Fight Club.

And Carl is forgetting I have to fight at the tournament...

Fuck.

Aro Volturi won't tolerate it, he wants to see the Cullen Clan fight his boys.

I can't and won't back down.

"Jasper...you need to be strong and show a united front. I know...that your relationship with Edward is closer and you know things about him that he would never tell me. Sometimes I feel like I left him all alone, to fend for himself, and I did. I had no choice. We both were fucked by the system and paid the price. Only once he could finally live with me, it was already to late. The damage was done and the Edward that my parents loved was long gone, and now stood a shattered image."

"I will do whatever is necessary to keep him safe. Even if I lose him 'cause of it. He will fucking live, Carl. He will live."

:::

Later, Carl comes into the room.

"Hey there you motherfucker, don't you look more fucked up than usual with your head half shaved off... Damn, you should just shave it all off. The neurosurgeon had to drill a hole into your head, close to the temple to drain the blood. The inner-cranial pressure was too dangerous, and no wonder you felt like your head was about to explode, 'cause it fucking was. I hope this condition doesn't develop into a chronic subdural hematoma, or else you'll be stuck with anti-seizure drugs. The doctor believes the other day, when I brought you the bleeding wasn't present, I call bullshit. But the important thing is you are well into recovery and once you are out, you will fucking rest and...no more fighting, ever."

Smooth, Carl.

"You seem to forget we have a tournament, in which I have to participate...or our lives might be in danger. We can't displease Volturi. I have to honor that commitment. There's no other way. I'll have to take the hits elsewhere, in my torso, evade."

"Are you INSANE? Didn't you hear what I just said? If you get a single hit to your fucking head, you could fucking die instantly...you have made too much damage already. You have older lesions, it's a miracle you fucking walk and talk. Think about the opportunities you have now...think of Isabella, she deserves a chance with you. And what about Jas? Have you forgotten that he lives, 'cause you breathe? Even if he has found love in that girl, he will always follow you to the ends of the Earth. I don't understand it, but I fucking respect it. So should you. I see you later, I need to see if Esme is around..."

Yeah, Esme.

Do me a favor and fuck my brother unconscious.

:::


	35. He has the balls to wink

"Hey Assward! How's the noggin? Still hurting, I bet. Want me to make it better?"

Em is a funny bastard.

But he is my friend, in the best of times and the worst of times.

It is just his way.

"It's okay. I'm alive and I'll survive this shit. Have you seen your woman?"

Yes, I'm diverting his focus.

Just mention tits or ass.

"No, I haven't gotten a fucking glimpse of her...probably for the best or else I'll fight that asshole Demetri right on the spot. I hate that bastard. I know he doesn't deserve her. By the way, Felix came calling around the shop, Carl is pretty pissed at me... but you understand, right? I mean if it was Bella, Demetri would be in a body bag. You stopped me that night, I would gladly have punched is face in and save Rosie from his clutches."

"Are you listening to yourself? Check your balls, man. I seriously think they have crawled up your body and you have grown a fucking pussy. Think, Em. Don't throw yourself to the wolves, you need strategy to win. Demetri and you are evenly matched, you can't afford to go with heart when the time comes. If you want to win, you need to be like Carl. Too bad you are in the shit house with him. He would've been your mentor. No one has bettered him in a fight. The Doc is purely lethal and he fucking knows and loves it. I'm sure it's what Aro craves, to have the Cullen boys at his beck and call. But I digress, did Felix say where the tournament is going to be held? Carl didn't say the other night or maybe I don't remember..."

"Oh...Its going to be in a small town called...wait a minute. Something like Spoons, no that's not it."

Forks?

Why the fuck that place?

"You mean the meeting will be held at Forks? I thought we would stay in the city limits...why go so far off and in a small community. Where anyone could come across the fighting? Doesn't make sense to me."

"Well, it's on an open field, deep in the woods. No one will know we'll be there. The only thing we could run into would be a hungry bear, wouldn't that be fun? Maybe I'll throw Demetri and he'll get mauled. It would be like karma bitch!"

"Em, I need to fight in this. If not who knows what the Volturi will do to us...to Carl. I can't back out now."

Em slumps in the chair and evades my eyes.

"Don't ask me to help you. Not on this, it would be against common sense. Carl, Jas and I will fight. We can recruit someone else from the club, Riley is gonna be fighting. How about that hot head Jacob? He could be game and be part of it."

Jacob?

I remember my dream... hallucination... premonition.

Whatever.

"It has to be, Em. Have the pairings been decided?"

"Um... yeah. Carl against Caius, I would be against Demetri, of course. Jasper will fight against Alec, no contest there, he will win hands down. Riley is against Royce, that could get ugly if I don't coach that kid. And well you were set to fight Felix, but you already knew that. He has a longer reach than you, it would be suicide in your state. Carl explained to us, you can't fight again. You could fucking bleed to death in seconds, drown in your own blood. And for what? I can talk with Felix and explain the situation..."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! You will not talk, if anyone with talking with that motherfucker it will be me, understand? You have caused enough shit by opening your pie hole. Just concentrate on the price and we will win this. If we win, Aro won't be able to control us, if we give up or lose, we will be his slaves. THAT CANNOT FUCKING HAPPEN."

The monitors start to go off.

And a nurse...who turns out to be Esme comes in.

"Mr. Cullen, you need to calm down. Or I'll be forced to sedate you and call your brother."

Bossy.

I bet she loves it when Carl ties her down.

I stare at her tits.

"Eyes up here, mister. Do you need me to call him right this moment? Hmm..."

Nice complexion.

Caramel colored hair.

Very nicely shaped body.

And an ass that is just to bite for...

Where is my Isabella?

Yeah, you see where I'm going...

"No wonder he ditched us the other night, damn you are fine."

Em guffaws loudly, probably alerting the hospital.

Esme just rolls her eyes and checks my vitals.

"I'll be back with your medicine."

She tries to ignore the gibe, but I notice she shuddered.

Yeah, she likes the kink and my brother is a lucky motherfucker.

Who knows, she might the be one who ties the knot around this neck.

"Have you seen Isabella?"

Em coughs and readjusts his place on the chair.

It looks extreme uncomfortable.

I wonder if maybe Isabella is sore from seating on it.

I wouldn't mind fixing that for her.

Not at all.

"She had to work, you know at the bookstore, but she will probably be around later with the dwarf. Isn't it a bit bizarre we all have sort of paired off? I was sure Jas and you would finally get hitched or something..."

"Em, you know I love you like a brother, but don't tempt me. Fucked up or not, I'll still be able to take your lights out."

I glare for good measure.

He has the balls to wink.

"Chillax, Eduardo. No need to blow a blood vessel. Jas is yours, you just need to tell that to the dwarf. I wouldn't recommend it, she looks mean. And I don't know if you would win in a chick fight, you need a pussy for that."

"Midget is of no concern of mine. As long as she stays out of my way, we can co-exist. But damn isn't she annoying little fuck, always trying to take Isabella away from me. You don't think she wants her for herself, do you Em?"

He can barely breathe.

"Oh my fucking...you call her Midget? That's priceless...it probably pisses her off every time. I don't think she is batting for the other team, she stares starry-eyed at Jas, it's sickening. He waits on her, it would make you barf too. I mean they are like puppy love and shit. I would venture a guess, she trying to protect Bella...from heartbreak...from you. As I have heard, you disappearing and leaving her, kind of fucked up Bella. She is a vulnerable girl, keep that in mind."

"I think y'all underestimate my Isabella. She is stronger than she looks and she has accepted the fact my relationship with Jas is...closer than what would be expected. She even got...shit. I'm not telling you, fucker. What is this? Are you my fucking girlfriend? Getting me to gossip like a little bitch. GET THE FUCK OUT."

Esme just passes and gives me the stink eye.

Carl will be around soon.

Fucking fantastic.

:::


	36. A chill runs down my spine

I'm half-asleep.

I hear voices close by.

Jasper.

Isabella.

"Why is he so stubborn? Doesn't he care to stay alive? I don't understand why he needs to fight. I don't."

"It's too complicated and it might be dangerous for me to explain in detail. We need to make him see reason, and to back down from this fight."

I try to keep my breathing under control.

Jas really wants me to fucking loose it.

"Why did he tell me his name was Anthony Masen?"

A chill runs down my spine.

Jas seems to have lost his voice.

"I'm not in the liberty to discuss this yet...Trust in me, it will be revealed in due time. You just need to keep loving him, and supporting us in keeping him safe and away from fighting. The prognosis is scarcely optimistic. Carl wants to lock him up and throw away the key...one hit and it would be over."

I hear someone lose their breath.

"Seat here, put your head in between your legs. Deep breaths, Bella. Shit, I'm sorry. I'll go get a nurse. Be right back."

She tries to quiet her sobs, but she can't hold them in.

In a hoarse voice, she whispers, "I just found you...you can't leave me. You can't, please...be okay. I'll lock myself with you, if I have to."

Did she know I was awake?

"Isabella? Come here, baby."

I pat the side of the bed, not much space left.

She stands and comes to me.

"I've missed you. You and your scent."

I hold her in my arms and take her particular smell.

"You heard that? Sneaky bastard...please..."

I touch her lips.

"Not now. Let me hold you, for a while. Just hold you."

She relents and snuggled into my chest.

Her sobs have stopped.

I feel like I hold the rest of my life in my hands.

She looks exhausted.

So exhausted, she falls asleep.

I stay watching over her.

"Will you do it for her? Will you live for her?"

Jas stands at the door.

His stance is defensive and his gaze determined.

He is ready for war.

"I have to do this. For all of us, even for her."

"Stop the martyr act, doesn't fucking suit you. You can be replaced and all will be well. Aro can suck my cock for all I care, you won't fucking fight again."

"I'll do what I have to, Jas. Even if it costs me my life, which it won't."

"Do you hear yourself? Are you going to train? In what like a week? You had brain surgery for fuck's sake. A drill was in your fucking skull. You don't even know if you can walk right, even less fight. How are you going to deflect hits to the head? Are you going to say, hey Felix just don't hit my fucking head or else I'll bleed to death? Great plan, by the way. You should just start looking for a casket and saying goodbye to your family and the ones you say you fucking love. Like me you asshole! What about me? Are you so selfish? So deluded of all reason, that you forget...I won't be able to survive. It will end me, I'll follow you...not even Alice will be able to stop me. Is that what you want? Look at what you hold in your hands...Is she not worth every minute of the day? Don't you want to hold her? See her with your child growing inside her...I would if I were you."

Jas looked dejected.

Defeated.

All the fight had suddenly left him.

"Jas..."

"Don't. I'll go pick up Alice."

With that, he just left.

And I felt like he had taken a part of me with him.

It made me more driven to win this fight.

Felix would fall to my feet.

That was a promise.

:::


	37. The winner is… Isabella

Isabella still sleeps.

I stay awake watching her.

I wonder what happened the night we met.

How did I get so lucky...

The pain is coming back and I know the nurse at the current shift will come by.

I ignore it.

It's not like I haven't lived with pain before.

I'm basking in my Isabella.

She looks peaceful so far...

"No...please don't...Masen, I love you."

Her whispered words sear my heart.

Jasper's words come back to haunt me.

_...Look at what you hold in your hands...Is she not worth every minute of the day? Don't you want to hold her? See her with your child growing inside her...I would if I were you._

She is worth every breath I take.

A child growing inside her...

I close my eyes and see a future with my Isabella.

Something I never imagined for myself.

I'm not worthy or deserving.

How can I be a father?

I have no job or skills.

The good in me has died, taken from me.

Carl does deserve happiness and the possibility of a family.

I have nothing to offer my Isabella, but pain and suffering.

I'll keep fighting and die eventually...maybe the next time.

I need to let her go, to find her happiness with someone worthy of her love.

Jas is right, in one thing.

I won't survive without him.

It has to be enough.

Isabella turns and I hold her in place.

My hands move over her torso and settle on her belly.

My mind seems determined to torment me.

What if I have given her a memento of me?

What if it's already growing inside her?

A half-monster, the spawn of the demon that resides inside me.

The other half is an angel.

Would I be capable of destroying that other half, the celestial being?

I hold Isabella closer to my chest and involuntary tears slip from my eyes.

I want to keep her...to be saved by her love.

But at the same time I don't want to damn her by the presence of my life in hers.

:::

I must have dozed off.

Carl is in the room.

"Good, you're awake. I need to speak with you."

Serious, no-nonsense Dr. Cullen.

"If you have come to reprimand my treatment of your hot-stuff, don't bother. It will never happen again. But I'm happy for you, Carl. It's about time you got hitched with some nice lady, that will make you a daddy and settle you down, finally. That way you won't spend your every free time looking after me. You need to live your life."

Carl just stares.

Then, he evades my stare.

I can sense my words have sunken deep.

"You are my little brother...the only family I have left in this world. I will never stop caring for you...even if it kills me. That is why I'm demanding, commanding you to stand down on this quest to fight with the Volturi. Who knows maybe Aro won't even notice, after all how much can he know..."

"That's bullshit, and you know it. We are dealing with mobsters. They probably know what we are saying at this very moment, watching our every move. That is why, I'll protect y'all with everything. I need you to support my decision in keeping Isabella away from me, until this is resolved. After that, I'll just have to grovel at her feet to take me back...if I survive, of course."

Carl sneers and through clenched teeth, growls at me.

"Do you want me to kill you? 'Cause right this moment you need to be wary of me! I want to punch you so fucking bad. No mystery why Jasper looks like he has already lost you. Em is waiting for my signal to kidnap you and lock you up. Set your priorities straight, Edward. The Cullen clan can deal with this situation, and you need to get well and live the rest of your days thanking whatever god decided you should have that angel with you."

"I...may have been reckless with her and I'm worried she... Shit."

Isabella turns and her eyes watered again.

Double shit.

"What are you planning? To ditch me? And then you are worried if you have gotten me pregnant? You fucking bastard!"

She pushes away and stands from the bed.

She's trembling all over.

"For your information, I'm on the shot, and it's good for another fucking month. Are there any diseases I should be worried that you may have infected me with? Dr. Cullen... I'm mean Carlisle, I'm sorry but I would like for you to get me an appointment as soon as possible. As for you, I'm so pissed at you now, that I can't look at your fucking face! I'm tempted to punch you as well!"

Carl tries to hold her.

"Don't stop me! I need to leave...If only you would've had faith in me, in us. I had a plan, that would've helped you...Volturi, how are you so stupid to get involved with the mob? Seriously!"

Isabella is infuriated, so much that her skin is flushed.

Her breathing is out of control.

And I want to throw on her the bed and fuck the hell out of her.

"No, mister. I can see your nostrils flaring and your eyes, you get nothing."

Carl snorts at Isabella's antics.

I fucking pout like a three-year old.

Somehow this deflated the intense atmosphere.

Her eyes find me, and she can't help but grin.

"See you later, Carlisle."

She turns to leave, but then changes direction and huffs in frustration.

"Do I have to spank you? Do you get the message? You won't get rid of me that easily. GET THROUGH YOUR RECENTLY DRILLED SKULL."

Holy fuck.

If there was ever doubt she isn't perfect...

I feel like she did punch me and it was a knockout.

The winner is...Isabella.


	38. No more words needed

Carl just watches Isabella leave.

His mouth hangs open in shock.

"I think I like her...if you don't get that head of yours out of your ass, I might steal her from you. Damn! She's fuckable...mmm.

Carl seems to want to lose his teeth and get my out of this bed against medical recommendation.

"Get your ass over here! We need to talk. Man to man."

"Don't we always? Edward...please think on this. You have something to live for, actually you have a family that wants you and you have friends and a woman who loves you. Stop fucking around, it's for you to get real."

My heart monitor starts to beep rapidly.

My breathing accelerates.

My fists are clenching uncontrollably.

"Carl, listen good. I know what you said, I've heard what Jas had to say, but I know what I have to do. So...you get me discharged as soon as possible and I'll be ready for the fight. No discussion, no threats, and no kidnapping and strapping me to a bed. This will be my last fight, after this I'll be done with fighting. That is my promise to you, my brother. Just let me do this, and then I'm done."

Carl falls to the chair, slumping down.

He looks defeated.

His head is down and his hands are open, palms up.

"This hands have saved...this hands have beaten...now you want me to sign your death with them. Fuck...Edward."

He looks into my eyes, and I see despair.

Carl doesn't cry, but now he is trying real hard not to let the tears fall.

"If it was you, you be out of this bed too. No one would take your place. I have to do this, Carl."

He nods.

No more words needed.

"What plan was Isabella referring to?"

I shrug.

"I don't know, as far as I know she didn't know anything...But it seems you wanted her to stop me."

"Can you blame me for trying? I'll see what can be done, and when you can break from this joint."

I'm ready.


	39. Is it real?

A lot of bullshit.

Lots of rest...blah, blah...blah.

I'm under my brother's, the doctor, supervision, it's the only reason I'm being discharged.

Am I a hundred percent?

Fuck, no.

My condition was stable, but I'm still in a fucked-up.

No one can explain why the first MRI didn't show the bleed or will I ever get the memories I've lost back.

Mum's the word.

Everyone looks towards, as if he as all the answers.

All I want is to leave this horrible room and get real clothes.

I have to shave my head.

I fucking look like I was scared away from the barber.

I'll have another scar, this time on my temple.

The mark of the drill, that saved my life.

The dribble continues and it seems I'll never get out.

Being bed ridden for almost a week, has left me weak as fuck.

I can barely coordinate my movements, which means zero driving.

Which brings to the forefront, how the fuck am I going to be able to fight?

:::

Jas is in the background, looking all pitiful, like his pet dog died.

Maybe Midget called it quits, after he confessed his undying devotion...to me.

That would certainly do it for the Midget I would say.

But I know what has him in this state is my decision.

I wish I could fix this in another way... but sadly there isn't another way.

Not one I can live with.

I have to fight that fancy ass pussy Felix, and hopefully it will be end of our involvement with the Volturi.

I have no doubt Carl will beat Caius down, that's a no-brainer.

Em has emotional motivation behind him, to kick Demetri out of North America.

Whether this will win him his blonde Amazon... it is still up for grabs.

As for Jas, he has his eyes on the price, he will "bulldoze" over Alec without breaking a sweat and blindfolded if he has to.

No worries there.

Meanwhile... Riley does concern me.

He is a tough kid, being around us since the beginning of Fight Club, but I fear I may have been too soft with him.

He cannot lose... if he does repercussion may arise for all of us, it may land us at the mercy of Aro and his intentions.

But then this all might be all a ruse to lure us into his territory and make us his new slaves... it has crossed my mind and I'm sure Carl's as well.

What will we do then?

No fucking idea.

Some rules will probably be broken for the greater good, I'd say.

Marcus would be Riley's opponent and what I've heard of him is he is a man of no words, but don't cross him, it will be your last breath.

Was it really Em's fault the Volturi learned of Fight Club?

I call bullshit.

They knew.

They were just waiting for the opportune to slither their way into territory.

It is naïve to believe Aro's organization wasn't on to us.

For some reason, I suspect Laurent or James, offering their services freely and stabbing us in the back.

The need to kill those fuckers returns with a vengeance.

I don't even know if I killed James that night...and I don't fucking care.

He deserves much worse.

The memories of that night, his intentions are still fresh.

Why can't I forget that and Isabella's face as she saw what he was going to do... fuck me right in front of her...

"Stop obsessing. It's done whatever it is that is driving you mad. Wanna leave? Then let's go, now. I'll take you to the apartment, on my way to work. Em will take first watch."

I glare at Jas.

"I don't fucking need any one to baby sit me, like a fucking baby!"

To Jas' delight, I almost fall flat on my face.

"Keep sayin' that to yourself. You just had brain surgery, and are under a bunch of narcotics and shit, of course you need constant attention, asshole. NOW SHUT YOUR HOLE!"

Just to grate on his barely existent patience, I keep it up.

"Which hole?"

With that he stops and turns, his nostrils are flaring.

So he is pissed, good.

Pissed off Jas is kind of turn-on.

He takes hold of my shoulders and slams me against the hallway wall.

His eyes lock with mine, his gaze might as well breathe fire, penetrating into my soul.

It causes my body to shut down, and freeze in place.

His panting breath hits my face and his eyes water contrary to his will.

"You are a selfish motherfucker...but you are MY MOTHERFUCKER, all I've got in this life is entwined with yours. You saved me back then, and you seem to want to throw all of it away. I know the real you, and even though it might scare others, I've embraced you and I've loved you. Don't you dare cheapen what we have lived and shared together. EVER. Or I'll be the one breaking you, ending you, even if it costs me my life; at the hands of your brother, or dying in jail. It may all end at my own hands, for I will surely lose the will to live..."

And with that he takes the hole and plundered his tongue to battle with mine.

Do I recall the times we have shared?

How did I save Jas back when we were scared, scrawny, teenagers lost in a system that perpetuated neglect and abuse?

Was it only my presence what saved him?

My battered brain gives me glimpses of a long hidden past, but other memories arise...

_Isabella against a wall and I'm taking everything she's got. I can hear her screams, "Masen! Fuck me harder!", but no one comes. She's so tight and warm, I keep thrusting, getting doused in her essence. I don't want it to end... "You are mine! Say it!"_

Is it real?

"Isabella..."

And I just said that out loud.


	40. There you have it, I always deliver

Wonders never cease...Isabella is right there with us.

Her gasp alerts us of her presence.

Jas detaches himself and looks in her direction.

He is trembling all over...as if he is going to attack.

"Jas...JASPER!"

My voice breaks his predator mode.

"Where are you going? Shouldn't you be in bed?"

Her hands are at her waist, she looks like a scolding mother...a mother.

I dispel the thought.

"I'm being discharged into my brother's care, and Jas was taking me to the apartment to be babysit by Em."

Jas glares my way.

I just shrug, since I'm telling her the truth.

"But...you bullied your brother into letting you go home...What about your recovery? You are being an insufferable idiot! AGH!"

Isabella is all flustered and getting blood pumping all over her skin.

I want to lick, nip, and bite in various locations...

I'm already aroused from before, Jas' actions and the visual merry-go-round of Isabella.

I fucking want them both.

I'm glutton, so punish me.

Or give it all to me.

Jas shakes his head, as if he can deliberately read my thoughts.

I growl in response.

"SPEAK FOR FUCK'S SAKE? What are you cavemen? Jeesh are you exasperating...Well I'll best be going and work a shift, I need the money...not this aggravation from you two. Later..."

Fuck later.

Now you leave with...us.

"Don't act so coy, Isabella. You know what it means and you know you want it...badly. So stop your posturing and get over here!"

She has the audacity to look flabbergasted at my words, but I don't give a shit.

She is mine.

I want her now.

She is going to give it all to me.

"Um...Masen you are convalescing, you are not up for...you know..."

Isabella is getting redder as she tries to explain the reasons why I can't fuck her...as if I need reasons not to.

"Look at it this way...if I can fuck you both, then I'm good for fighting. How does that sound?"

Jas looks like he wants this to happen ASAP.

His body is showing all the signs of an aroused male.

I just lick my lips.

Yeah, we are that easy.

On the other hand, Isabella looks like a fish out of water, with her mouth opening and closing.

"Are you serious?"

"You know me, right? When am I not true to my word?"

Suddenly I feel I've said the wrong thing, her eyes dim somewhat.

In a small voice, she replies, "You always deliver."

There you have it, I always deliver.

I give her a smug motherfucking smile.

And she finally connects her eyes with mine, giving in return a great big smile.

That's my intrepid Isabella.

"Let's go then...or we'll get incarcerated for indecent exposure and indecent conduct in public."

Jas tries to get us out of our private bubble, as he adjusts himself with difficulty.

I'm simply getting a kick out getting my way.


	41. Yeah, Midget eat your heart out

In a haze I wake in my bed.

Alone.

What the fuck?

Last time I remember...I was ready to be bedded by my two loves.

Where are they?

Light-headedness incapacitate me.

I slump back into the mattress.

Closing my eyes, I try to think back.

I was getting discharged.

Jas was taking me home.

Isabella was there...and it got heated...then fuck if I know.

Fucking blackouts.

With a lot more effort I'm finally able to stand on my feet.

The room spins for a moment.

If this continues, I'm totally fucked.

Carl can't find out about these spells.

I hear voices from the living space...Isabella is still here.

It brings a smile to my face, just knowing she is near brightens everything.

Suddenly I wonder what my dear mates are telling her.

There's no hurry to make my presence known.

I recognize Jas is speaking, explaining something of importance it seems.

"...you must be patient. He will understand you have good intentions, only to prevent a tragedy from happening. He didn't want you to know the predicament we are in with the Volturi. I believe they were just waiting in the shadows to pounce on the opportunity to take us out or join them. After all Aro's MO is getting strays to his fold, to do his will, as a "family". What you propose gets us out of this bind, and the streets and future boys free from Aro's reign. He wants control over the west, he already controls Seattle and Olympia, and looking for easy access to Canada if he needs to escape. If you get your father to help us...it would safe us, it would save Edward."

Save us?

Father?

I'm so pissed at Jas now, I'm half wanting to kick his ass and the other half to take Isabella out of here.

I need not only protect my family, but now I have to protect Isabella from Aro's grasp.

I may already be to late...he might still use her against me.

I feel exhausted, and I've only walked from my room to the hallway.

It doesn't look promising.

Em finds me fighting for staying upright.

"Hey there Ed...not looking good there man, need a hand? Come on, I take you back to bed. You need to rest. If something happens to you under my watch, Carl will have my balls...and I'm kind of want to keep them, ok?"

Only Em would find this humorous.

"It's ok, I'm just trying to..."

He gives me his famous wink, and his dimples show.

"You were trying to be James Bond and spy, but I think you are not doing a very good job, there Eddiekins."

Grating on my patience, that's Em's MO.

"Would you keep your voice down...help back I think I'm gonna pass out."

I'm grumbling under my breath.

This is not what I pictured doing when we all got home.

Naked bodies.

Heated kisses.

Lingering caresses.

Possessing of each other.

Taking what's mine and giving what's mine to give.

Might as well invite the Midget for a chat.

I have cock-blocked myself.

"Having a monologue with yourself? Signs you need a psych evaluation sooner than later..."

I glare at Em and take his arm off.

"Shut the fuck up! You don't know what I'm going through...it's frustrating to lose track to time, to forget important things...an important person. To feel weak...I've never depended on another and I need to overcome this or else we are fucked when we face those motherfuckers. Now you understand? Or are you to pussy obsessed over that Rosalie? Who may not be worth all your efforts to save her? Have you thought of that? What if after you win, she rejects you? Then what?"

Deflection.

I AM A BASTARD.

"You know all the answers. You are the head of the Cullen Clan. You know what Ed? Suck my cock, while you fall on your ass, why don't ya. I know I'm taking a risk, but it's worth it. Rosalie is worth it. 'Cause she deserves a second chance at life, she deserves better than that Neanderthal walking animal, who we all know beats and abuses her. I making a stand and if that frees her from him, then my purpose is done. If she gives me the time of day after, well I won't lie, it would make me the happiest man alive. Stop thinking of yourself. Don't pretend you are doing this for the clan, when clearly is your fucking pride talking and wanting glory. Fuck you very much!"

And with that he leaves me, struggling against the wall.

I hit a nerve.

Clearly, Em's motivations are noble.

It makes me feel like shit for baiting him.

It irritates me that I didn't even got a shot at him.

This would've been settled with our fists.

Jab here, and uppercut there.

Some blood.

The end.

Now, it was stewing inside me.

Emotions.

I can't deal with them.

I feel like I'm choking on them.

But I feel I do have a noble cause.

I have to protect Isabella, even if I die trying.

Whatever this plan she has concocted could be dangerous, since it would implicate her.

Em slams the door.

I wince since it feels like he slammed it against my temple.

I finally seat and lean beside the headboard.

My energies feel depleted.

In turn, I feel dejected and defeated.

"You are up? Good. I need to give you your meds, and then you can crash again."

"I thought you had work...but Em left. We had a bit of an argument."

Jas looks intently into my eyes.

"I know, we heard. You were baiting him, Masen. It serves no purpose, only to antagonize each other. It wasn't really fair to point out he may not get the woman of his dreams in the end. Em is a simple man, but with really good intentions. He might not recognize the big picture, but he wants to do good. Speaking of good intentions...Isabella has a plan, and I want you to listen to it and consider it. It would rid this city of Aro and his scum, meanwhile we would be free of them."

My mind plays tricks on me...and the green monster shows his ugly head.

"You didn't touch her, right?"

I try to be menacing, but I'm sure it looks like I'm about to cry.

"Huh...What? No, of course not. Isabella stayed, she wanted to make sure you were all right. You passed out in the car, forcing me to carry you to your own bed. So much for getting tested and fucking two at once...don't worry it's expected. You need to recuperate, and let us help and look for other options available. If you have to fight, I want to have a back-up and what Isabella has suggested potentially helps us, and gives us an advantage."

Isabella appears at my door.

She stands apprehensively.

I don't like it.

"Come here, baby."

I pat the bed, just like I did back at the hospital.

Her smiles returns and she practically tackles the bed.

"Ow! Hey I'm recuperating here!"

She laughs and in turn we all laugh.

Her face is just inches from my face.

"I'll take those...later, it can wait."

I go ahead and devour her lips.

She tastes sweet, like honey and lime.

"You had tea?"

She nods.

"Jas made me tea...He says is for calming the nerves. Do I taste good?

I moan loudly.

Understatement.

"Yesss, fuck yes. I want to taste you somewhere else too..."

Isabella blushes and her breathing staggers.

"I'll leave you two...I called in sick, again. Em said he would take another shift. Um..."

Jas is rambling...so unlike him.

He doesn't know how to conduct this new variable in our relationship.

So I will make it easy for him.

"Where are you going?"

He looks a bit lost.

"I...I am giving you privacy. I'll be in my room."

I feel better not standing.

Hmm...maybe I can persuade for a bit of afternoon delight...

My cock is already up, but then he has his own agenda.

Isabella's hand seems to get the memo and wanders.

Jas looks at her hand, as if hypnotized.

"You know you want to...Stay."

His intense gaze searches... for my approval?

"She is mine. Only I get to touch, to kiss, to nip, to bite, to fuck...Only I get to love her, but you get to touch, to kiss, to nip, to bite, to fuck...Me."

Isabella stops her tentative touches.

Her lips touch my earlobe, and she whispers, "I get to watch?"

She is panting already.

Without hesitation I answer.

"Yes, I get to fuck you, while he fucks me, baby."

In return, Isabella whimpers.

Jas is still frozen in place, but his breathing betrays him.

"How?"

"You know how."

He growls angrily.

"You can barely stand."

"I'll be the jelly of the sandwich, need more visuals?"

He gulps.

Isabella resumes her touches, arousing me even more.

I take her mouth again, its mine.

In the next five seconds, Jasper's mind is made.

Yeah, Midget eat your heart out.


	42. I want more, so much more

In a whirlwind, clothes are gone.

My Isabella takes my shirt off.

While Jas strips himself, without taking his eyes off me.

Seduction at its best.

If I don't get inside her, I'm gonna explode in my fucking jeans.

My cock is getting impatient and weeping at the tip.

He wants to be the jelly that binds this human sandwich.

But Isabella is in no hurry.

"E..Masen...can I taste you?"

Eh...fuck.

"Baby, I want you now...we can do that later."

Jas is naked and saluting.

Gotta be proud of that soldier.

We have been through thick and messy.

"Help me, baby..."

Isabella snaps off the button flies, as she teases my erect cock.

I fucking whimper in pain and pleasure.

I want more, so much more.

Jas takes pity on Isabella and aids her efforts.

She shies away from looking at him directly.

I kind of love that.

Her eyes are only for me.

I turn on my side, and Jas slips behind, his arms go around my torso holding me close.

I feel his breath on my neck.

"I...love you."

I stop breathing for a few seconds.

How can he love me this much?

"Don't you fucking die...don't."

I can hear his anguish and despair.

Isabella is on the prowl, licking and sucking my chest, trying to get her way.

I allow it...for now.

I need to console my best friend.

I turn my head and look in his eyes.

"Shh...you don't have to worry so much, you'll get premature aging if you keep it up and then Midget won't like you anymore..."

Shit...Midget.

I fucked-up again.

He rests his forehead on my shoulder.

"You think she will understand? I love her too...but we are inseparable. If she doesn't..."

I breath deeply, trying to control my urge to grab Isabella's head and ram my cock into her teasingly infuriating mouth.

"If she doesn't love all of you, then she doesn't deserve you..."

A tear slips from his eye, and he nods.

He kisses my lips chastely.

His hand roams downward taking my cock into his hand.

Isabella stops and watches curiously.

It's as if she has never seen it.

I need to get her attention.

"Isabella. You are wearing too many clothes."

She fucking giggles and blushes from head to chest.

Such a lovely pink color.

Thankfully, Jas is too entranced by my cock to take notice, as my Isabella proceeds to dispel her clothes...one by one.

She is slowly torturing me to death.

"Isabellaaaa... fuck baby."

She grins wickedly loving my pout.

She takes my lower lip between her own, nibbling on it.

She let's it go, and gets closer.

"Are you mine?"

Wide eyed, she waits for my answer.

"Yes, I'm yours...as you are mine."

My hands take hold of her breast, teasing her engorged nipples.

"These are only for me. You are only for me."

Jas slows and rests his head on the crook of my neck.

He licks the sweat that has collected on it.

Isabella joins him and lick my chin and my collarbone.

It's time.

My left hand moves and takes hold of Jas' hip.

My other hand lingers on Isabella's face.

I whisper, "I love you...both of you. I'm nothing without you."

My chest feels like is about to burst, and so is my cock.

Enough emotions.

"Now you get that sweet ass of your aligned to my cock, baby."

My Isabella obeys my command, not without wiggling it.

Jas bites on my shoulder trying to hold his laughter.

Yes, my Isabella is adorable.

Without warning, I thrust and I'm engulfed in her warmth.

"Fuck me..."

That's enough direction for Jas to take me.

I grunt loudly at the double sensation.

It's too much and not enough at the same-time.

"Fuck...ahh... shit Masen, I can't stop."

Yeah, you and me both.

I thrust erratically, not deep enough.

Isabella tries to keep with the rhythm but there's none.

Someone needs to come...and I think it will be me.

My left hand stops holding Jas closer, and moves towards Isabella's clit.

She needs to come apart.

I take little nibbles on her neck and shoulder.

"Mine...mine...you belong to me, Isabella."

"YES! Oh...yes, Masen. Harder, please."

As Jas thrust deeper, so do I.

He takes a bite on my left shoulder that stings.

He is close.

My desire to mark my Isabella hasn't been satiated.

My mouth moves over my healing mark.

It needs to me reclaimed.

My teeth inscribe her skin.

MINE.

"Fuck!"

Jas holds my hips harder, probably leaving another mark on my body.

I can't hold on anymore.

I feel as if I'm about to black out, a white light takes hold of my vision.

The last I'm conscious of is Isabella screaming her pleasure.

Then, all is silent.


	43. Midget doesn't like to share

Silence.

I'm no longer on a bed.

It's a field surrounded by trees.

Only source of light is a full moon.

I'm not alone.

Aro.

Felix.

Demetri.

Marcus.

Alec.

Caius.

The Volturi are all here.

Behind me I can see Carl, Em, Jas and Riley are flanking me, ready to pounce at a moment's notice.

I shake my head.

There's someone else with them, but it's not visible from where I stand.

I can barely breathe, the air is suffocating, missing the fucking oxygen needed to live.

I have the extreme urge to flee.

My fight or flight instincts are wrangling each other.

A whimper startles me.

Isabella is in Aro's arms.

He touches her face and whispers in her ear.

Tears are non-stop on her face.

"LET HER GO!"

Aro cackled gleefully.

He's got me.

I feel defeated and lost.

Locking his eyes with mine, he shows no mercy.

I beg.

I plead.

"Please..."

He breaks her neck...her lifeless body...My Isabella, tumbles to the ground.

With it my reason for fighting, for fucking, for breathing, for living.

I stare at her opened eyes, bottomless pools of my agony.

Aro stands right in front of me.

His rancid breath blows in my face.

He whispers...

"You are dead."

My eyes snap open.

Sweat glistens on my skin.

My heart beat drowns all sounds.

Gasping breaths.

As my vision clears from the fog of the nightmare I've just had...

I'm aware my bed companions are missing.

The haze is gone, but I've awoken to another type of nightmare.

Unfortunately, a bleak reality.

Harsh words are wailed.

Something went wrong while I slept.

Midget doesn't like to share.


	44. Midget is a fucking drama queen

"Alice...calm down."

"FUCK YOU, Dr. Cullen! But I think I have the right to scream all I want after...HOW COULD YOU BELLA?"

Deep breaths.

I can't get up, my arms are like jelly.

Which makes me laugh, 'cause I was the jelly last night.

But it's short-lived when I hear my Isabella sobbing.

"Alice...it's not what you think...I didn't sleep with Jasper, just please listen to me..."

A slap.

A gasp.

A whimper...that I'm sure came from Jas.

My heart constricts in my chest.

He is in so much pain...his dream is withering right in front of his eyes.

"I thought you were my friend, my best friend. I treated you like a sister, letting you live with me...and this is how you repay with betraying me and fucking the man of my life. Get your shit out and I don't give a shit what happens to you. I know what I saw...you are a sick bitch, Edward isn't enough for you...so you had to ensnare mine."

"Ali...I love you, but this is more complicated than you think...and Bella is innocent in all of it. Just let me explain, Ed-"

Another slap.

More sobs, from my Isabella.

"ENOUGH! You cheated on me, now we are over. The end. I hope that stings, Jasper Whitlock, and it gets fucking infected. As for you, Isabella Swan, I hope you lose all your gorgeous brown hair after the tugging and pulling I've down. My work is down. Good day, Dr. Cullen, may we never cross paths again."

And with that she slammed the front door.

And my head started pounding as if she had taken a couple of jabs to my forehead.

"I need to check on Edward...I'm sorry, I let her in since she was desperate to see you, Jasper. She had tried at your workplace, but you didn't show, and then you didn't answer your cell...Fuck, I didn't know she was going to find you naked on Ed's bed...with Isabella. If you need me to check you both, I'll do it before I have to go back to the hospital. Now, if you excuse me."

Carl was awkward, in a very awkward situation.

I felt powerless, since I extremities didn't cooperated.

I would've put Midget in her place, all high and mighty.

Yes, Jasper would've been more forth coming.

But doesn't she think he is the One?

This is his nightmare come alive.

Midget caught us, naked in bed.

And she believes my Isabella cheated and betrayed her with Jas.

He may become catatonic after this.

I guess I'm lucky I found Isabella...she is my One.

Jas worries me...he is bound for a regression.

He will wallow in his misery...and usually resorts to my comfort.

Only know I have Isabella.

Will her understanding withstand this adversity?

My pondering is interrupted by my dear older brother.

"I've survived a war zone...I regret opening that door for her. If only I had known **you** were having a fucking threesome...Only you would think that's possible after having brain surgery."

He is in full doctor mode with the mini flashlight right in my eyes, momentarily blinding me.

"You passed out, Jas told me. You've been pretty much unconscious since, so I need to check your vitals, and your reactions. If you don't like it, you are going back, understand?"

I just nod.

My mind is on the war zone.

"Did she hurt my Isabella?"

Carl stares at me.

"She...took her anger pretty much on her. She yanked her hair and brought her out of the room. I can't imagine how you stayed asleep through it. But you engaged in strenuous activities and were bound to be knocked out. It was the best thing really, to let you sleep, it allows the body to heal itself."

I growl.

"Don't divert the conversation. Do I need to fucking punch a woman, Carl?"

Carl evades eye contact and grimaces.

"Isabella will be fine. I'm sure her wounds are more emotional than anything else. They were like sisters and this has broken their bond...She has no place to stay and..."

Isabella will stay here.

In this bed.

With me.

I fucking beam.

"What are you grinning at, fucker? Reminiscing already about your exploits..."

Carl has to ruin all the fun.

Another slam.

Jas must be going after Midget...Fuck.

He is gonna return devastated.

My dislike for Midget increases exponentially.

"Did you take your meds? Hmm...that's a no. Your blood pressure is low, so stay here or you will faint. How is your vision?"

I shake my head, trying to clear it.

"I'm better, it was a bit blurry when I woke up, but now I can clearly see your love bites. That Esme is a fucking vampire, Carl. I guess, Operation Fuck Nurse Esme is still in effect."

Carl answers in the universal manly way.

A grunt.

"Smartass."

I smirk.

"No more exertion from you of any kind, so threesomes are out."

And all good taste.

I'm staring at the half-opened door, willing Isabella to come to me.

I need to have her in my arms.

This is not her fault.

Midget is a fucking drama queen, taking it out on my Isabella.

If there is someone to blame, it's me.

Let her take it out on me.

Carl touches my chin bringing me back.

"You can't fix everything, Edward. And not always with your methods...violence just brings more violence. We are more than experts on the subject."

I try to swallow, but I'm extremely thirsty.

"Here, take small sips. You must be dehydrated and that doesn't help your recovery."

In a rasping voice I demand, "My Isabella."

I try once more to sit against the headboard, but Carl holds me down.

"Give her space. I'm sure she will seek your comfort. I'll help her get her stuff later or Em could go over to Alice's apartment."

He looks at his wrist watch.

"Ugh...Have to get back to my shift, but if anything changes, please call me. Stay here and let other take care of you. She will take care of you, more than you know."

Take care of me.

I'll take care of all.

Even if it's the last thing I do.


	45. Fuck, down boy

They say time heals all wounds...

I call BULLSHIT.

But I thank my lucky stars for a failing memory.

If I did remember everything in detail, it probably would've made me a serial killer.

I would've taken all the hate, all the rage bottled up inside me, against the world.

Against the men who are responsible.

Against the system that failed me.

Against the people who turned a blind-eye.

Against all the goodness in someone's eye.

Yes, I would've been an out of control, predator.

Sometimes, I question...if I'm not already headed that way.

Fight Club is my way of controlling those urges...to bleed...to hit...to destroy.

My kind of structured chaos.

With rules and a cocky leader on top.

It's good to be king.

But now I've made a promise, one I can't back out from.

It means no more Fight Club, no more stitches, or broken knuckles.

How will I contain my anger?

The rage that lives within me.

I suddenly feel as if underwater...drowning.

I start to panic.

But my salvation is at the door, looking shy and afraid.

Never again, my Isabella.

You are safe from It.

"How are you feeling? Do you need me to make you something to eat? I can-"

"Come seat by me...I need to feel you, baby."

There's something I need to find out...from Isabella.

That infamous plan of hers, that will save us from ruin.

Kind of funny really...this woman who acts all coy and shy is as sexually charged and my mate in every way.

And she wants to be my savior.

Do I trust her with my life?

Can I give up the control?

She fidgets at first, but finally relents.

She is wearing one of Jas' buttoned down shirt.

I wonder if she is bare underneath.

And my cock wonders too.

Fuck, down boy.

Or Carl will have your head.

We can't have that.

Back on target.

She rest her head under my chin, and sniffles.

"I...I need to get my stuff and look for a place. Shit, I don't know what I'm gonna do with my dad, if he finds out I'm not living with Alice, he will come and get me..."

I fucking growl.

"You are staying here. End of discussion. You will be safe with us. Want me to call your dad?"

Isabella blanches and stares at me, yeah like a deer caught in the headlights.

Maybe now she will tell about that dad and his miraculous ways to save our asses.

"Um...An- I mean Edward, there might be a problem with that. You see my dad, well he is ..."

I get exasperated with her stalling.

Why can she just say it?

"He is an ATF agent...and he is extremely protective of his only daughter."

BAM!

And that's how you punch someone in the face without moving a muscle.

And how's he fit into the plan?

Oh, yeah by shooting us in the head.

And burying us somewhere no one can find us.

Great plan.


	46. Maybe Isabella isn't safe from It

ATF

That means Papa Swan has the ability and the right to shoot me and dispose of my body and my favorite appendage in another box, if he wants too.

Fuck.

Nothing is ever easy, is it?

Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives...Fighting against violent crime.

Nice.

I fight for fun and he fights against violence.

Oh, he'll just love that his ONLY daughter has fallen head over heels with a fuck-up like me.

"Ed- Look at me. Are you breathing all right? Fuck, EDWARD!"

I've just lost my balls, right in front of my girl.

Good thing, Em is not here now.

"Breathe...Are lightheaded? You should lie down and I'll call Dr. Cullen, okay?"

This gets my attention.

"No...Don't call Carl. He just left. It just...your dad-"

Isabella stares into my eyes.

"He is a good man. If you trust me, I can talk with Charlie, tell him you are being coerced by Aro. My dad will help us get him and his gang. The Volturi are menace that needs to be eradicated. I've talked with Jas, Em and Carl, about using my dad's contacts and position. That way you guys get immunity for participating in this illegal fighting ring the Volturi want to start, in conjunction to their other illegal activities that plague this area."

She pleads with her eyes.

For me to understand.

To trust.

But how can I trust this?

The system has failed me.

Who was there to guard my security from Phil?

Who was there to protect what was left of my innocence from the prying hands of disturbed children?

No one.

Not even Carl could protect me, or even I wasn't capable of protecting him then.

"Are you sure your dad isn't in cahoots with the Volturi mafia? I heard they pay a pretty penny to keep their business growing and believe me it's fucking growing."

Isabella slaps me, hard.

"How dare you? Charles Swan is the most ethical and by the book man in the fucking agency. Why do I bother trying...you are not going to allow me to help, are you? Wanna die? Fine, goodbye. I'll be going then. I'll wait for Carlisle or Em. Then you won't ever see me again, you bastard. I don't have my best friend anymore and you have to act like it didn't even happened. Yes, I fucking consented, and I'm responsible, but stop being all high and mighty. Jas is heart-broken and you'll have to pick up the pieces and fix him back. So it's better I leave..."

I have stayed dumbfounded by her slap, but now her words pierce right through me...

She is leaving...me.

She thinks I don't trust or need her.

And still have to deal with Jas.

I grit my teeth and clench my fists.

I sit up fighting the pull to lose it.

"Listen up, Isabella. First, I need you like I need to fucking breathe. Second, you are staying right here. There are no other options, you are in danger anywhere else. Third, Jas is an important part of my life, and thankfully you have accepted, but it doesn't mean you are less important or expendable. We will heal together. As for Midget...let's be glad I was out on my ass or else things would've been totally different. I don't give a shit about her tantrum. She took all her anger out on you, and the real person she is angry at is herself. Fourth, about your dad...I'm sorry. It was a very dick move on my part to attack your dad and question his integrity. But I'm not total sold on that plan of yours and how is it going to keep us from going to jail with the Volturi. Just stay, right here with me."

I don't let her think it over or even take a breath.

I take her mouth and attach myself to her, grabbing and yanking her loosen mane of hair.

Brushing and biting her lips.

Tasting her on my tongue.

Buttons fly everywhere.

Nipples exposed.

"Never again question my love for you."

Her gasp pleases me.

"Or I will punish you for insubordination."

I mark a new territory.

New teeth marks paint her skin, saying she's mine.

"MINE. MINE. MINE."

Nothing matters.

Only her.

She moans her approval.

My answer, a proud growl.

Maybe Isabella isn't safe from _It_.


	47. There was only love

Isabella stopped me.

I relented, since I was supposed to be recuperating and all that bullshit.

She force-fed me the barrage of pills I had to take religiously to the hour, which clearly I hadn't done.

She would make a formidable mother...and here I go again.

Has this creature changed me so?

I had never considered having a normal relationship, even less the possibility of children.

I guess in a subconscious level, I've always seen myself living the rest of my dying days with Jas.

Em would say that is so gay and beautiful.

He's a romantic at heart.

No wonder he has put his life and ours on the line for a "the woman of his life".

I really hope she is.

If not, I don't know what will happen in the next session of Fight Club, but someone might die at his hands.

A child.

Yes, I could wish for it, but maybe not now.

We are getting to know each other, and are in the middle of a cluster-fuck with mobsters.

So, yeah not the greatest timing.

Then, there's Midget and her meltdown...and Jas and his breakdown.

I'm so not looking forward to his return.

It might require our coping ways and I'm not sure it's the best time for it.

But if it comes to that I'll give him what he needs, as he has done in the past with me.

Isabella walks out of the room, she wants to get her cell and call her dad.

A shiver runs through my spine.

A fucking ATF agent...and she wants me to trust him.

I have to give it to my Isabella, it's a good plan.

If it does workout, we could be free from the Volturi and I can pursue Isabella, maybe even marry her.

I scratch my head.

It feels weird not having hair to tug, but I want to have a heart beat.

It will grow back soon enough, so Isabella can take hold from as she ravages my mouth to her heart's content.

But I can deny I miss it...the blood, the sweat, the adrenaline rush, the fucking click inside my head.

It wants to be fed.

How will I feed this need?

It reminds me I haven't heard how the club has operated since my absence.

I bet Carl has ridden everyone to the brink of destruction, such a stickler for the rules that one.

Then so am I.

James comes to mind.

Hate brews and stirs in my blood.

I should have bashed his head until he was dead.

He must live still, since I'm not in jail for murder.

My instincts tell me it won't be the last I see of him.

"Isabella?"

No answer.

Has she left, on her own?

Fuck, she better have not.

Or I'll have to get up and bring her back.

I would enjoy her punishment, so very much.

I may borrow Carl's cuffs, he acts all proper on the job, but behind close doors that asshole is into kink, and beating the shit out of fuckers for free.

That is my brother, my role model.

Her voice is low, but is coming closer.

"Yes, I'm still working at the bookshop, the one right beside the diner...But there's a situation...No I'm not pregnant. Sheesh! Oh, what? Yes, I do have a boyfriend. His name? You gonna check up on him? Well, I'm kind of living with him at the moment... Please calm down, Charlie... Dad!"

Oh, it was going over so well.

I could see the headline: **ATF Agent goes on a rampage kills daughter's fucked-up loser boyfriend**.

Fuck.

"I need to visit you, 'cause we need your help. Don't get over excited or I'll call Sue to come and take care of you. No need to get your blood pressure higher than it already is. Edward and his brothers need assistance...but I have to discuss this in person. So, you should be happy that I'm gonna come and visit. Alice? No she won't be accompanying me...we had a spat. Yes, I know you _loooove_ her, but she needs her space, and so do I. Edwin? No, his name is Edward. Don't try to trick out the last name so you can run it through the system...not yet. Well, I lo- I mean I really like him, Daddy, so be nice for me, okay? Yeah, we live with other people. Separate rooms? This is the 21st century. Okay, I'll call you when I'm on my way. Later. Love you."

I was grinning.

My Isabella was sassy and adorable.

I kind of liked the way she handled her old man.

It was refreshing...I barely remembered how my father was with us.

Carl had better recollections of the past.

My memories were blurry images, fogged out by the traumatic events that destroyed the light and goodness in me.

Finally, she pushes the door that she had left ajar.

"Sorry...my dad was being a pain. He practically was fuming through the phone, and I'm pretty sure he's calling Alice as we speak. Hopefully, she'll ignore the call. He wasn't too happy about me staying here with you...a red-blooded full-grown male...but I said my piece. I also bribed him with my cooking, when I go and visit him. I'll have to go to Forks, that way I can speak in person about the plan. I might be gone two to three days..."

She was gonna be gone...for days?

Shit.

I'm pussy whipped, 'cause there was no way I was going to handle being far away from her.

"I'm going with you."

Isabella pursed her lips and lifted her brow.

"No, sorry Mr. Cullen. You need to recover as soon as possible, that means no Fight Club, well ever, and rest and take your medicine. Occasionally get into make-outs with your drop-dead gorgeous girlfriend, but that's pretty much it. It's doctor's orders and I will make you follow them to the letter."

She even crossed her arms, pushing her breast closer, making me hard just as easily.

I closed my eyes and moaned.

"Don't tease me baby...I want to bury myself in you in every-way possible and you aren't letting me...you are the best medicine. Let me take my dose, now."

I kept clenching my jaw.

She was too good at getting me riled up.

Maybe I was worrying for nothing...a dose of Jas on the side and the rest worshiping Isabella would appease my demons.

I could only hope.

One of my shirts hit the floor.

She was massaging her breast and puckering those nipples.

I was practically ready to burst just from the visual stimuli.

"More? You want more?"

Her hands were moving towards the oversized boxers she was wearing.

Yes, show me.

The front door slammed.

Our trance was broken.

Jas stormed in, not even taking the spectacle of my Isabella half-naked giving me a sensual striptease.

He came directly towards me, and without explanation devoured my lips.

Tears were still running down his cheeks.

Midget's mark was red and angry on his face.

I could infer from his behavior, that she hadn't understood or forgiven our actions.

He opened his eyes and locked them with mine.

He was drowning in sorrow and so much pain.

He was begging for the comfort only I could give him.

Taking his face in my hands, I cleared his tears.

My forehead fell on his, and we closed our eyes.

No words were whispered.

No need for them.

I sensed Isabella was feeling like an intruder, but Jas needed more at the moment.

"I'll start dinner...so I'll be in the kitchen."

With that she left and closed the room after her.

I heard and felt his sigh.

In a whisper, Jas said, "You better keep her forever."

It hurt to see him so vulnerable...and once again I felt the compulsion to hit that Midget.

He had gotten his hopes up.

And now she had broken him...just like his bitch of a mother, may she rot in hell.

His lips brushed my ear, "I need you so much...please don't ever leave me."

His words caused a visceral reaction inside me.

He was practically saying if he lost me, he would not live.

It was like we were sixteen all over again.

Jas in that godforsaken communal bathroom with the razor.

The blood.

Drops of it everywhere.

We had made a pack that night.

If one goes, so does the other one.

Not even Carl knew about it.

Jas had reminded me of it in the hospital.

Our bonds were stronger than anything I had ever experienced.

Maybe even more than what I felt with Carl.

Involuntary tears sprang from my eyes.

In a hoarse voice I replied.

"Not even my Isabella will keep me from you."

It was enough.

His mouth returned to my lips.

It wasn't lust what fueled our souls together this time...like so many in these past ten years.

"Maybe I was wrong, Masen...Maybe she wasn't the one. You are the one...the one for me."

My eyes opened searching for his.

There was only love.

So much love.

For me.


	48. This one I could spit on her face

**-:::::-**

Nothing could prepare me.

Jas looked devastated and exhausted.

Midget had no mercy on my Jas, not one pinch of it.

And she proclaimed she loved him...yeah your actions speak louder than words.

He fell asleep, as he poured his sorrow, on me.

He didn't look like a twenty-five year old man.

It was like he was eight-years old and his mother had just betrayed him.

With her lasciviousness.

With her sin.

With her neglect.

Once again I felt tempted to find her grave and piss and shit on it.

And now Midget, the other woman in his life had to bring on the misery.

This one I could spit on her face.

**-:::::-**

I had finally gotten my way, and was sitting on the living room couch.

My back was killing and it was all that lying around in bed.

We had just ate the most delicious hamburgers made by my Isabella.

Em almost had an orgasm right in front of everyone.

Carl had a good laugh, which is rare.

It felt like we were finally complete...a family.

Isabella living with us, was having a positive effect on all the male-testosterone mentality.

She had power over me.

Carl loved her to pieces.

Em loved to tease and yank her ponytail.

Jas had said (and I quote), "You better keep her forever."

Riley wasn't too keen on her, but then he didn't count he didn't live here all the time.

Em kept giving me looks and whispering "I'm just a jealous guy".

I wanted to punch him, but then that could very well end in my head getting bashed, so no.

It wasn't a secret that Riley was my loyal follower...and once a upon a time would've loved to have been more.

But Jas was in his way...it was no secret he wanted us to "break up".

I do feel awful for the things I did to him back at the home.

He didn't deserved to be treated, as I had been treated by the older, meaner and stronger boys.

I tried once to discuss the subject, but Riley declined saying it was all in the past and it had served its purpose.

He was proud to be part of the Cullen Clan.

And I knew that he was entrusted with taking care of me, when the others couldn't.

For him that was a great honor.

Fucking hero-worship.

**-:::::-**

As people started to disperse into their rooms, I was left on the couch, while Isabella and Jas cleaned up.

Carl left as soon as he finished, claiming that tonight was free for all, but I knew he was on his way to get some.

Lucky bastard.

Em was too preoccupied with a call.

I didn't give that much thought.

Riley left, after receiving some instructions from Carl and Em... all so cloak and dagger.

That I didn't like at all.

Isabella said I was pouting like a three-year old child.

I answered she should feed me then.

Her answer, "Fuck me, Masen".

Fuck, yes.

Unfortunately, she stayed away.

Jas was taciturn, as it was expected, but at least he was helping.

I was afraid he would just shut down and stop functioning, so seeing him interact with Isabella was a good sign.

I was waiting for someone.

A visit.

If said person didn't come, then said person wasn't worth it.

Right on time, there was knocking at the door.

"I'll get it!"

Jas tried to block me, and open it himself, but this time it had to me.

Somehow I found the strength to win the race to the door.

"Well, hello there Alice...I'm glad you decided to accept my invitation."

Jas shivered and looked betrayed.

Isabella was right behind me and I heard her gasp.

Her hands were on my back, taking hold of my t-shirt.

Everyone was on edge over our visitor.

It seemed the only one happy to see Midget was me.

Go figure.

"Edward... I'm sorry, but I think this was a mistake it's just too soon... and you aren't alone."

She was ready to flee and I was getting pissed off.

"Nonsense... We, as you and I are gonna discuss certain things. These two won't be be part of the conversation. Right, Jas and Isabella? We can talk in my room. Please come in..."

Midget took hesitant steps inside.

Isabella felt so uncomfortable, that she started to babble.

"Are you hungry? I made hamburgers...if you want I can make you a plate..."

"Not now, Isabella. Alice and I, we need to be left alone. No interruptions, understand?"

Jas was opening and closing his mouth, trying to voice is objection.

He was deflecting looking directly into my eyes.

"...Masen, please...don't..."

So much pain...I almost desisted on my plan.

Almost.

"Come along, Mid...Alice."

**-:::::-**

With the door closed, the floodgates on Midget's rage were open and descended over me.

"I hate you...all your arrogance and your hold over Jasper. That is why I'm here. I wanted to say it to your face. You are the reason we are over. Your hold over him, takes him away from me. Your sick control has to stop, or he'll never be happy. What is this a cult? All these boys follow and do as you tell them? And now to get him to sleep with your girlfriend, to brain wash Bella into fucking another guy? Well, that's just sick-"

"Are you finished? 'Cause that was all BULLSHIT. Look Midget, I DON'T LIKE YOU. I asked you to come, on behalf of Isabella's friendship with you, and for Jas' sake. First, I don't have a hold over Jasper or control his life. Clearly, if I did I would've demanded he dump your ass first time I met you. It seems to me you don't know the man you claim to love. If you are with Jas all the way, you need to understand what's under the surface. My relationship with Jas...is not just best buds, we lived through some experiences that bonded us for live.

If you can't understand or accept that, then there's the door. It may look like we are co-dependent and that's some unhealthy shit, but we don't give a fuck. For ten years, we've been brothers, friends...and lovers. That is the truth, take or leave it. Jas was fucking me, that night, not Isabella. He wasn't even looking her way, on my orders. Isabella is MINE, only for my eyes, for my hands, for my tongue, for my cock. What happened that night...wasn't some sordid orgy, behind your back, to hurt you. It was...special, and your version of events won't ever come close to destroy what it meant to those that were involved in it.

To sum it all up, Jas is bisexual, he fell for you, but he will have me in his life until he wishes so. Right now, I'm all he has, since you've been a real bitch. If you hit him once again on his face, I will not hold back, even though you're a woman."

Her face is ashen, and some tears are running down her cheeks.

"Why?"

I look directly into her eyes.

My tone still cold, unyielding.

"Why what?"

She turns, giving me a view of her back.

Her shirt is slashed, and I can see her tattoos all over her back.

Her only redeeming quality, her ink looks meaningful.

Not some chick into hearts and stars.

"Why is my Jas broken? Why does he need you so?... Will I ever be enough?"

She is silently sobbing.

Her questions hit the spot.

And I see that Jas has kept her pretty much in the dark.

It wasn't fair to Midget.

And I decide to take pity on her.

"His icy, dragon bitch of a mother decided to molest him and when he was old enough to fuck him. When it was too late, he was taken from her and put in a home for boys...there's where we met. October 15, 2002, it's been marked on my skin never to be forgotten."

Midget is stiff as a board.

Only her breathing indicates she's still alive.

"She is dead? If not, we are going to kill her right now."

Her face is right on my face, somehow she has moved and is in front of me.

Nostrils flaring, heart-rate skyrocketing and fists clenched, Midget is ready for a fight.

I laugh.

This Midget I can get used to.

"Don't strain a muscle, Midget. That bitch is long gone, dead. Unfortunately, her wounds are deep and engrossing on her victim. We just have to help me, everyday.

Everyday.

Just like I need my Isabella.

Everyday of forever.


	49. But what about blood?

**-:::::-**

Truth be told, Midget won me over.

She had spunk and redeemable qualities after all.

As long as she didn't hurt Jas anymore, I was content.

But he and I need to have words...the shit his pulled has to stop.

Keeping his past from the woman he so-called the One, needed to know about his degenerate of a mother.

And I'm thankful once again for Isabella.

She was so perceptive of our dynamic, and so accepting of our relationship.

The jury is still out, on whether Midget will accept that part.

"You are still an asshole. But I can see why Isabella is smitten with you...in retrospect you are perfect for her. I'm happy she's found you, and I guess you need her more than she'll ever need you. So be mindful of her feelings, don't take things for granted and make her happy. Or else...I'll be seeing you, Edward or Masen whatever your name is, and I'll kick your ass in your fucking Fight Club. Yeah, that's right I know about it. Someone is not so keen on keeping up to your rules, but I believe you have bigger things to worry about, eh? Later, I have a shift at the diner."

With that Midget left.

Jas looked at her form as she passed without a glance his way.

It might as well be a dagger pushed into his heart.

Truth be told I wanted to hit him.

Too bad I couldn't go for a session tonight... or in the near future.

Which brought to mind the fucking Volturi match.

Carl was planning something behind my back, Em and Riley were on it.

Jas must know, but won't say shit.

Isabella is too busy with taking care of me and her impending visit to her Pop's aka ATF Agent.

Yeah, I still can't shake that.

**-:::::-**

"Hey Jas... I need to talk with you. Isabella, can you give us a moment. Then I want you in my bed."

Isabella rolls her eyes and continues to watch the big screen that's on some program called Steven and Chris... they are cooking and she seems interested in the recipe.

Good, that means I can talk and not be worried I'm neglecting her.

I caught the message, Midget was giving me.

Even though my Isabella was so accepting she could feel left out and unneeded.

Hopefully I could balance out this clusterfuck I was at the moment.

Jas looks like his on death row and almost floats towards my room.

"It's over. No need to sugarcoat it. She's done and it's my fault. I need-"

"Shut the fuck up! You are responsible. Take it as a man. You had to tell her. The truth, Jasper, she needed to hear it from you. But I've taken it up myself to clean up the mess, since I had my part in it. It doesn't mean you are exempt of talking with Mid- I mean Alice. She's hurt that you didn't trust her...that you didn't share your inner demons with her. As for us...I don't know if she'll handle it. Maybe she needs time. Oh, by the way how the fuck does she know about Fight club?"

Jas squints and shrugs.

"It seems Fight club is getting around...those fucking Volturi. Or maybe it was James and his pussy Laurent. So, getting back to Alice...you think I should give her time... how much time? Fuck, I really fucked up!"

He sits at the end of my bed and pulls off his hair.

I miss my hair.

I knee at his feet and look up at his eyes.

Shiny with tears.

"Don't give up just yet...she loves you, somehow you got her good. She's been warned and if that doesn't scare her, you got her."

He leans down and kisses my lips.

"I won't leave you...ever. If she can deal... then it's truly over. No fretting over spilled milk."

But what about blood?


	50. I wanted him to have it

-:::::-

"You know I want to so bad...but Isabella..."

He shakes his head.

"I know. It's not fair, for us to...but shit I need to feel you."

I nuzzled my face on his chest, taking in his scent.

It was like a balm to my spirit, something that has been part of me.

"I think your Isabella is amazing...the way she knows you. It's unreal. That is how I know she's yours, meant for you. No one will ever fit like that."

"Except you."

I saw his cheeks redden, and I wanted to bite them.

How unlike us to act this way.

We were past all shyness and awkwardness.

It was unseemly.

"I'll be fine. You took care of me, even when it wasn't your job, Masen. I hope Alice can forgive me. I really do. I wasn't kidding, when I said I felt she was my fit. I know you never worried about having a normal life, getting married and having a family. Secretly I've yearned for the possibility to have that, to be able to fit in. Not every family has to be rotten and corrupted. I want the possibility of fatherhood, and see that child grow in a world better than mine. I can make that possible. But it doesn't mean I'm rejecting what I've lived with you...that would make me hypocrite and a liar. It's just complicated and maybe I'm aiming to high. Only time will tell I guess."

He shrugged like it was nothing at all.

But I knew his hopes were set in this working, in this becoming a reality.

I wanted him to have it.

Maybe I would be able to have it as well.

If Isabella stayed the course and didn't dump my ass.

Or her father shot off my head. Whatever came first.

I knew her departure was near, she would be leaving to visit Mr. Charlie Swan.

"Did you know Isabella's father was an ATF agent? She wants to visit him, and in my condition I can't go with her. She'll be gone a couple of days."

Jas laughed.

"You don't want to be apart from her. Isn't that adorable. She told me he would help us. I didn't say anything...well it was her story to tell. Don't pout, it makes me crazy."

What's with the adorable comment?

I was seriously questioning the operation.

It may have done irreparable damage and may have lost my cred.

If the guys found out I'd be massacred.

"You better keep this to yourself. I have a reputation to uphold."

Jas smirked in mirth.

"You don't have to worry too much about that. Remember Fight Club will soon be disbanded. We can't keep it up, with the Volturi snooping and revealing our operation to the law. Besides you are our leader, and now that you have to step down is only just. It is time, Masen. We need to face the fact our rebellious stage has long passed. We are no longer teenagers. I won't say it will not be missed, but is necessary to end it."

I got up and turned to leave the room.

This conversation was over and the mood was clearly gone.

"Don't be crossed with me. I'm not your enemy. You have to face it. Fight Club is over. Carl is doing the last sessions and talking with the guys. This last fight will be the final showdown. It seems proper to end it by kicking those bitches asses, don't you think? Some good will come out of that. Em will get the girl, god-willing. And if Isabella gets her dad to side with us, you might get the girl of your dreams literally."

"Well, aren't you sweet. Yeah, yeah, blah, blah. You and Carl will bore me to death. See you later."

With that I left the room.


	51. I wanted her to stay here

Isabella was waiting for me, sitting on the couch.

"Carl is taking me to Alice's apartment. She called. I was surprised, but she said she will take me to Forks. She will help me persuade Charlie. It will work with Alice there...she's his favorite. Don't ask me why. I'll be gone two days tops. Think you can manage to stay alive while I'm gone?"

I grunted my response.

"I'll try."

"Come here."

I tried to keep to myself that I felt I bit dizzy.

Later I will tell Carl, it was probably normal.

I sat beside her.

Looking at her bottomless eyes, I wanted to tell her to stay.

We would manage on our own, as always.

But I knew it would end probably with more than one death.

Mine was a sure one.

Strangely, I wasn't scared of that.

I was more scared of meeting the end of the gun of Isabella's father.

His approval suddenly felt important.

I've never wanted or needed anyone's blessing, but right now I wanted his.

She sat astride on my lap, still looking into my eyes.

"It's okay to love Jas...I won't come between you. But I need to know you need me, as much as you need him. I don't know if I can bear seeing the love I feel for you die in your gaze..."

I took hold of her hands stopping them from retracting from my face.

"Never. You are imprinted here. There's no one who'll be able to take your mark. Jas knows. He always knows. As long as you don't want him to part from me, there will be no reason to fear."

One of her hands touched where my heart was beating.

Her other hand cleared her tears.

"Wait for me. I'll be counting the hours, minutes and seconds until I'm back in your arms."

I felt conflicted over letting her go.

"You better come back."

She winked at me, trying to placate my anxiety.

Carl opened the door.

He looked frustrated and angry.

I didn't know if I should bait for the answer.

One could be Esme was withholding.

Another could be Aro has been giving demands.

That one set me on edge.

That fucking sick bastard, how I wished I could end him.

Once upon a time, I thought I would have the pleasure.

Fucking bleeding brain had to fuck it up.

Still, so far I was scheduled to make an appearance.

That hadn't changed yet...

The dreaded date was fast approaching and I was on the recuperating stage.

How I was gonna pull this off, it was still a mystery.

"Are you ready Isabella?"

I noticed she had a bag by the door.

While Jas and I were pouring our hearts out, my Isabella was getting ready.

I felt my heart constrict.

Something so very important was leaving me...But she would return.

I was tempted to call Midget and sent my best wishes.

I refrained we were still not best girlfriends.

It was best not to push it.

"How have you been feeling since I last saw you? Any headaches? Dizzy spells? Did you take your pills?"

Did I tell him?

He would probably panic and then Isabella wouldn't leave.

That wouldn't be so bad...focus Edward.

"Fine. My Isabella has been taking extra care of me. Now that she's leaving, I may starve."

She poked her tongue out.

Fuck...don't do that baby.

She stopped and then blushed.

She knew me so well...Jas was totally right.

Carl huffed annoyed.

Yep, Nurse Esme wasn't open for business.

Hmm...

"Edward? Hellooo?"

"Sorry, what?"

"I won't be back until probably midnight. Jas is staying with you?"

"I guess. Em isn't here. So Jas will take nurse duty."

Isabella giggled.

And her breast jiggled.

Fuck, you better leave or I'll strap you to the bed.

I was standing regretting the reason.

It was a brief goodbye, but I was still hesitant.

On her tiptoes she brushed her lips to mine.

"Be good...and if you want to be with him. Be together. I love you."

I closed my eyes.

It was too much.

She was too much to be real.

I opened my eyes and looked towards Carl.

If he was here, was all this real?

I hadn't fell out of sorts since that dream...but she was surreal.

She went out the door.

"I'll take her, don't worry. Edward, just stay calm. I don't need to receive a call from Jas saying you had an episode and lost consciousness. That would be very counterproductive to your recovery."

I only nodded.

I had no words.

I felt like part of me had left with her.

It wouldn't return until she was back here.

I wanted her to stay here.

Hopefully she would agree.

**-:::::-**


	52. It has always been that way

I go Jas' hunting and find he's in one of his moods in his room.

Sitting alone in his favorite chair.

Strumming his guitar, his gaze distant.

He might as well be miles away.

I enter and sit on his bed and rest against the headboard.

It's cushioned, so it didn't dig into my spine.

"Bella left?"

He still kept playing a chord over and over.

I didn't recognize the song.

"Yes."

I averted my eyes.

I was feeling miffed she had left me.

And worried about the outcome of her visit with her father.

"You miss her already."

It wasn't a question.

"She gave her permission."

This caught his attention.

He stop playing in mid note.

"Permission?"

"To fuck you, while she was away."

Jas turned his eyes back to his guitar.

No ruffled feathers.

I shrugged.

But he wasn't quiet for long.

"How thoughtful. But then nothing stops you from what you want. I guess she said it as an afterthought. In way to give you a fuck-Jasper-guilty-free weekend."

"Don't be an asshole. She deserves better from you. I thought you felt some kinship with her, bonded with her. Haven't you been pushing she's the one for me? She's not Midget. I'm sorry she had such a reaction. But it's your fucking fault in the first place. If you would've been honest with her-"

"Like you were with Isabella? You don't even remember her. You still don't recollect how the fuck did you meet her. So don't act so high and mighty with me."

What the fuck?

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

The guitar is left forgotten on the floor.

He strides towards me.

"You are what's wrong with me."

His mouth mashes with mine, teeth clashing and tongues fighting for dominance.

I wanted to hold him off.

I wanted an explanation.

But he wouldn't have it.

"Isabella knows you...but I've known you forever. And right now, you are mine."

Can I say... what the fuck?

Jas seems possessed.

I wanted to reassure him.

"Jas...this won't be the last time."

"How do you know?"

I bit his upper lip.

"She loves me. I know that scares you. It scares me."

His hazel eyes were wet.

I knew it would hit him.

Midget's rejection was hard on him.

I was his only safety net.

"I can't live without you...I won't."

I brushed his hair back, still looking at him.

"You won't, for as long as I draw breath."

He chuckled.

"Don't make any promises you may not be able to keep."

I huffed.

"Stop it. Just fucking stop."

I took him into my arms, as he sat straddling my legs.

His mouth tasted of his salty tears.

"I'll make it better."

With no surprise we ended naked and spooning.

"I like it when you are inside me. I don't feel alone. I belong to you at this very moment."

I just nuzzled his neck.

I felt depleted of energy after our needed joining.

"I know. It has always been that way."

He turned his face towards me, his eyes searching.

"Will it always be that way?"

I do hope so.

**-:::::-**


	53. I somehow find you and I collide

"Take me to Fight Club."

Jas just gazed at me.

"Take me to Fight Club."

He sneered this time.

"Why the fuck would I do that? You can't fight. There's no point."

This is not the end of this discussion.

"I need to show my face. I need to show the Volturi that I'm around. They have to be wondering where the fuck I've being doing lately, don't you think? I can't let them think we are a bunch of pussies. We have to show a united front, that we are together and ready to face them. Don't worry I'll just watch."

Jas chuckled and shook his head.

"Since when have you only watched? You will not be able to resist and then someone challenges you...you won't be able to back down. You never back down from a fight even if you know you won't be the victor. Carl will be there by now, he won't be happy with your presence."

"Fine. Let Em try to get me out. In the end you'll see it will serve us. I need to show my face, say it's only a scratch and I'll be good as new next week."

"At least you can fuck again. That has to be a good sign, right?"

Fucker.

"You want me to prove it to you, again?"

We were both laughing.

It felt good, to laugh with him.

I felt like we were young again...maybe not as fucked as we used to be. Then again there's room for more in the horizon.

"Play for me."

As naked as he was, he stood and got his guitar.

I thought he would return to the bed, but instead he went to his favorite chair and started strumming.

He looked pensive.

I almost regretted asking him to play.

Nothing would've prepared me to what he started to play.

_The dawn is breaking_

_A light shining through_

_You're barely waking_

_And I'm tangled up in you, yeah_

I feel like my throat is closing up.

_I'm open, you're closed_

_Where I follow, you'll go_

_I worry I won't see your face_

_Light up again_

_Even the best fall down sometimes_

_Even the wrong words seem to rhyme_

_Out of the doubt that fills my mind_

_I somehow find you and I collide_

The words are so spot on, describing what we are to each other. But somehow it's just too much all that once and I feel like I'm drowning on my own emotions.

_I'm quite you know_

_You make a first impression_

_I've found I'm scared to know_

_I'm always on your mind_

_Don't stop here _

_I lost my place_

_I'm close behind_

He abruptly stops playing.

He is in front of me and holds my face.

"I love you. I can't help it, but I fear it will not be enough. I don't want to be a burden you need to carry for the rest of your life. If you need me to go...I'll do as you ask."

He lingers and rests his forehead on mine.

We look into each others eyes.

"Don't. Just don't ever say you are leaving. Isabella understand better than us, I think. As for Mid-, I mean Alice, there's more behind that façade she shows us. Give her time. I think she's good for you."

"Are you worried about her?"

"I'm more worried about me...I think Agent Charlie Swan won't welcome me into the family.

His hand touches my cheek and I notice I have shed tears.

He gives me a smile and follows with licking my tears.

I shove him off.

And somehow that lightens the mood.

I hover over him and brush my lips on his.

"What would I be without you?"

Jasper's visage turns serious, his eyebrows going up.

"I bet you would be a famous serial killer...having killed the scum of the city. In retrospect doing a service to the community. Maybe I should have stayed away from you."

I get close and bite his lower lip.

"Stop trying to get me to fuck you. We need to get cleaned up and ready for tonight's session, don't think you can distract me."

He pouts.

"Well, I fucking tried."

I decided to give in.

Can you blame me?

**-:::::-**


	54. I had just broken my own rules

Somehow, I finally convinced Jas to take me to tonight's session.

I knew the consequences if I didn't keep out of it, but let's just say I had an itch that needed scratching.

Apparently all the fucking I had done hadn't satisfied the It inside me.

It missed the atmosphere that Fight Club entailed.

What was I without the Rules?

I might as well be dead.

"Just keep to a corner, look serious...like your watching and scouting for a match. But for fuck's sake don't start shit you can't finish. Fuck...Carl is gonna kill me for sure."

I rolled my eyes at Jas' melodramatic take on life.

No wonder he liked Midget.

Thinking about her, in turn made me think of Isabella.

I wanted her here in my arms.

If only she hadn't gone, maybe I would've stayed put... maybe.

A nondescript basement from what it seemed an abandoned and probably condemned building was our set up for tonight.

I could smell the urine and decay lingering in the air.

It was like a welcome mat, saluting me back to Fight Club.

The board was full of the already set matches.

Carl was fighting Jacob... that asshole deserves to be the Cullen treatment.

Such an arrogant fuck, but nonetheless he has his moments.

Em was beating the shit out of Felix.

He was coughing up a lung and limping.

Nice.

I saw some new faces and they were already speculating who the fuck I was.

I just glared back.

Tonight's group was egging on, most rooting for Em.

He was everyone's favorite, even after he had beaten you unconscious.

I guess it was all in his personality.

I couldn't say the same about me, but that is the point.

Carl had been keeping track of the fight going on until he saw me.

His face changed colors and I thought he was having a conniption.

He strode my way, when he spotted Jas beside me.

He was hissing and trying to keep his voice down.

"What the fuck are you doing here? A fucking death wish! Jasper what do you understand by fucking bed rest? I thought you fucking loved my baby brother! Fuck my life! I should pummel you to death."

There he was overusing the word fuck, I just wanted to crack up.

"Don't think I don't know this is your scheming and I'm sure you have a wonderful justification for your presence here tonight. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. I don't want to hear it. You stay, you keep to yourself and don't start shit with anyone, understand? Or I'll be the one proffering punishment."

I nodded acknowledging his words.

Truthfully, I simply wanted to be back.

Now, I was wishing I had stayed away.

Temptation was right at my fists' tips.

Carl left us and went back to his post.

He really liked to be in-charge, but won't admit it.

Jas was debating whether to stay by my side, or sign up for a one-one.

I gave him the signal to scatter.

It simply wouldn't do if he stayed by my side all night.

Meanwhile, Em was really enjoying slugging that Volturi trash.

Felix went down, he didn't move.

Em stood back and looked towards Carl.

He made the call, it was done.

After a couple of minutes, Felix got up.

He kept spitting blood on the floor.

It wasn't a secret that I was smirking.

Em came over after getting congratulations from his adoring fans.

"Hey Ed! I bet Carl is ready to punch something really bad. What did you do to Jas? Brain-fucking him into getting you here? Don't answer! Anyway is good to see you out and about. Did you see the mug on Felix after I gave him a re-arranging? I'm sure he'll be mouthing off to that bastard. No worries, I can take him blindfolded."

Em had confidence to spare, nothing scared him away from a fight.

I really hoped he would win and get the girl.

"Have you seen...her?"

This changed his disposition immediately.

"No...I haven't seen her. If he has marked her, I swear-"

"Em don't jump the bridge yet. First, you need to win the fight, then win the girl."

He gave me his best dimpled smirk.

"Pfft. Done deal. I'll be back, gonna clean up a bit."

As he moved around the room towards the back, more members congratulated him on his win.

"Well if is not the missing Cullen back from vacation... I thought you were dead, man. Gonna fight tonight? Damn I wished I would've known, that way I would be fighting you instead of your brother."

Fucking Jacob.

If only I could beat his ass.

"No need to get a hard-on. I'm staying out of the list tonight."

"Cullen don't test me, I might forget something important."

I got right on his face, no fucking pup was gonna intimidate me.

The clicks inside my head were riling me up.

"You listen. You wanna be here, you follow the rules. No questions. No exceptions. You can't follow the rules, you get Rule number 9. Now get out of my face."

He moved back, but never averted eye contact.

He wasn't really backing down.

If shit got real, I would have to fight.

From the periphery, I could see Jas was ready to step in.

If he did my rep would be ruined.

He was trying his best not to jump the gun.

"Fine. Live by the rules and all that bullshit."

His fight wasn't next, so he kept walking, only it didn't stop his rotting mouth.

"Masen now has a guard dog, or should I say his pussy? Maybe getting fucked in the ass has ruined his aim."

Blinding rage coursed through me and what happened next was like so fast I didn't register the consequences.

I clocked him on his jaw, causing his face to whip back.

A circle formed instantaneously around us.

I had just broken my own rules...

But all I saw and heard kept me focused on knocking him out.

The roar of the crown was deafening.

It was like they missed me and were happy to see.

The It inside me was rejoicing in the sweat, the violence, and the blood.

I hadn't let him hit back, if he did I was risking my life.

Was this worth it?

In the maelström of sounds, I finally heard Carl's voice ordering the pack of angry wolves at my feet.

"STEP BACK! STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!"

Somehow, his words registered inside our rage bubble, and the men started to step back.

I stopped my attack, feeling my bruised knuckles.

I was out of breath, hunched over letting my hands land on my thighs.

If I had kept going I would've passed out from the effort.

"A little out of shape there, Cullen. You better get on the game... not much time left."

His voice and his words, made me wish I had any strength left so I could bash his teeth in.

Felix knew what he was doing, setting the stage.

He walked away, like everybody else.

Tonight's session was officially over.

"Don't let him bait you. Fuck! You had to fight. I knew I shouldn't have listen to you."

Jacob was on his side, his breathing getting back to normal.

"Not bad, Masen. But we will meet again, and I'll show you who's better."

There was no self-destruct button for this asshole.

"You both are banned from fighting until further notice. Edward leave. Em will you help me close up, I don't want the cops getting a whiff of this place."

Jas put his arm around me, pushing forward.

I was dizzy and nauseated, a wonderful combination.

"Can you stand? I think you are about to collapse. The good news, Isabella called. Bad news, you didn't answer it. Who knows what she's thinking."

"An angry Isabella faraway is no consolation at all."

"No make-up sex? Figures."

Damn.

**-:::::-**


	55. We'd become Romeo and his Mercutio

My cell had ten missed calls, twenty text messages and one voicemail.

I cringed at the sight.

This didn't look good for me.

I decided to hear the message.

Jas was chuckling, the fucking bastard was enjoying a bit too much my misery.

"Edward, it's Bella. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU? If you don't call in the next five minutes...I'm gonna beat your ass. I don't care that you are sick. I'm betting you went to you know where...I can't say anymore. My dad is nearby and he is having a blast with my little meltdown. He is already predicting we are breaking up. So, please don't prove him right.

Yours."

I looked to the side, since I didn't want Jas to see that my eyes had watered.

From all of that, her "yours" was enough.

I whispered back, "Yours, baby."

"So, are you gonna need me to take blame for tonight's fiasco?"

"No. It was my idea. Felix saw and he was satisfied that I'm still around. Even if I'm not in top shape yet."

He huffed and kept driving.

I missed being on my own, this depending on people was grating on my patience.

"You need to work tomorrow, right?"

Jas turned his gaze for just a second.

"Don't get ideas...after tonight I won't be surprised if Carl doesn't strap you to the bed. We know he has the hardware for it."

Fuck, that's a mental picture.

"Jas don't fucking bring that up. Really, I don't need to picture my brother getting kinky with that knockout Nurse Esme. Didn't you get the itch to hit that ass?"

Jas smirked and shook his head.

"Masen you will never change. I remember you wanting to touch her ass back in that hospital room. Carl wouldn't have been pleased and she told you herself. Not even Isabella can tame you that much."

"Have you ever tried?"

Silence.

"No. I want you...and accept you as you are. Even though sometimes I want to beat it out of you. Remember the first night we started Fight Club?"

How could I forget?

It was the first time I got really slugged and beaten by no other than Jasper Whitlock, my best friend and comrade in arms.

"You cheated."

"What? Are you fucking kidding me? Want me to call Em to refresh your memory? Don't be a motherfucker, Masen and admit defeat. Tonight is another night you would've lost..."

"Has Mid-Alice called you?"

Through gritted teeth Jas spat, "Don't change the subject. Do you know what you did? You put yourself in harm's way as if nothing is wrong. If you think any of us wouldn't have stopped it and pummeled any of those assholes you are so wrong. Fuck the rules and fuck Fight Club.

Your life is worth it and more. Carl was ready to intervene, he used his position and thankfully you stopped before that fucker Jacob got up and put your light's out."

Now, his eyes welled with tears he denied himself to spill.

"You are so selfish. If Bella was there what would've been your reaction? The same. I know you, I just am to weak against you. But I can't allow you to have the upper hand again."

I stayed silent, nothing I could say would change the outcome of tonight's events.

I simply fucked up and let my need to rage take over.

The It was fed, satisfied for the moment.

"If you stop fighting will you miss the release?"

I had to ask.

"Is that what worries you?"

Well, yeah it fucking bothers me.

I gave him my answer, but he didn't say his.

"Yes. I need this. Just what happened proves that if I'm not letting this out, it will just find its way to explode."

Jas parked the car. Then proceeded to rest his forehead on the steering wheel, I heard his sigh.

"It seems we have to find a way for you to be ready for the fight...but also ready to leave this all behind. It is the only way for Isabella and you to succeed."

"Did you really mean when you said you would leave...if I asked you to?"

"Yes. If you are selfish, then so am I. But I can't keep you forever...even if I want to."

I locked my eyes with his.

How can you forget what we've lived through, what has gone between us?

Suppress the feelings and the regrets.

I had no secrets and neither did he.

We had been all each other had.

That is why Carl never got between us.

He understood and respected our connection.

Some said it was survival, that we had established an unhealthy relationship based on co-dependancy to the point that we'd become Romeo and his Mercutio.

I had always defended us against the system and their views.

At this moment, I wasn't so assured.

Maybe they were right to point fingers and say we needed to learn to cope on our own, without resorting to our usual ways.

I feared it would be sooner, rather than later.

**-:::::-**


	56. The world of masculinity and rage-aholic

"Isabella? Hello?"

Silence.

I was ready to grovel and beg.

Promise her marriage, children, a white picket fence and walk-in-closets, fucking twin set of washer and dryer if it would please her.

"Finally decided to face the firing squad I see... Where were you?"

Um... shit.

"I did something really stupid, but it's needed and I promise it will be enough until the date of the meeting arrives. I'm sorry, baby. I really am... Carl is gonna punish me for sure and I'm in one piece-"

I can hear her rapid breathing and I know this isn't over.

Damn it to hell.

"Are you home then? Did you measure each other's dicks to your heart's content? All is good in the world of masculinity and rage-aholics-r-us? Motherfucking wonderful. If something did happened what would have been your excuse? Oh sorry Isabella I got a hard-on for getting my head bashed in by some fuck with a corresponding prick ready for my ass... I can't even keep talking, I'm so pissed. I really wanna hang up on you and simply stay awhile in Forks."

I felt my throat close up.

She was going to leave things as is?

She was in Forks... we were going there... she might be in danger if Aro's crew got a whiff of her.

I hadn't lost sight of that possibility.

Aro would enjoy seeing me squirm and give in to his demands.

Maybe it would be good if she stayed there.

Or maybe it would be good if I went there.

Stake out the place, do some reconnaissance.

It would be stupid go into this battlefield blind.

"Do you mean you need... a time-out?"

"Edward what are we three-year-olds? I think I need to get my dad into complying with the plan. He is off tomorrow, so I'll be able to coerce him into seeing things my way. Nothing beats getting a dad to do what his baby girl wants him to. Just stay put, I'll call with details of my mission. As for us... I love you and I know you are not accustomed to sharing your life with someone. Well, maybe not someone like me."

So that was being addressed.

My long-term relationship with Jas.

"Baby you don't need to-"

The door of my bedroom crashed into the wall and in the doorway stood a very enraged Carl.

"GET. OFF. THE. FUCKING. PHONE. NOW.!"

"Shit, what did you do? Call me later, Edward."

The line went off.

I immediately regretted losing her voice, in no hurry to get what was coming to me.

Carl was huffing and swearing under his breath.

"How am I supposed to keep you alive? If you keep this up, Edward, I might just get my money's worth paying up a funeral service with all the perks. I have a mind to simply put you away myself, face Aro and become his new hot bitch. What is the point in my life? To survive, to be better than what my life was headed."

"What do you do? Fuck things up and lead us into the shit-hole we came out of. What do the people who love you see in you? Did you think of Isabella? Of Jasper? Of Emmett? OF ME?! Of course, you didn't. You only think of yourself and your needs. That fucking brain of yours is stuck in reverse ready to send you in a downward-spiral into an early grave."

"You are only twenty-five years old and what do you have to show for it? Absolutely nothing. I want and expect more from you."

He was breathless and I was fucking glad.

I was sick of his sanctimonious bullshit.

"Are you done? 'Cause I am all warmed up for my turn, and since I can't punch you deaf-dumb and stupid, I'll use my words. I know what I am and what I am not. I don't expect to fulfill your ideals and expectations. And you know what I DON'T FUCKING CARE, get over it and move on. We both lived through shit that marked us and determined somehow how we would live in this world."

"You chose to move above it, but did you really Carl? What the fuck are you doing beating emasculated, dissatisfied, under-privilege fucks every night? Don't give me a fucking lecture, 'cause clearly your moral compass is a bit out of whack. I live my life in a day-to-day basis, some days are better than others. Right now this one isn't one of the good ones."

"First, my Isabella isn't here to fuck my brains out. She's pissed the fuck off with me at the moment as well. So kudos for me. Secondly, Jas is not so hot with me either, the only person I trust as much as you. I might be losing him for good, if he thinks that midget in heels is worth his time. And you know what? She might be."

"I don't hold illusions over my potential. I know I'm this close to losing my fucking mind, it is barely holding by a thread. And you come in here judging and ready to send me to my death? Be my guest, and join the line, for I am open all night."

He was making eye contact, but I noticed the tears down his face.

"If that's how you see yourself... then I've failed you as a brother."

I frowned, confused at his statement.

"No, you have been there for me. It isn't your fault our parents died. There's no place for what-ifs and this isn't a film on the wonderful experiences of ennui. You couldn't save me from it all, but you have tried to make-up for it ever since. I want the best for you, always. Now, do your doctor's duty and check my blood pressure and the shit you do every night."

He tried to smile, but it was not even close.

It was then I knew it was real.

I could die and my brother wouldn't be able to stop it.


	57. Carpe diem, and all that shit

"I want you to listen to me...I think I should go stake out Forks. I have nothing better to do. You can come later, closer to the date of the showdown. This way I can be close to Isabella, just for when Aro has set his eyes on her. We need to cover all bases. I don't trust these fucks for trying some underhanded maneuver to hold over us, and control the outcome."

Carl tried to hide the tears that had escaped unwillingly.

"Who's gonna drive you there? I can't take off time now, only if I say you are dying...I guess we can get Jasper to take you. This might work for the best. Alice is there with Bella, right?"

Fuck, I hadn't thought about _that_ problem.

No matter, I needed to be close to my Isabella.

I would face death, Aro and his boys, and certainly a cold-hard bitch like Midget.

:::

Jas was giving me the silent treatment, huffing and cursing under his breath.

It didn't matter, we had to get over our shit and move on.

I risked my life to prove a point.

The point was made.

Now, I had to see that Isabella was safe.

Even if her father was better equipped.

"Will you drive me there? If you don't want to stay that's fine...I know she's there, and it might be too early for the needed confrontation between the two of you to happen-"

"Shut the fuck up! I'll take you to Forks, even if it feels like goodbye, like this is the end. I will do it, 'cause its what you want...even if it kills you or us. I will do it for you."

I did not know how to answer that.

Was it the end?

The end of what, exactly?

Was I walking directly to my death?

Or was he referring to the end of our relationship as it has stood for the last ten years?

I most surely did not have the answers to these questions.

I could only plan my next step, and then see what my next step should be.

I had no foresight for what the future would bring.

_Carpe diem_, and all that shit.

"I'll pack some shit and we can go then. Only I don't know where I'll stay...I mean I can't expect the chief will be happy to see me sleep in his daughter's bed?"

Finally, Jas started to laugh.

His laughter felt like a balm to my soul.

Somehow it was hope, and I would embrace such light in my darkness.

"You worry over stupid nothing, and the things that matter you forget. I'm sure we can find somewhere to crash-"

"Does that mean you are staying with me?"

He sighed and his eyes seemed to be reading me, taking it all in.

"Yes. I won't leave you...it would be careless and unforgiving of me to just drop you off. You still need to be under constant supervision and I don't trust you will stay still. Emmett said he will come tomorrow and see us there. Riley will probably come with Em as well. Carl will be the last to join us... Don't you fret, your brother has all this planned out, if Bella can't convince her father...we have an alternate solution."

Instantly I knew that alternate remedy was someone going in my place.

"No."

Jasper gritted his teeth and fucking growled.

"Don't fucking start, Masen. You keep fucking quiet, you will abide your brother's authority and live. That is all I am asking. What happens after that...it is on fate's hands to decide. All I need is for you to live."

Another grown man was trying to clear his tears without me noticing them.

It made me feel like trying to check if I still had a pulse.

Had I died and simply decided to stay here and hunt people?

Was I gonna meet some kid and he would tell me, "Hey fucker you dead, move the fuck on."

My version of The Sixth Sense.

"I'll try, Jas."

He shook his head, knowing I would not promise more than that.

:::

"Hey Isabella? Um...Are you home?"

Jasper was holding his giggles.

He really was enjoying my discomfort.

"Why? Oh, don't tell you...You didn't! Fuck! Edward! Damn, I just calmed my dad and now you are here? Alice, can you believe it? I'm sure he's with Jasper, since he needs to be driven everywhere. Where you at? I'll give the address. Stupid fucking men. ARGH!"

Was I pussy-whipped that I found her rant adorable?

And somehow all I wanted was for her to ride my cock until we both collapsed.

"I bet all you are thinking is getting laid by that hellcat of a girlfriend. I'm happy for you. If only I had worked things out with...Alice. Tell me the street, we must be close in a town like this."

Not five minutes later we're parked right in front of Agent Charlie Swan's house.

And he was home, and he had company.

A twenty-something looking, agent with handsome looks and a winning smile.

The _It_ wanted satisfaction.

I wanted an explanation.

"Dad don't shoot him. Remember, I love him."

This might as well be a taped episode of Jerry Springer, featuring dead-beat punk gets shot by law enforcement father.

And this intruder was loving it all, bulging biceps and gun.

He was going down.


	58. Agent Happy Face

Jasper decided to stay by the car and was leaning on it, looking calm and collected.

I was anything but calm and collected.

I wanted blood.

And a fucking explanation.

Isabella moved as quickly as she could to stand right in between her father and I.

"Dad...You said you would behave, and you agreed you would help us. You even got AGENT CLAPTON DAVIS here to aid. So drop the macho act already."

Mr. Swan gave one last huff and put his gun down.

The other man was still smiling, like we were all old friends.

I still wanted to flatten him to the ground, and I was barely controlling the impulse.

I was processing the fact that Isabella had come through for us.

Her father was going to help us bring down the Volturi.

What I didn't get was the presence of the agent...Clapton Davis.

Isabella finally turned around and looked intensely into my eyes.

"You couldn't be away from me for just a few days, eh? Come here..."

She didn't have to tell me twice.

Without hesitation I attacked her mouth, taking her tongue and practically swallowing it into mine.

"Missed you, baby...so much."

A throat clearing caused my Isabella to detach herself from me, and I fucking growled in response.

"I'm agent Charlie Swan and this is agent Davis. My daughter has... persuaded me to cooperate in this take-down. I have contacted friends of mine in the Bureau, they'll be standing by. This is a great opportunity to free this state of that garbage, Aro Volturi and his criminal organization.

However, this doesn't mean I approve of your relationship with my only daughter. If one hair is hurt from her head, I will use any means necessary to end you. I'm sure Davis here will help in the destruction of any evidence left and I mean NO ONE will ever know of you ever again, understand?"

I heard Jasper trying to quiet his giggles, like a fucking school girl.

Let's see how he laughs when he faces Midget, fucker.

I was having trouble answering back.

"Yes, sir. I-I wouldn't intentionally hurt Isabella...I-Iove her, sir."

So much for eloquence and charm.

"See that you don't hurt her AT ALL. We have narrowed down the possible places this showdown will take place. Once you know exactly the place you need to let me know. As for now, I haven't gotten intel referring to strangers roaming around Forks. I'm sure you have already thought Bella might become a target to get your compliance. This grates on my nerves, since you have put my little girl in danger. She needs to be accompanied at all times, no exceptions. Where are you staying?"

I looked at Isabella and she looked back, trying to tell me something I didn't get.

Swan huffed again.

"You don't expect me to welcome you into my home...Davis you have space in your apartment?"

Agent Happy Face gazed first at me, and Jasper second.

"I have room to spare...for you two for a couple of nights."

Swan seemed satisfied with that crisis averted.

"Good, now if you excuse us we need to check with the local police department. Bella, if you need me call me on my mobile, anytime. Alice has to stay with you, it is the only way I'll be comfortable leaving you alone."

As he was speaking, he was giving me the fucking evil eye.

I really didn't think his scowl and mental cursing would damn me more than I was already.

After they got in their car and pulled away, I was able to breathe easier.

"Seriously, Edward? You had to jump in the car and drive all the way here...Fuck! I told you I would call you about the how it had gone with my dad-"

My mouth stopped her and my arms enveloped her close to my chest.

"I need to be close to you, to be sure you are safe...Your father is worried as I am. The Volturi can retaliate against me, using you. You can't expect me to be faraway without tangible proof that you are alive and well. Even if this angers you...You matter so much more-"

She was teary-eyed and sniffing.

"Shut the fuck up...You are crazy."

She nuzzled her nose with mine, and I felt like a complete pussy.

And with witnesses.

Midget had come out, barely dressed in a shirt and shorts.

She seemed lost in thought, like she wanted to be somewhere else, not here facing her lost lover and his baggage.

Jasper was looking flushed and uncomfortable.

For that I'm pleased, as he had enjoyed a bit too much my first meeting with Agent Charlie Swan.

"May I see your room? I think we should let these two talk for a bit?"

Isabella took notice of the tense atmosphere and guided me inside her modest home.

"Tell me...what did you do to get Dr. Cullen so angry at you? Are you hungry, I can make you-"

"I know what I want and what I can make you...come for awhile. What do you say to that Isabella?"

My sweet Isabella was growing bolder and shocked the hell out of me by cupping my cock.

"Is this hard for me? Did it miss my pussy?"

Ahhh, fuck me.

"Yoou, know it was and is hard for you, baby. I miss your pussy. I want all the fucking time..."

She started stroking a bit faster and I was sure I would embarrass myself right there Swan's kitchen.

Abruptly, she stopped.

What the fuck?

She was looking at my face and was giving me her smug face.

"Not in this house, not in my father's home. You will have to control yourself, Edward. Now, tell me what you did."

I pushed her hands and moved away from her.

What did she want from me?

I had come to see her and she turns me away.

I wanted to fuck her, right here at this very spot.

"You can't always get what you want, Edward. Listen to that Stones' song. It's not that I don't want you...because I do. It's just not the time or place. I respect my father's home, even if I'm an adult now and don't live here anymore."

Passive-aggressive behavior show your fucking self.

"Who was that guy? Did you fuck him?"

Her answering glare was burning my skin.

"Are you questioning my loyalty to you? Did you fuck Jasper? Don't fucking answer that... You did or you didn't, I gave you a free pass. That doesn't mean I'm going to take that as an excuse to fuck the next hot guy within my reach. He's my dad's new partner, and he has complied with this crackpots idea I concocted to save your sorry ass with the rest of that damn club. You know what I think you should leave and go back to Seattle. I'm sure your brother is worried, he needs to check your progress and you staying here clearly will not help with your recovery."

"You want me to leave? I just got here, after hours of driving. I'm tired, Isabella. I want to kiss and fuck my girlfriend, that I haven't seen in days. I didn't think that was too much to expect when I finally got you within my grasp. Now, I won't get to do that, and will have to sleep in some agent's apartment...Yeah, maybe I should just go back. Nice seeing you, Isabella."

I turned and walked towards the entrance.

As I slammed the door behind me, my vision turned blurry.

I started to blink my eyes repeatedly, hoping it would clear it.

Only my hearing was guiding me.

"You would've been honest with me, Jasper. I have been totally honest with you. I told you about my past and you held me. Why didn't you think I wouldn't accept you? I fucking loved you! But now...I-I can't deal with this now...I have to take care of my friend. It doesn't mean we are over for good...just give me more time. Can you give me that?"

I tried to steady my ragged breathing.

So Midget wanted more time...Jas was not going to deal well with this.

"I'm sorry, Alice."

The blurriness was dissipating.

Just what I needed to become one of those pansy ass panic attack patients.

Midget touched his cheek, I think she was clearing his tears.

Hers remained untouched on her face, detailing her sorrow.

She did love him, and I felt somewhat guilty of their demise.

"Masen..."

But in the end, he will always come back to me.

"I'm in the dog house, and so are you. Maybe this wasn't the smartest idea."

He walked towards me, until he was right in front of me.

He leaned his forehead on mine and closed his eyes.

"You know what I miss? I miss being sixteen years old, and thinking there was no one else for me, but you. It was my constant fear that you would leave me...it was our promise that had been my saving grace. But what now, what will save me now, Masen?"

I was afraid that maybe I wasn't enough anymore.


	59. It was my turn to give him the finger

If Midget saw us, I simply didn't care.

I had talked to her, tried to explain.

She in return wanted more time.

It was like it had rubbed off on Isabella, as she had rejected me too.

"Should we go back to Seattle? There's really no point staying here now..."

Jas shook his head and got his seatbelt on.

"I think we should stay. We should see the town, have a look on the perimeter as Swan is doing. Maybe we'll see something he has missed."

I nodded.

I was not looking forward to bunking with Agent Clapton "Happy Face" Davis.

"Maybe we find a place to stay as well. I don't think I can control myself."

Jas was chortling now.

"You have the hots for the young agent? I think he's hot, all rugged, law enforcement officer, American killing machine. Wouldn't mind getting a bit...physical with him. I think I could take him down in FC. Damn I miss it, too bad is so close to be over. Maybe I can convince him to fight with me. What do you think, Masen?"

I was sneering back.

He's hot?

Rugged?

American killing machine?

"Don't let her get to you, Jas. I know you are hurting. There's no need for you to try to rile me up. I'm all riled thanks to Isabella alone. I don't need your shit."

Jas only beamed back at me.

He had a plan brewing on that fucked-up brain of his.

I was looking through my window, when I felt it.

His right hand wasn't steering the wheel anymore.

It was on my thigh, going higher.

Fucking bastard.

"Keep your hand to yourself. You don't want to give an old-timer a heart attack."

He didn't desist.

His hand crept higher.

"She left you unsatisfied...I plan on rectifying that."

"Are you insane? While driving? Fucking park the car. Hey, look a diner. Are you hungry? I could eat."

I was trying to distract him and my cock from getting too ahead of ourselves.

"Party pooper."

It seemed the universe was conspiring against us.

Just as we are getting seated, in came two Volturi.

Alec and Demetri.

"Fuck...They are here, Jas. We can't leave."

Jas froze in his seat and his pupils dilated, nostrils flared.

"Don't fucking move. I don't want them to see us. It seems they are ordering to-go. Shit. Maybe we should follow them, see where they have hidden. Swan hadn't gotten a whiff of these fuckers, and clearly they stand out here."

Jas was trying to stay cool, but his fists kept flexing.

He was itching for a fight.

I couldn't blame him, as the _It_ wanted a piece of the action.

Thankfully, their order was ready and they left just as promptly.

"I seriously want this to be over. Who knows maybe we can keep the club, but you certainly can't fight anymore. I guess you'll have to appease yourself with fucking."

Jas was a loud motherfucker and the people seating close by heard every word.

I slapped his forehead.

"Keep your fucking voice down, asshole. Want the town to hear you? I'm pretty sure everyone is here at the moment."

I was wrong.

Agent Swan and Agent Happy Face happened to walk in at this very moment.

"Well now they are."

Jas turned around and smirked.

"What bothers you so much about Agent Clapton Davis? Don't tell me you got all possessive and bitched at Bella? Man, you are an idiot. No wonder you didn't get any."

There was that chortling again.

Swan saw us and came towards our table.

"Seeing the sights? I thought you would've stayed with Bella and eaten there...You already screwed up, eh son?"

A fucking comedian.

I'm not your son.

"We...We decided to familiarize ourselves with the town. And it was a good idea. We have spotted two, they came here and picked up an order."

Swan and fucking Happy Face gave each other grave stares.

"Did they make you out?"

"No I don't think they did. Came in and out, stayed close to the register. I guess we'll be staying."

Swan stared me down.

"I thought that had already been decided upon. You'll be staying with Davis. He needs all the info you guys have on our...target. He will be joining you as part of your group. He needs to be authentic. Oh, good my order is ready. Davis, you should stay here with the boys and chat."

Swan left to get his shit.

But didn't take it all.

He left a turd.

Agent Happy Face took a seat beside Jas, making have to look at his smiling face.

His hazel eyes were staring intensely into mine.

I stared right back, he wasn't going to win in the intimidation contest he had started.

"I can recommend what's best to eat here-"

I wasn't interested in chitchat.

"I don't like you. There. Let's get the introductions out-of-the-way. If you are to pose as a member of our club, you need to be informed of the rules-"

"What can I get you today, Stranger?"

I was about to answer, when Jas kicked me on the shin.

That fucking hurt.

He was jerking his head to the side.

Then I noticed what was going on.

Agent Happy Face had his hand up the waitress' skirt.

She was giggling and looking flushed.

The fucker was finger her right there.

He was gaining points in my book.

"Hello...Teá. I would like to order some pancakes with bacon and orange juice. How about you Jas?"

She turned her attention to me, looking abashed.

Agent Davis wasn't amused.

It was my turn to give him the finger.


	60. A fist-on-fist course on the RULES

I'm stuffed and enjoying the show.

Agent "Wandering Fingers" Davis didn't stop flirting with the waitress.

Our table was the best served one, as she kept asking if we needed anything and refilling our drinks.

Jas was looking more uncomfortable, and I couldn't figure why.

Until it hit me...Midget was a waitress...at a diner.

"Stop moping, it doesn't suit you. Anyway we have work to do, don't we Davis? You need to give him the 411, if he's pulling looking like one of us in a week. One or two shiners on his face might make him authentic."

Calling on his name, left a very disappointed waitress.

Sorry, I'm sure he'll be back for more.

I would, if I was...single.

Shit, Isabella had me by the balls.

"We should go to my apartment, that way you guys get your stuff settled and you can enlighten me on the RULES. You won't give me a few pointers, Cullen?"

Agent Happy Face was mocking me.

He knew I couldn't beat his ass, and that only fueled the It.

"Don't think Jas here won't deck you, he's no fucking pussy. No one in... our club takes pity parties. Only now I'm out, but if I wasn't you'd be out cold and would need that pretty waitress to nurse you back to health. That part I think you would throughly enjoy."

Davis chuckled in response.

"Yeah...I wouldn't mind being taking care of by her. She has a special talent. If only you were not taken by Swan's daughter...fuck me she's hot, so I don't blame you."

He just didn't say... that to me.

I stood up and gave him the signal to get the fuck up.

Fucked-up or not I was going to give him a piece of what I asked for.

"Masen...please don't take the bait. I can handle him myself-"

I didn't listen to the rest.

I was outside, waiting for the cocky son of a bitch to face me.

Through the window I could see he was kissing her neck and touching her ass.

He was fucking shameless.

It was a shame he had a mouth, if not he had the potential to be one of our clan.

Jas strutted towards me, fuming.

"You never stop. I have half a mind to call Bella and tell her what you are about to do. What if he hits you and that's it? Don't you think before you open that mouth of yours? Maybe I should call Carl-"

"You don't mind when I open my mouth and swallow you whole? Stop your bitching and moaning. I'm teaching this pup a lesson, letting him know who's the alpha in this pack. Then he's all yours, since you've salivatd wanting a taste. And if you are my friend you will cancel that call right this moment. Look, he's finally stopped fondling the waitress."

"I guess since I'm the new guy the check is on me...Well I'm ready, give me your best shot, Cullen."

Yes, I may be out of commission but I'll give you my best shot.

He was just standing there with the customary smile, the one I was ready to smear.

I was now standing right in front of him.

I was gonna give him a fist-on-fist course on the RULES.

"The first rule: You do not talk about FIGHT CLUB; second rule: You DO NOT talk about FIGHT CLUB."

I sucker punched on his right side.

He was gonna lose his lunch.

"Third rule: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the fight is over, do you need to say something?"

He straighten himself and looked into my eyes.

"Fourth rule: Only two guys to a fight, no exception. Jas is only observing at the moment."

His breathing ragged.

Maybe I had hit harder than I thought.

I decided to keep him intrigued and swung a right hook to his face.

Hello shiner.

"Fifth rule: One fight at a time."

He's tired of being a punching back and tried to strike back.

I retaliated.

A new shiner was born.

"Sixth rule: No shirts, no shoes."

He got a few hits to my torso, but he knew not to stray higher up.

I was not amused, neither was It.

I didn't like knowing my opponent was taking pity on me.

"Seventh rule: Fights will go on as long as they have to."

Jas was fussing by the side, tempted to step in.

I shook my head.

I had started this and I would end it.

"Eighth rule: If this is your first night at FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight.

I broke his lip and blood stained his shirt.

"And the newest rule, ninth: Break the rules and I break you."

He fell on his ass with my last hook.

"Well, I hope my girl didn't see that...it's kind of a let down to get bloodied up in her presence. I have to up my game if I wanna be part of your...club. Nine rules. Got it. Let's go back to my place. I need an ice-pack and my dignity."

Even beaten up, Agent Happy Face was still handsome and sunny.

Fucker.


	61. If only…

Agent Not so Happy Face gave Jas the directions, which in this town is not difficult to follow.

He lives in what used to be a store, converted into an apartment complex.

"It's a loft, I have the second floor. You can have one of the bedrooms, there's three and a big living room with pull-out sofa. You guys decided where you'll be sleeping...Um can you give me a moment? Be right back."

He walks inside and leaves us in front of his front door.

I can make up the voice of a woman.

Figures, we get to bunk with a fucking player.

"Maybe we should find somewhere else to stay-"

Davis suddenly opens the door.

"Come on in, welcome to my humble home."

I notice that he tried to clean up in a hurry.

"Sorry for the mess, it's laundry day and Roxie... well she's a bit pissed I didn't call her about this. I might need to call Teá."

I'm confused, but decide to let it go, it certainly isn't my business.

Jas is fidgeting with his duffel.

"Pick your room and I take the spare, it doesn't matter which."

He looks around and finally makes eye contact with me.

"Can we be in the same room?"

Ah...shit.

"Let's look at the bedroom then."

Agent Happy Face has a bewildered look...I bet he wasn't expecting that.

"Sure. I'm going to check on Roxie. Get comfortable, if you need anything let me know."

:::

The bed is king-size, which is very good news.

Jas sits on the bed and throws the duffel on the floor.

"What's your problem?"

"I-I don't know. It's fucking with my head seeing Alice...she is not going to forgive and forget. You'll get the girl and won't need me no more. And this fucker gets to have the life...two women under the same roof. Damn."

He shakes his head repeatedly.

Our conversation gets interrupted by loud voices.

"So now we have to welcome them into our home after he beat you up. You are bleeding! LET ME AT 'EM, I'll fucking show him! Come here, I'll kiss it better, after you kick them out."

"Roxie, baby, I can't do that. Swan he needs my help, I have to be undercover and having them here will help me get into character. This is nothing, it's just a scratch and beside makes me look hot, don't you think? And then Teá and you can be my nurses, taking care of me...Don't you want to nurse me back to health?"

Role playing?

Seriously?

With guests staying over?

This was just surreal.

This guy was living the life for sure.

:::

I was sitting on the sectional, channel surfing.

Jas was in one of his moods and was taking a shower.

Roxie was glaring at me every time she passed by me.

I was sure she would poison my food, so I was gonna decline anything made by her hands.

Agent Davis had been on the phone for a while, but at last he came out of his bedroom.

He had cleaned up and changed, looking refreshed.

Nothing could tarnish his good looks and bright disposition.

He took a seat on the other side of the sofa.

I was glad he was leaving space between us, it was too soon to be buddies.

"Swan has talked with the local authorities. It has been notified that strangers are living in a secluded house in the woods west of here. I'm almost a hundred percent sure it's the guys you saw today. Demetri and Alec are probably staking out the town, just as you are. But we don't think they will hold the fights over there. There isn't an abandon warehouse available for this kind of illicit activity in the vicinity of Forks. All we have plenty of: pouring rain, forest and the Reservation.

Do you know any detail of the venue? It would be beneficial to get a look at the site, that way we can set the perimeter in advance and take them down.

Anyway, are we now gonna have the 411?"

I was about to reply, when the door opened and in came the waitress, Teá.

Huh?

"Hey, Stranger. Oh, hi aren't you the guy from earlier today? What the fuck happened to your face? I heard you were fighting in the parking lot from Pammy but I refused to believe it. Did you do this to him? ROXIE!"

Roxie stroll in looking a bit menacing.

I was ready for a chick fight, but that's not what occurred next.

"Did our lover tell you we have "guests" staying with us? And one of them punched his face, I had to take care of it. I have a mind to punch his eyes shut for this, but I'm not allowed to touch this asshole, some secret mission orders from Swan.

How was your day? Good tips?

We need to get our hair done and maybe a mani-pedi too, but I don't have extra cash this month. It all went on that new equipment. I'm really gonna be pissed if I don't get reimbursed by the office. It sucks being legit for obvious reasons, but I sure as hell like getting paid for hacking."

They kept talking like they were sisters... it was weird.

No insults, hair pulling or slaps.

Agent Happy Face was looking at them adoringly.

It was then I realized the apartment was crowded with photographs of the coup- well can't say couple in this case, can I?

It was a threesome, a triad.

Agent Clapton Davis was no player, he had two women, at the same time, under the same roof.

Next, I will see the next installment in evolution, the tree tits woman and two fuck holes.

Oh, wait they already have three.

That is why women beat men every time.

In this particular situation, Agent Happy Face has six holes at his disposal.

No wonder he is chipper and satisfied.

In turn, this made me ponder if I could actually have this for myself.

Could I have Isabella and Jasper?

Could we coexist like these people do every day for the rest of our lives?

If only...


	62. Lucky indeed

Dinnertime was mostly quiet affair.

Jas kept checking his mobile.

I was sure he was hoping Midget would call him.

As for me, I decided to give Isabella some space until…tomorrow.

Agent Davis acted as if no visitors were spectators to his unorthodox relationships.

Roxie didn't let down on her sneering demeanor towards me.

Teá kept looking at everyone and asking if we needed something.

The poor girl was still in waitress mode.

:::

Jas and I turned in.

Each taking a side of the bed, not looking at each other.

We were avoiding the big elephant sitting between us.

"Jas?"

"Yeah?"

"If…would you accept living with two people as your lovers? Is that doable to you? Do you…you think Isabella would accept such an arrangement? Is that too much to ask from both of you?"

As if on cue, Roxie and Teá started vocalizing their pleasure.

"Oh yes yes yes! FUCK YES!"

"Ahhhhh oooohhhhh mmmm!"

Agent "Wandering Hands" was at it again.

"My Roxie, show me how much have you missed me today. Mmmm so ready my Teá, what a good girl."

I didn't want to be privy to their private activities, but it was inevitable.

Jas not answering made me think he was asleep, but then he turned and touched my arm.

"The only person that has been my tether to this world is you. If keeping you means sharing you with another…I will accept and adjust to that reality. If only… I was willing before, even if that decision has practically ruined my chances with Alice. I can't commit to this at this moment. I still await for her forgiveness, my last hope. Besides you would need to speak with Bella."

Right.

"Oh fuck baby so tight! Love you, both of you."

What would Isabella say to "yeah let's all live together, Jas, you, and I for the rest of our lives."

Agent Happy Face was lucky indeed.


	63. Our Thelma and Louise

"Edward?"

"Yes, Isabella."

"Um...are we okay?"

I let her sweat it out a bit, not saying a word.

"Edward? Did you hang up on me? HELLOOO! Fuck, I'm sorry...I know you wanted to, but we couldn't at the moment-"

I can hear Midget talking to her and I cringe as I hear her disdain.

"You hang up on him, Bella. He was acting like asshole looking for a booty call planning to fuck you against your father's fridge. That's just wrong."

Yeah, fuck you Midget.

No one asked your opinion.

Fix your shit first.

"Alice stay out of this. Still there?"

I cleared my throat.

"Yes, still here. I'm staying with Davis. Jas is still here with me, but he's not a happy camper. This Davis dude... well he's unconventional to say the least. I'm waiting for him to give the signal. We saw some Volturi here in town. You stay inside your house. You understand, Isabella?"

Now, it was she who was giving me the silent treatment.

"Promise me, Isabella."

"I promise to stay inside. Besides my dad would strap me to the bed, if he thinks it would keep me safe and away from you. Are we okay?"

She sounded unsure and conflicted.

I wanted to give her something, but didn't know what.

"I need to...talk about something. I want your take on this. If you don't approve or disregard the subject, I'll drop it. But for now stay home and do whatever it is you do with Midget."

"Wouldn't you like to know? We practice going down on each other, that's how I know how to work my tongue that special way-"

FUCK!

"You want me to behave? I'm about to run to your house, and fuck you where you stand...I love you."

"I love you, too. Call me later, Edward."

Edward "Pussy whipped" Cullen, that was my new nickname.

Em was right, Isabella had some how gotten under my skin and tamed somewhat the _It_ that lived within me.

Jas had accepted it and even embraced that side of me.

Isabella in her own special way had found herself ingrained inside my very soul.

"Hey Cullen! We are ready. I got some intel from the local police. I told them we are going to stake out the house, where the two strangers have been seen residing. It's in the woods, so we'll be covered. Only we can't be made, or this will over before it even started. Demetri and Alec are the ones you have identified. We need to make sure those are the only ones here. If we see more Volturi here in Forks, we have to alert Agent Swan, so he can deliver the info to the FBI liaison. So, are you set and ready to leave?"

There it was, Agent Happy Face giving me his signature smile.

I knew why he was so happy, and why I was so unhappy this morning.

I had to listen to his moaning and grunting all through the night, as he fucked Roxie and Teá to oblivion and complete satiation.

If I didn't have to keep him company I would definitely run towards Isabella's house, kick Midget out, and fuck her until my legs don't work anymore; or I pass out from overexertion.

"Jas! We need to leave, now. Jas?"

I went towards our temporary room and opened the door.

Jas wasn't sitting or sleeping on the bed.

I proceeded to look for him in the bathroom.

He was brushing his teeth, the only cloth on him, a towel slung down on his narrow hips.

Spitting up his mouth full, he looks at me through the mirror.

"What's with the hollering? I'm not deaf. I'll be with you shortly."

"Why are you cross with me? It is not my fault Midget can't get over it. If she loves you so much, she would forgive and forget, or better yet accept the real you. I already did my part. Her hostility is all hers. I told her all I thought was necessary. You fucked up and you are paying for it. Deal and move on. Now get dressed, Agent Happy Face is waiting."

I was getting tired of his moping and fucking mood swings over Midget.

"Let me relieve you..."

His words stopped me in my tracks, causing me to turn back.

He was kneeling at my feet, ready to take my cock inside his mouth as soon as it released from my jeans.

"Jas...you don't need to do this every time you feel like shit. Man, I love you. That's a fact. You are part of my life, the only friend I had when I needed one, and the lover when I didn't know what love was. But don't turn this into a castigation over your actions. I won't allow you to debase yourself over guilt. The bitch of a mother who broke you, deserves to rot in hell for what she's done to you... Fuck, I wish she would still be alive, so I could kill her slowly, make her beg for mercy and finding none. Please, get dressed we have things to do."

"I can't deal with the emptiness...It's gonna swallow me, Masen."

He stood naked, as the towel swiveled and fell to the ground.

I opened my arms and held him.

"Just one day at a time, Jas. I'm still here."

He tried to hold a sob, then tried to cover it with a snort.

"If you fight, it might be your last drawing breath. Remember our promise...I can't-"

I kissed him hard, trying to reassure him, and myself.

I would live through this.

His lips tasted salty.

It was his tears.

Our breathing was intermingling and we made eye contact.

It felt like the reaffirmation of that vow made long ago, between two damaged teenagers.

Curiously, the dread that was settling on my stomach was not for me, but for Jas.

What if he didn't make it?

Would I uphold our promise and cease to exist?

What about Isabella?

Was her love so strong to keep me tethered to this world?

Jas kissed me back, taking me within his embrace.

It was unequal, like the balance between us had shifted.

I think we both knew the life we had lived until this point was coming to an end.

I cradled his face, trying to find a way to stop this inevitable conclusion.

We were fighting against the tide, like a salmon ready to be eaten by the hungry bear waiting at the other end of the stream.

"Don't give up...just yet."

As the words left me, I feared it was for not.

:::

Agent Davis drove us into the woods, through a dirt road.

It seemed the only traffic it had gotten had been very recently.

We had to leave the car behind, and continue on foot.

What we found was a mansion, hidden behind the massive foliage.

Parked at the driveway was a black Mercedes, one of Aro's cars I was sure.

"It has to be them. Around these parts no one drives an expensive luxury car. This house must be Aro Volturi's property, one of many around the state. We need to keep undercover. We'll probably stay as long as we can to make visual confirmation."

:::

Three fucking hours later, and finally Alec decided to come out of the house, and in turn give us the confirmation we needed.

"Swan. We have Alec Volturi, sending you the photo now...Yes, sir. We'll be leaving now."

But nothing could have prepared us for what happened next.

Alice came out of the door with Isabella.

They got inside the Mercedes.

From here we could hear their laughter.

Jas gasped and clenched his hands into fists, ready to sprint to their rescue.

Davis scrambled to get his phone back, that had slipped from his hands at the sight.

I was growling and seething were I stood.

I told her to stay inside her home.

We were going to handle this.

Demetri came outside without a shirt and opened pants.

Yes, he was going to die.

I didn't give a fuck if it was Emmett's right to end him.

Alec pulled the top down, it was fucking convertible and he was getting ready to entertain his female guests.

"Demetri get a damn shirt on, so we can take this girls for a ride."

As he said ride, the message between the lines was loud and clear.

Over my dead body were any of those fuckers riding my Isabella.

Jas and Davis took hold of my arms as I started to struggle, trying to escape their hold on me.

The _It_ wasn't satisfied and wanted blood.

I wanted to punish Isabella and break some necks while at it.

She will learn to follow instructions once I was through with her.

"Swan, I have bad news...Your daughter...she's with them."

"WHAT?"

Yeah, you pissed off your daddy.

What do you say little girl?

"I'm sorry sir, but it seems Bella and her friend decided to do some recon of their own..."

Swan was screaming his head off and Davis was cringing and pulling the phone way from his ear.

"Why would they do that?"

"I don't know Jas. They are crazy bitches with a death wish or maybe they want to be Thelma and Louise, drive off from the fucking cliff after sunset...Makes them perfect for us."

He chuckled.

"Yeah...perfect for us."

I didn't chuckle back.


	64. Midget would be a nice punching bag

"What the fuck do we do now? They are with them...Shit. Masen?"

There was nothing that could call the It now.

Except to let go on those two smug fuckers.

And right now Midget would be a nice punching bag.

"Take deep breaths...You can't pass out, Masen. I'll have to call Carl-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! Damn it all to hell, Jas. Those two have them, we have to keep following wherever they go. Davis don't fucking lose them. I won't be sorry to rearrange your pretty smiling face, and get a thrashing by your Roxie."

Agent Happy Face chortled back.

"My Roxie is a spitfire. She was enraged that you bloodied me up, kept saying she was going to poison you for it. Teá, my angel controlled her. Doesn't mean she was too happy either, it was awesome getting pampered though. I might rile you up, so I can get treated by my two nurses back home."

And then he winked at me.

Fucking wandering hands and happy faces.

"How did that happened?"

Jas looked a bit uneasy.

"You mean how we role play? Well, they got dressed in their costumes-"

"Fuck man! I mean how did you meet them? How did you get so lucky to have two women at your beck and call?"

My eyes wandered back to the car in front, to where Isabella was laughing it up with my enemies.

I wasn't going to let her out of my sight again.

Now I understood why women should be pregnant and barefoot.

"Um...well I arrested Roxie. She's a computer genius and she was using it for the wrong side. Her roommate was Teá. There was another girl, her name was Jay. She was foreign and hot as hell. We had a night together and it was fucking awesome. Too bad she had to go back to Norway...maybe I would have three girls all to myself-"

THREE WOMEN?

One night?

Who was this guy?

"Do you use drugs or enhancements? How can you keep up?"

Jas was looking at Agent Happy Face with incredulity.

"Mr. Whitlock I would have know that I'm capable of satisfying my Roxie and Teá all own my own. How about you? Do you need an extra incentive to get it up?"

I had to hold Jas back, as he was getting ready to attack Agent Cocky Ass.

"If you think we are hiding behind women. You are wrong. What I do with my cock is no business of yours. What you said here was voluntary. As for Jas, he has no problems getting it up with a woman or a man. Hope that clears that up for you."

Jas glared towards me.

I shrugged back.

I had to qualms about my sexuality, neither should he.

Thankfully, the Mercedes stopped and parked right on the shoulder of the road.

"I know where they are going. This is inside the Reservation territory. They are taking them to the cliffs. The local kids cliff dive, its pretty dangerous if you don't know what you are doing."

Davis looked for a spot to park.

I was itching to get out.

"We can't be seen. Try to control yourselves."

"Is that try not to get handsy and forget our plan? Or simply show ourselves and claim our women? Go fuck yourself, Davis!"

"Shh...Keep your voice down, Cullen. Let's go through that side, that way we will be able to see them, but they won't see us."

Unfortunately, we had a great view of Demetri getting his shirt off again, while Midget admired his many tattoos.

Alec was sitting by Isabella on a rock.

"Hey Whitlock, maybe you should consider getting ink. I have some, it gets my Teá hot and bothered as uses her tongue-"

"Would you shut up about your intimate activities with your little harem?"

"Jealous, Cullen?"

I didn't dignify that with an answer, which in itself was one.

On the other side, Isabella was acting shy and Alec was enjoying getting her meek smiles.

Those smiles were mine.

She was all mine.

He touched her cheek and I saw her gasp.

In her eyes, I saw apprehension.

She was afraid of this man.

I was about to walk towards her, when Jas' hand held me back.

"Not yet. They are in danger. We can't act irrationally, Masen."

"I love her, Jas."

"I know..."

"Maybe...we can have it all."

"Maybe."

A loud splash alerted us to the presence of other people.

We could hear the hollering from a group half-naked boys.

One after the other, started to dive off the nearest cliff.

"Shit, the Res boys are here. We have to move further back. I'll call the Chief and make up something to make him come here."

Davis started to talk in hushed tones, with I assumed was the Police Chief of Forks.

This was getting out of hand fast.

To make matters worse, one of the boys left the rowdy pack.

He seemed familiar and certainly not a boy, but a grown man.

He walked in the direction of Isabella.

"Bella?"

My Isabella recognized his voice and turned towards him.

"Jacob?"

Alec looked annoyed at the presence of the half-naked man.

I'm befuddled.

"B what are you doing here? I would have come to see you. I've missed you so much."

Fucking Jacob proceeded to hug my Isabella, his hands all over her.

"I've missed you too, Jake."

Missed?

How did she know asshole Jacob?

Jas perceived the need to take precautionary measures and stood in front of me.

"Edward...You need to calm down. You can't go over there and pummel Jake to the ground. The police are coming and we have to follow the girls."

He doesn't call me Edward.

I looked into his eyes and nodded.

This just got better and better.

Now I had to contend with not only Alec and Demetri, but Jacob as well.

I regretted that last time I didn't make him bleed enough.


	65. Damn that dog was going to be put down

"Keep breathing. Fuck, I'm gonna call Carl. I need him and Em to get here as soon as possible. Maybe even Riley. Shit. Agent Davis?"

Deep breathing couldn't stop my need to make _someone_ bleed.

He touched her.

She let him.

He missed her.

She missed him.

Who was Jacob in Isabella's life?

"Jake...this Alice and these guys we just met back at the diner. They wanted to have some fun..."

Midget decided to take it from there, but her words were not my concern.

It was my Isabella, putting herself in harm's way for what?

Why?

"Does your father know you are here? He's not gonna be pleased...Remember when he found us in my truck? Man, I thought it was my last night alive, but totally worth it...second base."

Isabella's eyes got wide and her skin turned pink all over.

"Jake...please. That was a long time ago. Besides I-I have...well its been a long time and we are no longer those lust filled teenagers."

She looked flustered, and I think for a moment she was going to say she had a boyfriend.

But then she didn't say it, and it hurt in return.

SAY. IT.

You are mine.

"Come on, Jake that was a million years ago, and while I'll admit stories of your cock amused me back then...Bella has moved on to bigger and better...things.

In this moment I would have kissed Midget, and strangle her at the same time.

Knowing Isabella had given her body to another before me was a reality, but seeing whom that had been...well it was making me unhinged.

Asshole Jacob had touched my Isabella.

Might have been her first.

It shouldn't bother me, but it fucking did.

I felt a need to wipe his memory clean off those memories or kill him.

Which one was easier to get done?

Kill him.

"What the fuck are you doing? STAY RIGHT HERE!"

I didn't give a fuck what Jas demanding.

Agent Happy Face stood in my way.

"Hey, Cullen...I don't know what's going through that crazy head, but you need to stand-down. Just wait until the cops break this up and then we can follow Bella and Alice, OK?"

I was gritting my teeth so hard, it would be no surprise if I chipped one.

"Have any of your women disobeyed you? Gone behind your back and gotten themselves in danger? Have you seen her hugging a past lover and she doesn't mention you? HAVE YOU? GET. OUT. OF. MY. WAY. DAVIS. I'm not fucking around."

Agent Davis rolled his eyes in a very dramatic way.

"Would you chill? That's Jacob, old news. Don't get a fucking aneurysm over that jerkwad, who broke Bella's heart. He was her best friend, and then things progressed...until he fucked up and she dumped his ass. The end. You see there's no reason for you to break cover and ruin our stake out over this. As for my Roxie and Teá...I kind of got in the way of Roxie and Jay, so I made sure we had ground rules once we established our relationship. That way we don't risk fucking up what is the perfect partnership I've ever had. You need to have roadways of communication in order for a relationship to work. Talk things out with Bella."

He was talking slowly, as that would in turn calm me down.

It was my turn to roll my eyes at him.

Finally, a siren could be heard and the half-naked boys started to scatter.

"Fuck! I was so ready to show off my diving skills. Hey Alec! We need to leave, before the cops get here. Come Alicia we can go back to the house and finish this stimulating conversation."

"Isabella?"

Alec was waiting for a response and the return of my Isabella's attention.

She was still close to Jacob, too close to his reach.

He embraced her again and smelled her hair.

"Come see me. I'm staying with dad. It's good to see you, B."

He ruffled her hair and ran towards the woods, in the direction his friends had gone.

Damn that dog was going to be put down.

"Stay put, Cullen. I'm tempted to handcuff you to the tree and let Whitlock here torture you... maybe that would get you more riled up-"

"Try that with my brother, Dr. Carlisle Cullen. He's into that handcuff shit. Jas...if he doesn't stop touching her..."

"I know. Just endure it."

He was in pain, seeing Alice unreservedly flirt with that skinhead.

If she only knew what that fucker liked to do for fun, she would be running towards the cliffs and diving off.

:::

They got back in the car.

Isabella was sitting in front, beside Alec.

In the back, Demetri was slobbering all over Midget's neck.

Just as they were pulling away, the police cruiser arrived at the scene.

Demetri turned on his seat and gave the cop the middle finger, as Alec floored the car.

"Shit! Get moving, Davis. We can't lose their trail."

"Sorry Officer. I'll contact your Sheriff later."

With that we were speeding down the road, trying to catch up with the black Mercedes.

"Agent Swan...Sir, we are still following them. The license plate? Washington plates. No, sir. She hasn't been harm...Mr. Cullen has behaved, under the circumstances. No, sir. Your daughter and Alice Brandon seemed to have met them at the diner. Yes, sir. I'll keep you posted of any developments."

Swan sounded extremely pissed.

Abruptly, the car stopped and my Isabella nose-dived to the ground as she expelled the contents of her stomach.

Midget got out and held her hair back, while rubbing her back.

Demetri slammed the door and looked disgusted.

"Fuck, the bitch isn't even drunk and she's puking her guts out. Too bad you won't be getting sucked like I did, Alec. You should have pushed her on her knees. Alicat is a goddess, even better than Rose and I taught that bitch how to fucking swallow."

So it was confirmed...Alice had sucked that psychopath's cock.

Jas stiffen beside me, looking so pale I was sure he was the one in peril of passing the fuck out.

His breathing got labored, as he tried to breathe.

His hand found mine, gripping so tightly my hand lost its color.

Alec got out of the car and glared at Demetri.

"Shut up, Demetri. No need to be so crass. There are ladies present."

Demetri sneered back and held his dick, just to taunt Alec.

Alec moved to stand beside my Isabella, as she stood on wobbly legs with help from Midget.

"I think we should get you back to your car. We can go out another time. Demetri get in the front, now."

I felt, more than heard Jas' sigh of relief.

We both could be thankful, that now they were sitting together and were returning to the diner.

Agent Davis immediately called Swan with the latest update.

:::

We parked right in front of Agent Swan's modest home.

At last, Midget's POS car came down the road and parked in the driveway.

This time no one could stop as I practically ran to her door.

"Shit! You scared me, Edward. I'm not feeling well-"

"WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DISOBEY ME? It was simple. Stay in the fucking house! I SAW YOU Isabella! You put yourself in danger and then you hugged that Jacob? That dog is dead-"

"I don't need your shit right now! I'm sick. I want to lying down in my bed and sleep until next week. I'm not alert enough to handle your possessive shit right this minute. We went to eat breakfast at the diner. Alec and Demetri happened to be there...and they got interested. We took a chance...I'm sorry."

With that, Isabella puked all over my shirt.

"Oh Bella! See what you did! How she still wants to be with you...I don't understand. We were trying to help you. We got some information, but I can't tell you now. I have to help Bella and clean her up. Davis, you are going to fall in love with me!"

It looked like Midget was doing the pee-pee dance instead of a victory dance.

Jas had walked closer, but his expression showed no emotion.

"Hey Jas, you looked winded. Want something to drink? Help yourself. Come on in boys."

Agent Happy Face had just finished the latest call.

"Well Swan has simmered down now that his daughter is back home... What the fuck happened to you Cullen?"

Then he proceeded to guffaw in my face.

"Oh my...I can't stop...You need to be hosed down, man. You stink! Hahaha."

And this is what you have turned me into Isabella, the source of other men's jokes.

Jas gave me a little smirk, the only sign of life he had given.

"Don't you mention this to Em, or I will never live this down. Not one word, Jas."

"I'll get the hose."

As he walked away I heard his snicker.

All I can say, fuck my life.


	66. The end justifies the means

"Are you still feeling sick?"

Isabella responded with a moan.

"I-I need to know that nothing happened...Who is Jacob in your life, Isabella?"

I just needed her to reassure me that Jacob was nothing.

Also that Demetri nor Alec touched a hair in her head.

"Nothing happened. Alice took care of that...She loves me like a sister and would do anything for me...Jacob...Well, he is part of my past. If you must know he was my first everything...My dad loves him, since he's best friends with Jacob's dad. Things didn't end well between us. Its part of the reason I left Forks and decided to move with Alice. Meeting you...giving myself to you was a risk I swore I wouldn't take. It was hard getting my heartbroken by my best friend and only boyfriend. Now, let me sleep Edward. I'm so tired..."

She turned and immediately dozed off.

I went through her words in my mind... what stood out was _he_ was her first everything.

Her first kiss.

Her first love.

Her first fuck.

I could fucking picture it.

I wanted to wipe out the pictures running through my head.

Jacob braced on top of my Isabella, thrusting and grunting, sweating and pounding.

I end up feeling nauseated, in great need of expelling my guts out or getting knocked out.

:::

Midget was sitting on the living room pretending to watch the news.

"Hey Midget, how's life been treating you lately?"

I was being an asshole, but that's what she brought out in me.

"Seriously? Well, let me give you the cliff notes version. I found the man of my dreams in the most unlikely place; had fuckawesome sex; then it all went to shit when I found him in bed with my naked best friend and her fuckhot boyfriend. Now he's all emo and shit and I'm the evil witch 'cause I kind of sucked off that badass motherfucker. All caught up on the headlines now, Edward? Oh, please don't pester Bella over Jacob...He is sore subject for her. It's been over for a while and she moved on. It's old news that don't need to be brought to the present. The present being fucked over as it is. You hungry? I'm starving, but since I don't cook, I'll order pizza for everyone."

She stood and went to the handset in the kitchen.

I could hear her speak and order the pizza.

"Did you listen to that? I'm a fucking emo and she is Maleficent. I fucking swear I'm getting sick of her bullshit. If only we could just skip this town and leave all this behind us...Carl is not too happy. He wants me to take you to get checked out. Are you experiencing any blurry vision or nausea? He is really worried, but can't take off yet. Em is waiting for him, you know him itching for a fight. If he only knew we saw his nemesis and that you almost-"

"Let's just go. I don't wanna stay here...Swan will be back and he won't be pleased to see us here. We must keep a low profile and not be spotted by those fuckers, much less in the company of Isabella and Midget. We'll talk later, and you can tell me how you really feel. Where's Davis?"

Jas rolled his eyes and looked towards the front window.

"He is talking with his women. Smug bastard has them eating out of the palm of his hand. How did he get so fucking lucky? I mean he is handsome...and an FBI agent. Damn. That must be it. Or maybe he's hung and knows how to use it. Anyway, let's leave then."

Jas walked in Midget's direction, I'm guessing to tell her we were leaving.

Finally, Davis was coming into the house with a fucking grin on his face.

"WHAT? You are leaving? But I ordered the food, so you must stay and fucking eat it, Jasper! Oh, you think so..."

Davis stood beside me, both of us trying to make out the rest of the conversation.

"He must be pissed...I don't think any guy would be thanking his girlfriend for fellating another man. She did get info from this Demetri. They are staying here and something big is happening this weekend. It seems the Volturi found a field, where the fighting will take place. I'm thinking it will be on that property. I asked for the deed and the perimeter it covers. If I'm right then we can cover the area and have a better idea of the setting, this way when the showdown starts we'll have it covered from all angles and no one will be able to elude us. Is Bella okay?"

He looked down at my still wet clothes and snickered.

"She's sleeping. I don't know what happened to her, she said she was tired and fell asleep."

Davis locked his eyes with mine.

"There's more isn't there? Did she tell you anything else?"

I averted my eyes, trying to hide the growing unrest inside me.

"Nothing that concerns your case, Agent Davis."

He nodded, but his eyes told me he knew more than he let on.

"You didn't fuck my Isabella?"

With widen eyes, Davis took a step back.

"Are you crazy, Cullen? No, I have no intimate relationship with Isabella Swan. She is off-limits to anyone who doesn't want to have his balls blown off. I'm still waiting for Swan to start target practice on your ass. She is his little girl and he would do just about anything for her. Remember, I have my Roxie and Teá."

He winked.

"If that is true. Why isn't Jacob dead then?"

It was too late to take it back.

He was just waiting for my mouth to go off.

"Trying to fish for information on Black? Jacob Black is the son of Billy Black, Swan's best friend. He was Bella's best friend was upon a time. Things progressed and they became an item, looking very much in love. That was until Jacob fucked up and cheated on Bella with some Res girl. He tried everything to gain her forgiveness, but Bella wouldn't have it. She saw no more future here and moved with Alice to Port Angeles, to a new life and a job in a book store. The end...or is it?"

I growled and stormed off towards the kitchen to get Jas.

:::

I walked into a standoff.

Jas with his arms crossed glaring at Midget.

Midget standing with her hands on her hips.

"Sorry to interrupt, but we need to leave. Jas?"

Jas kept his gaze locked on Midget.

"Just wait until the pizza gets here and then you can leave."

"Alice? Can you order pizza? I'm so hungry and I don't want to cook at the moment...Where is Ed-"

Isabella had come down and looked disheveled, but so fuckable.

"Nuh-uh, don't fucking think it Edward. I wanna eat and go back to bed."

I shut her up by biting her lower lip.

"Missed me, baby?"

Her eyes brighten a bit and I saw the ghost of smile on her lips.

"Always. What is going on here?"

Midget huffed exasperated with Jas.

"He is bitching about what I did. I'm a free agent, so I don't get his ruffled feathers. What I got out of it is valuable in the end. So the end justifies the means, so says Machiavelli. Bella, are you feeling better? You scared me with your gastric pyrotechnics which freed us of those creeps, for that I have to thank you. Who knows what I would've been obligated to do-"

"Y-You don't care about us anymore? Is that it for us, Alice?"

Jas was looking closer to a breakdown, and I knew I had to protect him from Midget's caustic words.

"You need to get something straight Jasper Whitlock, I'm an independent woman and I do with my body as I please. What happened today has no effect on my self-worth, so don't look so dejected and offended for me. I made the decision, no one shoved a dick down my throat."

Jas sneered and simply exploded and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

"Yeah, tell that to the fuckers who did that to us, or to my bitch of a mother who didn't take no for an answer. I've always had to accept and give. I know what's like to be subjected to "dick down my throat" as you eloquently expressed. By age fifteen I knew how to give head like a pro, but it wasn't by choice. By now I don't have a gag reflex, therefore I can deep-throat Edward until he comes and I swallow it all. But then I can eat you too as well, courtesy of my mother. I think I'm not hungry anymore and I would like to leave."

I rubbed my face, knowing this would need my intervention later tonight.

He had taken his pound of flesh, it was his revenge.

To rub it in her face, his sordid past, his sexual skills at the hands of his tormentors, to declare his exploits with yours truly.

He sauntered out of the room, slamming the door on his way out.

I'm about to rip my hair out, all because Midget couldn't keep her mouth shut.

"I-I'm sorry...I didn't mean to hurt him..."

She was crying now and Bella moved to hold her in her arms.

"Isabella...I'll call you later."

Her eyes were watering and I simply wanted to bolt from the room.

I had enough to deal with Jas and his meltdown.

Davis had gotten the car ready and was waiting by the curb.

I didn't see Jas sitting inside the car and suddenly feared he had left on foot.

Out of nowhere I'm embraced from behind.

I felt his hot breath on my neck, then the brush of his lips on my earlobe.

"I feel so wretched in her eyes...like dying is best. It is truly over. What I fear now the most is losing you to your _Isabella_. If you want me to I'll be the substitute and gladly take it... if it's the end of me, you'll be free from my burden. It isn't fair for you to carry this weight any longer, therefore I'm freeing you of your oath. I want you to be happy...and that happiness is tied to her. I can't be selfish and intent to keep you..."

I was shivering, but it wasn't from the cold.

I tried to move, but he wouldn't let me.

"Don't fight this. It is just, it is what it has to be."

The hole inside me, the same one within him was winning, gaining strength.

"I love you, Jas. Nothing can change that...I still haven't talked with Isabella. Don't give up on us. Just stop this bullshit talk, or I'll have to beat it out of you. You won't hit me on the head, so I'll take advantage and set you straight. Now, let's go before Swan sees us in his front yard."

He took my earlobe with his teeth and pulled.

"Let me love you...I need you, so fucking much it burns. This ache inside my chest, it won't go away. Only you can appease it. Please..."

I felt his need, hard and ready at my back.

My body started to react accordingly.

My eyes closed and it was like we were back in the home.

Jas and I, the best of friends, comrades in arms, learning to cope in a world that swallowed the weak and allowed the wicked to conquer.

He had been my world, and I had been his.

No one could against both of us, our strength had derived from our connection.

A connection that still prevailed, even with Midget and Isabella in our lives.

Davis honked the horn, beckoning us to get inside the car.

"Yes."

No more words were necessary.

His hold got tighter for a few seconds, then he let go.

As he moved, I felt the graze of his hand as he walked by me.

I almost wished he would've taken my hand within his grasp.

I was in daze between the past and the present, not really knowing where I stood.

I was trapped in my sixteen-year-old self, I was Masen.

And Masen said yes to Jas.

Always.


	67. It was confession time

Like a tornado had hit, I was swept into this urge to be loved by him.

I truly felt like we were hiding in that third floor bathroom at 3AM, back at that dreadful home; trying to be quiet but failing.

His hands would tease me, and I would try to hold back my tortured moans.

Davis kept his eyes on the road, knowing that what was happening wasn't for anyone but us.

At that moment I grew to respect Agent Happy Face.

After all he knew what was like to be judged by loving "not the right way" and right now I appreciated the space he was giving us, even if we should have been more controlled.

I'm tempted to give him an excuse, but Jas took the words into his own mouth when he plunged his tongue.

This kind of passionate give and take had been missing from us.

Davis coughed and brought our attention to the here and now.

"We are home. Well my home... you know what I mean..."

It is funny to see him stutter and try to look elsewhere.

"Don't sweat it man. We had to hear your activities all night and now we are paying you back. No harm done."

Jas looked smug in his direction and got out of the car without looking back.

He knew I would follow him, and that I did.

What Davis did next or what he said to his harem I didn't fucking know or cared.

:::

Inside that room, Jas was waiting.

Only now he looked a bit lost and apprehensive.

His eyes looked into mine, searching for I was sure the regret, the goodbye, like this was the end of us.

"I miss your hair...I loved taking hold of it as you fucked me. But I have to say you are a goddamn handsome motherfucker regardless of the state of your hair."

So...it was confession time.

"I miss your blonde hair...like when we were just kids. I guess I miss the time when it was only us against the world, but then I remember how it was and I think I might be suffering from a mental disease. How can I wish that upon us? We were barely surviving and it was no life at all...Yet, it was the time we met and we helped each other.

Then fighting became our escape, and now I won't even have that...What the fuck am I gonna do, Jas? Isabella...she doesn't know what lives within me. I can't hurt her, it can never touch her..."

He started to unbutton his jeans.

I followed with taking my shirt from my back, stretching my arms as I threw it on the floor.

"Are you feeling any symptoms that I should tell Carl?"

I walked and stood right in front of him, so close I could feel his breath on my face.

"Don't be a pussy and let's fuck. It is what you wanted and I'm right here."

His eyes looked too bright, and I knew he was holding back the tears.

"It will pass, like everything else. I'm here for you, like we have been for each other these last ten years. If something will survive it will be us and our clan. We stick together."

I was trying to reassure him, only it wasn't only for him.

If Isabella left me, I knew I would need him and the rest of my brothers.

Jas brushed his lips against mine, and took a deep breath.

"I don't want to fuck."

I tilted my head and looked at him befuddled at his words.

In a whisper Jas gave me his reply, "I want to love you. I-I want to make love with you."

Well, shit.

His hands had touched my chest and I had been so caught up that hadn't noticed them.

"You have always put a wall, a divisory line. You are a man and you take. Now I'm asking you to let these boundaries down for me and just love me. 'Cause you know what Masen, you have loved me practically half your life, and so have I. No one can take that away. It is. And one of the reasons Isabella is perfect for you... She understands this... Won't stand in the way or try to cover it up. She knows what's right here. No reason to hide it."

He touched my face, clearing a mischievous tear.

"No hiding behind our anger. This is real. Tomorrow might be different, but now there's you and me."

I crashed my lips to his, taking what was mine.

It felt like we were those fumbling teenagers, hiding in the shadows of a dirty communal bathroom inside a stall.

His hands decided to unclasp my jeans and shoved them down.

I had nothing else on and Jas looked a bit too pleased.

"A bit eager for some action, eh Masen?"

My mouth had traveled down his neck, probably leaving marks of my trail.

He took my cock in his hands, only it felt different.

He was caressing an old friend.

We had learned from each other, and somehow it felt like a reunion.

"Do you remember that night when we escaped and I tried to go down on you? I was too eager and gagged. You laughed and pushed me away, always the smug fucker who had already mastered taking me into your mouth. I was humiliated for five-seconds...You knew even then what to say to make it easier on my bruised ego. And practice we did..."

We kissed, his hands holding my shoulders.

Mine took purchase in his hair, holding his face closer.

Once breathless we separated a bit, his stare was intense.

"Even if this is the last time...I will never regret it. I owe you my life...without you I would've never survived. I know you think I look for approval by means of sexual favors...but never with you. What we did together was never tainted by the vestiges of my past, Masen."

I looked away, knowing those words had hurt him.

"I know. I'm an asshole."

He smirked in return.

"Yeah, but right now you're my asshole."

Our touches were no longer frenzied.

It was different from our last time, when fucking was the order of the day.

It had been like a dare that I could finally stand and fuck at the same time.

But now...it was about our connection.

Naked and unashamed, we rested on our sides looking into each other's eyes, our arms holding us closer.

I decided it was my turn to give.

Turning so I was lying on my back, I held Jas to my chest.

He's surprised at my move, but I knew he's pleased.

"Love me, Jas."

Like virgins, he took his time kissing and touching.

It was like he was almost afraid I would change my mind and stop him.

This was what he needed, and I would give him this moment.

Once inside me, he was bit overwhelmed and took a bite on my shoulder.

"Fuck...I-I can't hold on...its too much...Masen."

I kissed him back, there was no need for words.

Our souls were the ones talking, they knew better than our conscious selves

"Just love me."

I grabbed his hair harder, pushing him to the brink.

He bucked and pushed harder.

"Ah, fuck. That's it. Shit, Jas."

He was losing control of his movements.

It was then I felt his tears falling on my face and chest.

"I-I love you, Masen."

His thrusts gained momentum until he stilled and had his release.

I whimpered and moaned, knowing I had not come yet.

He dropped to the side, panting.

It felt wrong, as if I had held back.

"I'm sorry..."

"You didn't come..."

Next, I felt his tongue swirling down my torso until it enveloped my engorged cock.

"Can't have that..."

His mouth descended again and again, taking more each time.

His hand decided to help and fondle my balls, and now I was the one out of breath and ready to explode.

My moans got louder, now us being the ones giving an auditory concert to the other inhabitants of Davis' apartment.

"Give it to me, Masen"

Just a bit of scraping of his teeth, and I was done.

Without much energy, Jas fell back into bed.

"I love you, Masen. No matter what comes next. I will stay with you until...the end."

It was a good thing I was lying on the bed, since I was feeling out of sorts, like in a stupor with black spots clouding my vision and a beeping noise inside my head.

If Jas said anything else it faded into nothingness as I lost consciousness.


	68. Closing time

Light was filtering and bothering my eyes.

"Good, you are finally awake. I want you to tell exactly what happened, Edward. I might get you an CT scan appointment at the hospital...You scared Jasper to death, he called me sobbing and thinking you were going to die. You didn't respond to stimuli. Once I got here and I was able to calm him. So-"

I crossed my arms to block the light.

"Light sensitivity? Anything else? Pounding headache? Nausea?"

I grunted in response.

"What? Fucking tell me! I need to know what's precisely happening with you, so I can fucking help you!"

I moved my arms and looked towards the direction of his voice.

Carl looked haggard and pissed off, something that wasn't far off from his natural state...only he was extremely worried about me...again.

"I saw dark spots and then I passed out."

"That means you were not receiving enough blood flow to your brain... We need to take you to the hospital, Edward. It would be better to get a MRI scan, but the local hospital doesn't have one. I think we should go back to Seattle-"

"I'm not leaving Forks. Beside I'm sure it was just not staying put... I have to stay in bed, take my pills and all will be all right. I haven't rested properly since I've arrived to this nowhere town."

Carl glared and huffed.

"You think I don't know that you were fucking? Having brain fucking surgery hasn't stopped you, maybe the fear of death will. No more for now. I think the stress is too much for your body to handle right now. And no, not even getting sucked off. At the very least wait until we get a current image of your fucked-up brain."

His intense stare demanded compliance.

"Fine. We can go to the hospital and get the scan. Happy? How did you know?"

It was Carl's turn to chuckle.

"You were naked and stank of sex. Jasper was a blubbering mess, practically confessing he had killed you. You really didn't respond to any normal stimulus, until I checked your reflexes. It was like you had fallen into a coma. It's a fucking miracle I didn't call an ambulance, it was your snores that stopped me."

Smug bastard.

"I don't snore. Isabella hasn't complained."

It was my turn to act like a spoiled brat, crossing my arms and pouting.

"Really? Well, maybe not to your face... By the way, how's Bella?"

Isabella... my Isabella.

I dropped my act and sat up.

"I think you need to see her. She wasn't feeling well yesterday. She got sick and later she just wanted to sleep. Did Jas tell you what those two did? I wanted to punish her so fucking bad...but then she ruined it by getting sick."

Carl's face looked a pit pensive, making tense.

"You think it might be something serious? Maybe we should go over there, I need to make sure she's all right first-"

"We are going to the hospital. I'm sure she's fine, it probably was indigestion. She must have been under a lot of stress being in the company of two Volturi members. It did help in the end, didn't it? It freed them. So, I'd say it was a win-win in that situation."

His words didn't appease my uneasiness.

:::

"It is my professional opinion that Mr. Cullen should be admitted. He is at risk of suffering a stroke, you know this Dr. Cullen. He needs to take his medications at the correct times, and to rest. No stress and constant monitoring of his vital signs. If he experiences any symptoms, like the ones he's clearly had need to be taken seriously. It could be the difference from being alive to becoming a vegetable or death. Therefore, I won't consent to his release. If you condone it, it's under your responsibility Dr. Cullen."

The pompous doctor left us in a private room Carl had gotten for me.

"Edward... I think you should go back to Seattle. I get you a room, and even Esme can be your private nurse. You can taunt her all you want. Please...I-I can't bury you too... I've tried to be there for you, and you know I love you. But when is it going to be enough? You have gotten a second chance, don't fucking waste it. You found the girl, and for some reason she loves you back. She accepts you, with all your faults. It is time you think for yourself, and do what's right. As for Aro, I'll take care of it. We can make it without you, with the help of Swan and Davis, we'll end the Volturi."

"And then you'll be able to stop worrying about me, settle and marry Nurse "Fuck-Hot" Esme, and have those 2.5 kids. It would suit you just fine, Carl. I want you to be happy."

He looked perplexed, but not completely assured with my words.

"Does this mean you consent to going back to Seattle?"

I let his question stand between us for a few seconds unanswered.

"No. I will not backdown. I'm the leader of Fight Club, hence I won't leave the Cullen Clan headless. Aro Volturi expects me there. As for not fighting...Carl it will be my last fight. After this Fight Club is no more... at least for me. I need this last fight, without it I will always wonder. If I die, there's nothing to stop it. I can live with that. From here until then, I will enjoy every moment. Nothing is certain in life, only that one day you'll die. I won't run from it, it's pointless."

Carl remained quiet.

I was grateful that Jas hadn't heard me.

"Not even the possibility of a child would deter you from this direct path of self-destruction?"

What?

"Think about it, Edward. What if Isabella was carrying your child, would you force her to bring that child alone? Is that how you prove your love? Don't fucking do it for me, do it for her. I'm not going to use Jas... Clearly his begging hasn't worked. I'm tired... I feel like I've lived for too long in this diseased, lackluster world destined for annihilation. You are right. I should just ask Esme to marry me, have some kids and hope for the best. You should do the same."

Carl left me in a state of stillness.

His words were jumbled inside my mind, going round and round.

Nothing made sense.

"Masen? What did you say to Carl? He said he's going back to Seattle. He needs to buy a ring. Is he going to propose to Esme?"

I closed my tired eyes, and felt what Carl had meant.

I felt old, battered and splintered into pieces.

He was trying to get me to question my motives.

Was it really about taking a stand for my brothers?

Or was it a selfish drive to auto-inflict pain?

Suddenly, I felt like Jas wasn't the only one who wanted to die.

My way was slowly gaining on me.

It took years, but now it was almost closing time.

Hey Reaper, won't you give me a bit more time?

What about Isabella... a baby.

It was just too much for me to handle.

"Yeah, he's finally taking the plunge. I'm happy for him."

He sat beside me and took my hand.

"I know it wasn't good news... I'll be here."

Our moment was interrupted by Agent Davis.

Wait, Blonde Agent Davis.

"What's up, Blondie?"

"You like you were run-over... didn't know boys could be that rough. Anyway, my darling Teá thought it would be a good idea to change my look to be undercover. It was a great idea..."

He got all Agent Happy Face on us.

I snapped my fingers on that fucking sunshine face.

"Sorry. Um... but I still need to train a bit. I need to look like I'm an habitual player in your club. Will the other guys rat me out?"

I groaned, he was just too pumped up.

It was that Teá's tongue fault.

"Did you forget the rules already, man? Want me to pummel you again, even in my current state?"

He looked a bit abashed.

"We live by the rules. No one talks about Fight Club."

"Good, padawan. Soon you'll be set to join the Dark Side."

And then he proceeded to fist bump.

Em will love this guy.


	69. Carl, we have a problem

"So, I was wondering if you guys like zombie movies?"

Jas was looking out the window, his eyes gazed over.

It was clear he wasn't paying attention to Agent Fucking Blonde Davis.

"Sure... I've watched some episodes of that new series. The walkers sneaking up on you, and then you're fucked. It's a good thing you have a gun, eh Davis?"

"Yeah, your fighting skills wouldn't be of much help in that scenario, if you don't have some type of weapon to bash their brains. I have a question...where do you think is the best place to be in case of a zombie apocalypse?"

Was this guy for real?

A zombie apocalypse?

I might not live till next Tuesday.

"Um...I guess not going to the next bar, like Shaun and his buddies. Hmm, I guess staying with you would be good. You would protect your harem and us with your so-awesome FBI skills."

I was being an asshole, but that was my standard mode.

"Once I was asked... I'd hide in a sporting good store if zombies attacked."

I thought about his answer.

"Not bad, Davis."

:::

The cellphone was ringing, it was Em.

"Hey Eddiekins! I've missed you so! How's that melon of yours treating you? Did you hear Carl's getting a ring for that fuck-hot nurse? What's her name? Oh yeah-"

"Emmett SHUT THE FUCK! When are you getting to Forks? I need to you here. You have to help with training Agent Davis. He needs to look like a natural Fight Club member. Besides, I think you are going to fall in love with him and adopt him."

The line was silent and then I heard him gag and cough.

"I don't mean to be "un-politically" correct or whatever, but I'm not into that boy in my ass shit, you and Jas are into. I'm about to get on my car. See you soon, Eddie!"

Then he hung up.

I hate his nicknames...maybe I should give some pointers to Davis, to get my revenge on that arrogant bastard.

"Hey Davis, I have some more pointers...but you need to act like you've known them all your life."

I got up from the sofa, since Davis hadn't answered back.

I knew that Roxie chick mostly worked from home, so he might be getting some afternoon delight...at this very moment.

"Oh fuck, Roxie. Yes, baby."

Did they forget they aren't alone anymore?

Who needs porn?

Just live with a threesome and you get a show practically every day, more than once.

Roxie was just getting off her knees, from the kitchen floor.

Classy.

"Ugh, it's you. When are they leaving, Clapton? I'm getting sick of seeing them around. Lurking about...or moaning and grunting. Seriously, what's that girl so in love with you? It is clear to me, you are into that Jasper dude. It is okay, you know? We are no longer in the fifties, when men hid behind a pretty wife and a house with a white picket fence and two kids. Sheesh, maybe I should go visit this Bella Swan...give a piece of my mind. She could do so much better, than you."

I was about to strangle her, when Davis got in between.

"Let's take it outside, Cullen. Roxie, would you please keep your opinions to yourself. It is not your business."

Roxie huffed in return.

"Don't count me in tonight. I might not even sleep with you tonight even. Teá better support me on this. Siding with this asshole... he hit you."

She kept pointing in my direction, and I was very close to losing it and forgetting she was a woman.

"Rox, go back to your "babies". Didn't you need to check some cellphones and videos?"

With a look of disdain, Roxie turned to leave, only she stopped not looking back.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I was out of line. It's your life. If she knows what's up, then it's her decision. Just know that if you hurt Clapton, you will feel my wrath. He's our life, Teá and mine.

I looked at Davis, and he was bit red on the face.

"Love you, Roxie. But you don't need to worry about me, I can take care of myself. I do need to look beaten up, it's for authenticity. Edward is gonna give pointers. Now go...and I do hope to be sleeping with you next to me tonight."

I felt awkward listening to their private banter.

"Apology accepted."

This made her turn and stare directly at me.

"He better come back. You make sure he comes back."

With that she left, to go to her "babies".

"She loves those laptops...like they are parts of her body. She is one of the best investigators the Bureau has at the moment. I have to say, it was the best bust I ever made...it got me the most wonderful women. Did I tell you how I met my Roxie and my Teá?"

Yap, yap, yappy, yap.

He had to stop his fucking jabber, or I was going to punch his lights out.

"We need to practice. Em's gonna be here soon and I want you to fucking kick his ass. And man you better get in its rightful place."

I was just betting he would pinch something with the way he reacted.

It was priceless.

:::

Jas was talking on his cellphone, looking at the sky.

It was gonna rain, again.

Nothing new for Forks, all dark grey and foggy skies.

The call ended, and he didn't look appeased.

"What's wrong? Was it-"

"Aren't we supposed to be training? Em is about to arrive and he's gonna kick your ass, Davis. I mean, sure you are fit and have some skills being an agent. But you don't have street fighting skills, those you get... in the streets. Let's have a try. You fight me. Masen you watch."

I kept looking at the sky, we were gonna get soaked.

I preferred to fight in doors, and here it was a most under this conditions.

Thoughts...words... were running through my head.

Dizziness and nausea.

I could make out that Jas was teaching Davis some move to counter the coming attack, but I couldn't hear.

_Was I going deaf?_

_Why was it so bright?_

_I closed my eyes._

_A click._

_"You are dead, Masen."_

_A voice whispered inside my head._

_It was like that nightmare._

_Jacob laughing, I could see him, standing over my pale and still corpse._

_He took Isabella by the arm, she looked back at my lifeless body._

_She was willing it to breathe, to move, to save her._

_Only I was looking from the sidelines._

_"GET UP YOU FUCKER! He's taking her away!"_

_No one was speaking... Not Jasper, Carl or Em. It was me, screaming at my dead self._

_She was gone._

_My Isabella was no more._

I woke up and started to cough.

"Eddie! He's back, Jas. Man, you really know how to scare someone to death. What the fuck happened? Jas said you simply slipped away and didn't respond... I think we should take you back to Seattle. Carl was right, but you are too fucking stubborn. We can take care of the Volturi without you. And by the way, you were right-"

I used my hand to show he should stop.

My head was pounding and the brightness of the room wasn't helping.

With a croak, I asked.

"Right about what?"

Em was looking more worried with every passing second.

"Edward do you remember our last conversation?"

I'm annoyed at his question.

"It's always about Rosalie with you. I'm sure you're exaggerating the fact she's perfect for you. I mean she's with that Demetri Volturi. I wouldn't fuck her for all the money in the world. That brown-haired girl we saw back at that club...that's a different story. I wouldn't mind fucking that again. You said she was hot, but I said she was off-limits."

Em was now turning puce.

"You remember that night? You remember how you met Bella? Fuck... Jas we need to call Carl. Something's definitely wrong with Eddiekins."

I simply reacted.

"FUCK! You broke it again! DAMMIT! That fucking hurts! JASPER! This fucker just broke my nose, again..."

I was fed up with Em and his name calling.

"Your ass is mine tonight, Em. Your name will be right next to mine, on the board. I'm gonna give you what's been coming. Hey... where are we?"

I followed Em into the next room.

Em was whispering to Jas, while Jas turned his gaze and stared at me.

"Mm-Masen?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember our pact?"

"Yes."

"Do you-"

A bleached blonde guy came into the room.

"Em, I found the other control, so we can play... Ah, Cullen is up and about. How's your head?"

Who the fuck was this?

He had fresh bruises on his face.

So, it appeared he was in Fight Club.

"How do you know me? You know the rules?"

It was his turn to look confused.

"There are nine rules, to live by. Rule number one, never talk about... yeah."

"Good. Shouldn't we be getting to the meet. I don't want to be late. Em, your ass is mine."

I left them, and walked to what I assumed was the front door.

"Masen? Where are you going? You can't drive...and we don't have a meet tonight. I think you should sit down. We need to talk."

I was about to argue, when there was knocking at the door.

"I'll get it."

Blondie answered the door, and some chick just pushed through.

"EDWARD! I need to speak with you... I'm sorry I've been so distant...What's wrong?"

It was my brown-haired girl.

I growled at Em.

"Mine."

I strode towards her.

She stood still, gazing into my face.

"Want some more of this? I'll give you some, and more... so much you won't get rid of me."

"Edward? What's going on?"

There's no way she didn't remember that night.

"I think you liked to call me Tony. You danced and you flirted, you drank and I watched. Your eyes locked on mine, and since then you've been mine."

Her eyes started to well with tears.

"Y-you remember? Oh, Edward. I love you."

Love me?

Who's Edward?

"Let's look on the bright side. At least we know he's into Bella in any personality, right?"

Blondie looked befuddled.

And Jas... he was a dying man.

With his phone by his ear, his eyes stayed watching me, never straying.

"Carl. We have a problem."

A problem indeed.


	70. This was war

"Where's my car? I need to meet up with Carl... Um... Blondie, why did you say there are nine rules? We only have eight rules. I want to see what you can do. Em are you ready? Let's move, I don't want to be late."

Jas had taken brown-haired girl, apparently called Bella to the kitchen.

I was gonna have words with him.

He needed to get his own pussy.

Or maybe he was feeling threaten by her.

But there was no reason.

He and I, our ties aren't easy broken.

"Ed- I mean Masen, I think you should touch your head."

Em thought he was the funny man.

Ha, ha.

I decided to humor him and felt my head.

Immediately I noticed my hair was gone, shaved off.

I was ready to pounce on him, sure that he was responsible when I touched it.

A scar.

"What is this? What happened to me, Em? Where is Carl?"

"I'm sorry for the man, he was probably ready to get his dick wet, when Jas called him. He's on his way, with his fiancée, nurse Esme. She's into that kinky shit he likes so much-"

"Why am I here? Where is here exactly? This isn't Seattle is it?"

I was getting a motherfucking headache.

I could feel my blood pounding inside my head.

I started to heave.

"Masen? Just relax, stop hyperventilating. I'm sure Carl will know what to do. This is just temporary and you'll be you again. Jas? Man, I need you here. Edward is panicking and I think he might pass out on me."

The anxiety was increasing, I needed to get out of there.

"Don't move, Edward. Sit your ass down. Jas? FUCKER GET IN HERE, NOW!"

My legs seemed to have lost their hold, and I simply fell back.

"Can't you take care of him for a few minutes? SHIT! Put his head between his legs. Masen? Just breathe."

She was here, averting her eyes from me.

Why?

She had to know she was mine.

Since that night, she had become part of me.

She said she...loves me.

Could I love her back?

She looked different from that night.

Not drunk or inhibited.

"What's your name?"

My voice startled her, making her gaze at me.

"You call me... Isabella."

Her voice sounded familiar.

"My Isabella."

She smiled and nodded.

"Your Isabella. You said your name was Anthony Masen. We met at a club. I was across the room and my eyes drawn to you... I will never regret that night, Ed- Masen."

Tears again.

Why was she sad?

"I think I should go... Jas call me when Carl gets here. I'll see you later, Masen. Bye, Em."

Wait, she's leaving?

"Where do you think you are going? Come here, Isabella."

I saw her shiver all over.

"It's really you Tony..."

"Who did you expect? Come here, Isabella. Don't make me ask you again."

I stood and wobbled, falling back on the fucking sofa.

"Stay right there, Masen."

She sat beside me and took my hand.

"I-I though you would never remember that night...the night we met."

"I would never forget you... My Isabella."

I kissed her cheek, intending to find that luscious upper lip.

I could hear that Em and Jas had moved elsewhere.

I didn't think about what they were murmuring.

All I wanted was right within my grasp.

"How did I ever leave you?"

Her brown eyes looked sad.

"You didn't, Masen. Don't you remember the rest? We found each other... My dad is helping you guys against the Volturi-"

I had to stop her.

"The Volturi?"

Isabella touched my face.

"You look the same, but your eyes...they look different. Where are you Edward?"

My lips brushed hers.

"You don't need Edward. You've got me."

I opened her mouth, touched her tongue.

She gasped.

"Mine. Isabella, you are mine."

She cupped my face.

"Yours. Nothing else matters. Yours."

I kissed her again, swallowing her words.

"I want you."

I bit her lower lip, tugging it back.

I moved on top of her, and she didn't resist.

"I want to know all your secrets, and I'll tell you mine... Who's this Edward? Should I fight him for you?"

My Isabella giggled, and I wanted to make her giggle everyday.

"No, you don't have to fight him...he won't compete with you, Tony. You'd be surprised how alike you both are...Kiss me."

I complied.

But it wasn't enough.

She started to grind herself, tilting her hips to gain contact with my own.

"Fuck! Isabella, you drive me crazy."

I pushed back, receiving her moans of satisfaction.

I wanted to feel her skin on mine, therefore I started to show more of her.

I kissed every inch of skin, savoring her taste.

"Mmm Ed-Masen, we can't do this here."

I licked the rim of her belly-button, causing her to shudder.

"Why not? You belong to me...and right now I want to take want is mine."

She used her hands to push on my chest, but I ignored her.

Taking hold of her hips, I thrust myself between her opened legs.

"S-stop, please. Ohhh, Masen."

I wasn't convinced, so I devoured her mouth.

A throat clearing.

"Edward?"

I growled in frustration, at the interruption.

"What? Its Masen."

Carl was standing, mouth hanging open.

"Bella... I need to examine you, Masen."

I got off Isabella, regretting it at the same moment.

I glared towards Carl.

"Give us a few minutes, Bella."

He stayed standing, lost for words.

"What do you remember last, Masen?"

What game was he playing?

"Carl, did you do this to my head?"

His eyes closed, and his hands were angry fists at his sides.

"Masen, you had brain surgery. Too many hits to the head. The intracranial pressure needed to be released, so they had to drill... You can't fight anymore. There's no more Fight Club. You need rest and right now I'm taking you to the hospital. Understand?"

Say what?

"No Fight Club? Don't give me that bullshit. Something is going down, I can tell. I have to be there, and you can't stop me. If things were that bad, I would still be in the hospital. I feel fine, really. Why do you keep calling Isabella, Bella?"

Carl decided to seat beside me, where Isabella had seated.

"Her name is Isabella Swan. But her friends call her Bella. You are too stubborn and pigheaded to call her Bella. She's your Isa-bella. I think its your need to establish dominance in front of other males. So fucking caveman of you, Ed-Masen."

I needed to ask some questions of my own.

"Where are we, Carl? Why is Jas looking so distraught... like someone died? He can't look me in the eye...and Em, he's being more obnoxious than usual. Blondie, I don't know him, but he looks like he belongs to Fight Club. Why am I here? Why can't I remember? Does this mean the surgery failed?"

His eyes closed again, and tears fell from the corners.

"I-I don't know, Masen. I simply don't know anymore. We are in Forks... We need to meet with the Volturi. They are expecting a showdown. Tomorrow night. The date was moved. Felix came to the apartment and Aro called me personally to give the news. I don't know if they are suspecting something. I need to talk with Swan and Davis. You need to rest and not worry about anything. I'll fucking take care of you, even if it's the last thing I do."

He stood and started to leave, but I held him back.

"Whose nurse Esme?"

I saw him sigh.

"She's the love of my life. You want me happy, and I want you happy. You first, my brother. You first."

Volturi.

Showdown.

Brain surgery.

Lost memories.

Isabella.

It was all jumbled inside my mind, all confused and scrambled, searching for meaning.

Who was I, really?

A click.

It wanted satisfaction, only fighting and blood could bring.

No more Fight Club, he said.

That had to be a joke.

There was no way I had retired from Fight Club.

There was no way I wasn't going to fight against the Volturi.

I won't back down from a fight, ever.

This wasn't something Carl could stop.

Not even some brain surgery, dizzy spells or memory loss.

:::

"Why did you tell him? This was the perfect opportunity to keep him safe. If he had no recollection of the fight. Dammit, Carl! What the fuck? Now, he won't back down. It's fucking useless to stop him."

Jas was pacing and cursing.

I feared he would tear his hair, by the way his hands pulled.

"You have to knock him out. Take him back to Seattle. Em, Davis, Jacob, Riley, you and I will fight the Volturi. It was the original plan. Now, we have Davis and Swan with the police backup. Aro must now suspect, it's the only reason he moved the date. Davis is talking with Swan, getting the logistic ready for tomorrow night. Em is calling Jacob, he should be here soon. We'll have some practice fights. We have to look bruised up, or it will be more suspicious. I bet that fucking Felix is making up shit, since there hasn't been no Fight Club in days... Carl?"

Jas stopped pacing, he was now facing Carl.

"I have kept the group alive, letting them have their fun. Only Em, Riley and I have fought in these sessions. I knew we couldn't disband before the showdown, it would be too risky. The regular guys haven't given much thought over the missing Cullen Clan members... But I bet Felix was giving shit to Aro. It was better to keep Edward away... far way from temptation."

Jas touched his arm, getting Carl's attention.

"Is he going to be okay? I'm afraid. I've always wanted to keep Masen with me... But now, I regret seeing his vacant expression. He's lost in there...and Bella, she loves Edward. She loves Masen. She really is perfect for him. Whatever happens she will stay the course. I think it's time you tell him Carl."

Carl shook his head.

"No, no it's not. He isn't Edward at the moment. He doesn't remember what's happened recently in his life. How am I going to add to this? The past can stay in the past a bit longer. I know you think it's pertinent, but I can't do this to him...I was supposed to protect him. I'm his older brother...and yet he's been abused, and taken from me. I'll never forgive myself for my failings. He deserves so much better, than what life has given him."

I heard their words...nothing made sense.

Edward.

Masen.

A knock.

Another knock.

"Come on in, Jacob. You are just in time."

Em welcomed someone inside.

"Davis, this is Jacob Black. He will substitute Edward. Jacob this is-"

He was here...the man who screams...

My hands were choking him, leaving him breathless.

"AM I DEAD? You are the one who will die!"

"Sss-top, Edward."

He could barely talk, and I just wanted him dead.

Something flashed in my mind's eye.

His arms around my Isabella.

He touched her.

He touched what's mine.

"MASEN! MASEN! You need to let go. Listen to my voice."

I felt a pressure on my shoulders, pulling me away.

Coughing and spitting on the floor, the man I just attacked glared at me.

"If you weren't in your condition I would say rematch, and we would see who's dead at the end, Cullen."

I was about to jump on him again, but arms held me back.

The pounding inside my chest, and the ragged breath coming out of my mouth were signs of my deteriorating physical condition.

Another time, nothing would've stopped me.

It gave me pause.

I was sick, probably dying.

It explained why Jas was dying in his on way.

Not one without the other...

"Damn, Ed-Masen you are one crazy fucker. Good thing I'm the strongest of you fuckers, or else you would've died Black. No mistake about it. Did you touch his Bella or something? It would explain-"

Blondie came into the room, he looked at the broken glass.

"I have bad news...I just talked with Swan. Bella hasn't returned home. I had Roxie search her location through her cellphone...The Volturi, they must have intercepted her on her way home..."

Isabella.

She wasn't here?

They took my Isabella?

"I don't care what you all think. I'm fighting tomorrow and I'm getting my Isabella back. No fucking arguments."

"Bells? You mean to say that those fuckers have her? What are we waiting for? We have to get her back! Cullen, if they harm her, you and I are going to fight to the death! You hear me? She was mine first."

_She was mine first._

His words triggered something.

Click.

I saw him hugging her.

I remember Blondie, not blonde then saying my Isabella had been with Jacob...but he had hurt her badly.

A growl came from within my chest.

"You don't get to threaten me. You hurt her. You don't get to rescue her. She is MINE. Don't stand in my way, 'cause it might be the last thing you do. Now let me go, Em. I need to speak with Carl and Jas. You keep watch on the dog. And someone call Riley, he needs to be here.

This wasn't a showdown anymore.

This was war.


End file.
